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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have forced this man to call his wife?

179 replies

MadameDefarge · 11/06/2014 16:35

So, there I was, in line to pay for my shopping at a Vietnamese supermarket. It just so happens a really good one is local to me, but they are pretty hard to find most of the time.

Chap in front is clutching a shopping list, has a few items, and asks the cashier (who really only speaks Vietnamese) for hawthorn. Now she did not understand what he said, I helpfully enunciated it properly, and translated it into French (smartypants or what) she had no idea, he had no idea he said its for my wife.

I said it was probably the bud or fruit of the hawthorn tree (as it indeed turns out to be). Both look blank. He shrugs his shoulders and looks as if he is going to slope off sans hawthorn.

At which point I suggested he called his wife for clarification.

He looked at me like I was stark raving crazy looney laydee. But she is at work! he gasped...

I said she might be rather cross and have a food crisis if he didn't. Still looked freaked out...but did go outside and call.

Was IBU to think that his wife would be pretty grumpy to have sent him to a speciality food store (I am channelling Ina Garten here) and for him to retreat without all the ingredients for her special planned dinner? And to not at least call or text to try and sort it out?

OP posts:
CinnabarRed · 11/06/2014 16:36

I think I would have been embarrassed by you, in his place, and have acted as he did.

MadameDefarge · 11/06/2014 16:37

Really? Ah well. So much for trying to be helpful.

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 11/06/2014 16:38

I think this is one of the most surreal threads ever...

AlarmOnSnooze · 11/06/2014 16:40

I think I would have made helpful suggestions as to what the ingredient was, as you did, but dictating what he did re: calling wife was OTT.

It is none of your business whether he calls his wife, and you have no idea whether she is generally contactable at work.

I would have thought you extremely odd if you had dictated to me in this way.

MadameDefarge · 11/06/2014 16:40

He said it was his wife's list! So all I suggested was calling her to get clarification rather than leave empty handed! Why is that surreal?

OP posts:
MadameDefarge · 11/06/2014 16:41

I didn't really make him! I just suggested he did!

OP posts:
CinnabarRed · 11/06/2014 16:41

If I'm in work then I'm working. I'm not available for calls about hawthorn! She may not even have needed it tonight; perhaps he planned to ask her tonight and come back tomorrow.

Heels99 · 11/06/2014 16:41

Did you force or suggest? You say both.

MadameDefarge · 11/06/2014 16:42

OH ffs forgot to put bloody LIGHTHEARTED in the title.

OP posts:
BobTheFly · 11/06/2014 16:42

Jeez do people really do that? Haha

AlarmOnSnooze · 11/06/2014 16:42

You posted asking for opinions.

Helping out a the checkout, with what the item was, translating etc - all lovely and helpful.

Suggesting what people should do about finding it - busybody.

Imo, of course.

WorraLiberty · 11/06/2014 16:44

No I meant all the detail is surreal Grin

In short...

Bloke in supermarket has a badly written shopping list. You suggested he call his wife to clarify what she meant, but he didn't want to bother her at work.

Were you BU to suggest he called her? No not really.

Cluffyflump · 11/06/2014 16:44

I thought hawthorn was leathal Confused

MadameDefarge · 11/06/2014 16:45

Thank you Worra!

I sort of thought I was saving him a possible falling out later on with his missus...

OP posts:
hiddenhome · 11/06/2014 16:46

Hawthorn helps the cardiac system Smile

MadameDefarge · 11/06/2014 16:47

hawthorn cooking uses

OP posts:
MadameDefarge · 11/06/2014 16:48

I like narrative, it gives body and colour to a story...why be reductive?

OP posts:
FloozeyLoozey · 11/06/2014 16:48

The first bit was fine but I think it was rather patronising to suggest he call his wife, he's not a child. That's something personal he could've decided himself. You were a bit nosey too, he shouldn't have to justify a personal decision to you.

ChelsyHandy · 11/06/2014 16:48

Didn't it occur to you that he could have thought of phoning his wife without your prompting? If he actually wanted to do that. The clue is in him saying "But she is at work"...

Whats with the French?

Twitterqueen · 11/06/2014 16:49

Well I think this is a funny thread OP...

Vietnamese supermarket and hawthorn? fantastic.

The older I get the more shameless I get. I would probably have done the same as you. But then, I'm a woman too and I see the logic Wink

DrankSangriaInThePark · 11/06/2014 16:49

Is Jeffrey still unaware that Ina cooks for random florist males several times a week?

SarahAndFuck · 11/06/2014 16:49

You are unreasonable OP, for not snatching that list from his hands and posting the contents here.

I love a good shopping list thread and have never seen one with anything like Hawthorn on it. I want to know what else she had on there.

usualsuspectt · 11/06/2014 16:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cluffyflump · 11/06/2014 16:50

Oh!
I wonder where I got that from then?.

MadameDefarge · 11/06/2014 16:50

The French is because Vietnam was a French colony for a long time, so thought the Vietnamese woman might be more familiar with the French word for it than the English...

OP posts:
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