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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not understand babies looking like their name

59 replies

WaitingForMe · 09/06/2014 21:12

We chose DS's name when I was pregnant. I loved it and hope he'd look like it. When he was born, DH beamed and said he looked just like a "DS name" and I just went along with it.

He just looked like a squashed up baby. I loved him dearly immediately but never felt he looked like his name. I still love his name and it definitely suits him now but ages, in my heart, he was squashed up baby.

Please tell me it wasn't just me

OP posts:

lifehasafunnywayofhelpinguout · 09/06/2014 22:11

My D.D named herself. She was born with her name written all over her. However some people never grow into or suit their names. xx

IneedAwittierNickname · 09/06/2014 22:11

I.never had a shadow name (never heard them called that either).
Mum instinctively 'knew' I was a girl, she never picked a boys name for me. I've seen her diary from when she was pregnant with me, I was referred to as my name throughout.
Also. My older brothers shadow name was Claire,y name isn't claire.

Ds1s shadow name was Lauren.
Ds2s wasn't

Taz1212 · 09/06/2014 22:18

In my hormonal state the morning after giving birth, I decided I wanted to call DD rose because she looked just like a little rose bud.

Common sense prevailed but I did manage to convince DH to change her middle name from Rachel to Rose.

BrokenToeOuch · 09/06/2014 22:28

We had a few names picked out each time I was pg, then chose for definite in the first couple of days, except for dc3 who was nameless for about 3 weeks. Dp chose the name, I didn't really like it but didn't dislike it either. It suits him now but I think it will sound odd as a teen.
Its been mentioned on this thread though!

Larimarbleu · 09/06/2014 22:43

For some reason, I always think that girls with the name Scarlett should have dark hair, and
Daisy's should have light hair.
Blondes called Scarlett don't look right.

Larimarbleu · 09/06/2014 22:44

The worst is those that call their baby's Belle, which I think means Beautiful.
Now what if that child grows up to be ugly?
What a name to have to live up to?

Larimarbleu · 09/06/2014 22:44

or is that Bella?

IneedAwittierNickname · 09/06/2014 22:50

Brokentoe I rememeber waking dp up.in a panic in the early hours when ds1 was still very young (a few weeks old IIRC) because his name, which suited him so much at the time, was going to sound stupid as he got older
I seemed to think that his name would always seem.like a baby's name iyswim and that he'd get laughed at!
Dp.was like "wtf.woman, go to sleep"
Thankfully nearly 10 years later his name.still suits him,as it does the couple of grown men I've met with the same name!

IneedAwittierNickname · 09/06/2014 22:51

Larimar
Are you Katie Hopkins?

mrsleomcgary · 09/06/2014 23:00

Sorry to hijack slightly but the previous poster that mentioned naming their kids Lydia and Reuben, did you ever watch Southland on more 4? Two of the detectives (they were partners) in it were called Lydia and Reuben.

Larimarbleu · 09/06/2014 23:03

Ha Ha Funny IneedAwittier!

I have a redhaired child called Tyler, so that rules me out I suppose :)

Larimarbleu · 09/06/2014 23:06

I just did a google on Hopkins and the name Bella. Now I understand the question! :)

Actually, I don't usually agree with anything that vile cr3ature says, but I have to agree that the name Bella (which means beautiful) is a huge burden to put on a child ,especially if said child is going to end up looking like Plug from the Beano.

And that's not being cruel - it's fact.

strawberrypenguin · 09/06/2014 23:10

I get it. DS was all set to be x and one of the first things both DH and I said was 'he's not an X' we went with our second choice and it suits him perfectly. I still love the original name but we absolutely made the right choice it was not the right name for DS

IneedAwittierNickname · 09/06/2014 23:10

But to the parents their child is beautiful I'm sure. And maybe people.like the name, not the meaning i dislike it personally

My sons name means 'Gods Gift' or something similar, doesn't mean I think he is!

