To post on Facebook while signed off sick with depression & anxiety?

[SweetTeaVodka]

Disclaimer: I obviously don't feel I am, but am genuinely interested in hearing people's views. I am aware some people think using Facebook is always BU, but I am specifically asking for your opinions in these circumstances.

Although I don't think it's necessarily public knowledge at my workplace, it's certainly no secret that I have previously suffered PND. Some of my colleagues are also aware of my history of PTSD.

Currently I am signed off work for a few weeks as my anxiety is very bad, to the point I was having several panic attacks a day. I am starting back on a medication that worked well for me before and on the waiting list for another course of CBT. The medication takes 3-4 weeks to be effective and causes lots of side effects in the weaning on period so the GP chose to sign me off.

I have been informed today that some of my colleagues have been complaining about my posting on Facebook while off. My manager has told me that this is not a problem with her and that I can post what I like so long as it doesn't contravene the social media policy.

To be clear, since I have been signed off my Facebook wall looks like this:

• A picture of myself and my daughter.
• A picture posted by my husband of my daughter "reading" which he tagged me in
• 2 pictures if my daughter in the paddling pool on Sunday
• 1 picture of my daughter playing in garden and 1 picture of her watching tv on Friday
• Shared a post with some tagged friends re: a mutual interest
• Mention of an opticians appointment the day before I was signed off

So it's not like I've been posting about going clubbing, shopping sprees or living it up at all. Just sharing a few family snaps as usual. What I haven't shared on Facebook are the panic attacks, anxieties and unpleasant side effects.

If you knew a colleague was off with anxiety and depression, would you expect them to cease posting on Facebook, or perhaps expect them not to play with their child or visit their parents?

Yes, I'm starting to see that having colleagues on there was perhaps unwise/naive. I have colleagues from my previous employment still and never had any nastiness, but that was a much much smaller team and very close knit, a different culture to my current job really. Time for a "friend list cull" I guess.

Glad to see that people don't think I am BU for putting a brave face on it and trying to get on, I didn't think people would want to read about the panic attack I had because I needed to go out and get bread!

Thank you for the well wishes, I have been here before and the meds and CBT worked very well then so hopefully I'll be in a much better place in a few weeks. In the meantime I'll continue to find joy in being with my daughter :)

The Best thing you can do is make your colleagues into a list on FB then set your updates to custom and restrict them from seeing what you are posting, that way they won't be able to get upset about you posting.

I hope you feel better soon.

Certainly all of the things you mentioned, I wouldn't think twice about if you were signed off for depression.

I might judge a bit if they were photos of you in a lovely tropical setting, but beyond that, no and that would mostly be jealousy.

You're much better off being out and doing and interacting with others than sitting on your own with all the curtains drawn when you're depressed.

I think it is sometimes frowned upon and I wouldn't do it myself, I had an employee off sick recently for 3 weeks and she was posting pictures of herself out shopping and I know it created a lot of bad feeling within my team, not saying you are wrong to do so but myself I would chose to be cautious about it

I do hope you get well soon I have suffered anxiety in the past and its not pleasant

I set up a second facebook account in a random name for a similar reason. I was at work one day, a girl from our team was off sick with whip lash (it was really bad and genuine) and she had posted on facebook from home saying how much pain she was in.
My boss was reading over another team members shoulder (she was on FB on her phone on her break) and saw the comment and got the team member to send her a message saying something like if I thought you were too sick to work? Get to bed if you are ill. (Team member apologised to ill team member by PM once boss had gone and said she was mortified at having to do it).
She then reminded the team that FB is not private, and they do watch accounts.

After that I kept my posts on my real account to bare minimum, nothing about where I had been or what was going on with my health. My second account where I have just family and friends, I post all sorts, Jokes, funny stories, pictures of me - yes even sick people can be in photos (we are sick not vampires - we don't turn invisible, nor do we have to stay inside during sunlight hours ).
I would either unfriend or set up a second account.

A colleague/employee was recently off with anxiety/stress for a number of months, she posted about her holiday abroad and alcohol +++. While she is perfectly entitled, the rest of her team (who were covering her were very aggrieved and "wanted something done"). Whilst allowed it's foolish and self absorbed IMO. Asking for her holiday time back when she returned hasnot enendeared herself to anyone and created such bad feelings.

I've been wondering about this recently (sorry to hijack a bit) My friend has been off sick with anxiety (I also think alcohol is an issue) and she is all over Facebook on nights out, weekends away etc. She is genuinely unfit to work in my opinion as I think alcohol abuse is causing anxiety or anxiety is causing alcohol abuse (not sure which came first) but from the outside it looks like she's taking the p**s.
Could she be sacked do you think?

Minor, I have no idea about employment law really so couldn't say whether your friend is at risk of getting sacked.

Macdoodle and Lauren, I could understand people being a bit peeved if I was posting about clubbing, piss ups and exotic holidays (although again, being well enough for a holiday and being well enough to work are rather different things). The day before my sickness I posted about an opticians appointment and choosing new specs, but I left off the part about the massive levels of anxiety and needing to be chaperoned there by my DH as otherwise I wouldn't have made it out of the house. Hardly a shopping spree.

YANBU in the slightest. They don't sound very supportive. Hope you're feeling better soon.

Perception is reality.

These people perceive you to be fine enough to post on FB so - rightly or wrongly - their sympathy for your predicament starts to wane.

Either ditch the colleagues as friends on Facebook, or find other ways to pass the time on the Internet. Because there's absolutely nothing you can do to stop people coming to their own conclusions in their own heads about things.

How can posting on FB be compared to working? - posting on FB requires very little effort, - I would compare it to reading a book or watching telly in terms of effort and level of activity.

Your colleagues sound like knobs.

Hope you are feeling better soon

A friend was off for 3 weeks with depression based reasons. Her doctor told her don't just sit around the house use it as an opportunity to get out and about etc so she did just this. She attended a friends leaving do and was tagged on fb in photos.

Literally the next day the entire workplace was full of people saying "well she can't be that ill/depressed if she's going out can she!"

horrific what some people think or don't think...

personally if im ill off work even its with a bad cold or something then I try to get out the house just for a walk and some fresh air, there have been plenty of times thatI ive been unwell ive popped to the shop for meds or food etc and people from work have seen me then reported back to work that (lord help me) left the house.

Just ignore them or report to your manager that your not happy with what people are saying and the judgments being made.

I've been where you are. People don't understand the illness.

I kept posting, but I removed certain people from my friends list. No-one ever said anything, and if they do,I shall blame the illness.

Colleagues are not your friends. I had severe "morning sickness" so badly that I was in hospital for days on a drip and my colleagues objected to me taking sick leave as another colleague was sailing through her pregnancy without a hitch. So obviously I was swinging the lead.

A few people even told me that pregnancy is not an illness.

I would change the settings on your fb account so only your actual friends can see your status. Or don't post anything on there; up to you. Consider an alternate ID for playing any games you play on there.

All your colleagues can see is them covering your work while you're "playing" at their expense. Don't give them the chance. Look after yourself and your family. Hope things are better for you soon.

OP YANBU. Your colleagues are being horrible.

In the interests of protecting yourself from these nasty people I would do as already suggested and change your fb settings so they can't see much. This is why I don't use fb much tbh - there is very little I want to say to everyone! So I end up not posting very much at all I'd save any major friend culls for another time, I think.

Really sorry to hear your anxiety is so bad and I hope you feel better very soon.

Sorry to hear of your difficulties. I've got ptsd. Have you done the edmr? I also have a box of sensory things to help calm my autonomic nervous system when coming into a panic attack. Work place stress exacerbates my panic attacks. I have changed my lifestyle so I just don't do nearly as much. Two social engagements in two days is too much, for example.
My previous job were awful and didnt understand and I was bullied for being unable to take on a huge workload- posts on fb would have been yet another stick to beat me with. The new place don't know about it and I'm managing the condition just about at the moment and haven't needed time off sick.
I would say tread carefully and remember that the vast vast majority of people really dnot get it.
Pm me if you want me to share any of my ptsd relapse prevention tips! I hope you feel much better soon.

I don't think your manager should have told you at all. Especially if you are off with anxiety and depression! If one of your colleagues raised this with her she should have just told them what she told you, that it was fine, and left it at that.

Unless of course she was actually suggesting between the lines that you block your colleagues on Facebook to prevent her having to deal with any more whinging from your colleagues....

I am amazed your manager even raised it with you to be honest. They should have told your colleagues that it's perfectly fine for you to post on your own facebook page anything you want (as long as it doesn't bring the company into disrepute), that they should all be minding their own business, and left it at that.

Oh they judge. You're apparently not allowed to write on facebook, make a phonecall (unless to them) or even venture out of the house. Being signed off means you have to lie in bed and not make any contact whatsoever don't you know It's ridiculous how some employers treat people.

A colleague of mine got a bollocking for being seen cycling when he was off with stress. Erm...exercise is good for you.