Larimarbleu · 09/06/2014 23:15

Yes, most children are beautiful, but that does not necessarily mean they will turn into beautiful looking adults.
And to lumber a child with a name to have to live up to (such as Bella) is unfair. But that's just my opinion.

A pretty child does not always turn into an attractive adult,
or, as my uncle used to so nicely put it:
Pretty Calves Make Ugly Cows. :0

Original poster

WaitingForMe · 10/06/2014 18:22

BadgersNadgers has absolutely cracked me up

OP posts:

TryingToBePractical · 10/06/2014 18:41

I have non-id twin daughters. We did ask ourselves when they were born whether one looked more like an A and one more like a B, but could not decide on that basis so went with giving the one born first the name B so she would be second alphabetically.

Anyway, to get to the point I do sometimes ask myself now they are older (11 now) whether it would have worked the other way round. They are very different both looks wise (one blonde blue eyes, one dark brown hair and eyes and personality wise (one feisty, one dreamy). I think A somehow looks more like an A and vice versa, but personaility wise I think it might work slightly better the other way. But overall, they both suit their names and if we had done it the other way I think that would have worked too because we would be used to it that way.

Amongst my friends, some named in advance and some did not. I do not see any difference in how much their children suit their names depending on which they did.

cashmiriana · 10/06/2014 18:52

I had two big babies - 9lbs and 10lbs.

They both looked enormous at birth, especially the 9lber who was short and wide, and got stuck. When she was finally delivered by EMCS, with a shock of thick black hair, angry red face, and general air of discontentment with the world, the mere idea of calling her something delicate and 'flowery' was, quite frankly, laughable. We therefore abandoned any notion of calling her Cecilia.

15 years later, she is, of course, not remotely red and angry. But she's still not a Cecilia.

MilkandCereal · 10/06/2014 18:56

I recently met a beautiful tiny,doll like newborn. He was called Frank. he most definitely did not look like his name,but then I can't imagine any baby looking like a Frank.

SarahAndFuck · 10/06/2014 19:02

We had a fairly good idea of what DS's name would be before he was born because it just felt right when we chose it.

It suited him then and it does still suit him now.

If we had gone with a name that 'looked' like him then DH would have had to go knocking on doors along our road until we found the old man with a bike who would ride passed our house every day, and find out his name, because DS looked just like him, squashed, chubby face and more than a little like Droopy the Dog in those old cartoons.

He changed within days to a more thinner looking face and so was then more Kermit-like than Droopy.

It would have made no difference. We called him Joseph but I spent a couple of weeks saying "Jason. No, not Jason! Joseph! " whenever anyone asked me his name.

We hadn't even considered Jason as a name while I was pregnant, I've no idea why I kept saying it.

ikeaismylocal · 10/06/2014 19:10

Yanbu. Lots of people said to us that we shouldn't choose a name before the baby is born as when he is born we will just "know" what his name will be, he'll come looking like a name.

I thought this was ridiculous, what if your newborn baby cone out looking like a Gareth/Cecil/Adolf/Jayden/( other name you wouldn't choose) .

I think I'd struggle to name a fair baby ebony, or a 10 pounder Willow and I could imagine choosing Rosie or Rowan if the baby had red hair.

Andrewofgg · 10/06/2014 19:37

My DSis had a schoolfriend, a massive great captain of hockey type, whose parents had called her Rosebud. Bad choice . . .

HippyPottyMouth · 10/06/2014 22:42

I incline towards frumpy and dumpy, and Dh is generally big. It seemed highly unlikely that we would have a baby who would grow up able to pull off Grace or Willow. We had a name in mind and when DD was born it suited her instantly. Nothing else on the shortlist seemed right. She's 9 months now and definitely a DD-name not a Mia, which was our second choice.

Mrsjayy · 10/06/2014 22:50

I had names picked they didnt look lkke their names so we chose different ones , maybe its a weird hormonal thing ,

Mrsjayy · 10/06/2014 22:52

I know a joy went to school with her she is and always was a miserable bugger sorry joy

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