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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how much

103 replies

feelinghothothot · 09/06/2014 18:16

Is enough for a family of 4 to have a sah parent? I know this is not a one-size-fits-all scenario, but generally speaking. No debt (except home), happy to go camping but with the odd great day out!

OP posts:
slithytove · 09/06/2014 18:58

We could do it more than comfortably on £30k

So variable dependant on rent/mortgage, area, etc

Burtreynolds · 09/06/2014 19:01

Also ages of children is important. Toddlers and pre schoolers are relatively inexpensive. Get to about 10 years old and they sky rocket cost wise. -may as well turn my cheque book over to fucking school lately

JulietBravoJuliet · 09/06/2014 19:03

I've never been on more than 25k in my life and on that we were very comfortable. I'm a single parent, so all the bills and earning it fall to me. I can live, easily, after bills on 16k. Guess it depends on your lifestyle, holiday requirements etc.

Burtreynolds · 09/06/2014 19:03

I'm staggered at some of the figures being posted on here. Surely £30k is not enough for a family anywhere? I know people do it on less - much less - but surely not comfortably wherever you live?

Original poster
feelinghothothot · 09/06/2014 19:05

7 and 13.

OP posts:
Burtreynolds · 09/06/2014 19:05

Juliet is £25k your total income or is that your salary and you get CB or TC on top?

I always thought I was quite frugal but I'm Shock now and wondering how I just about get to the end of each month!

melissa83 · 09/06/2014 19:06

Easily burtreynolds. I classify myself as pretty rich dd1 has a tutor, goes to lots of classes etc. We travel the world, dh drives a posh car, out all the time etc.

ChickenFajitasAndNachos · 09/06/2014 19:07

He handyman plan is a really good idea. I have 2 I use and they earn a good hourly rate. They always seem to be booked up too.

melissa83 · 09/06/2014 19:07

Op sounds like good idea as easy to work around, in demand etc.

Burtreynolds · 09/06/2014 19:13

I don't especially want to give too many personal details away, but our income is more than twice that and I think we're just comfortable. No travelling the world (one Spanish holiday, one Uk holiday per year), 2 middle of the road cars. Kids have the usual music lessons/hobbies. Nothing extravagant, but definitely not much left at the end of each month. Mortgage is about £800 per month though (don't begrudge this though as we were very lucky with timing and have an average house in an amazing area for that). I don't think my mortgage is that high though?

Foxeym · 09/06/2014 19:15

I earn 21k, DP is stay at home parent and we have 2 teens and a 7 month old baby and we live in SE. We go on holiday to my parents abroad (so flights only), run 2 cars etc. We live comfortably just putting a bit by for extras the kids need. If I earned anything like 50k our lives would be bloody great, roll on baby starting school so DP can go back work

scottishmummy · 09/06/2014 19:18

Depend where you live,accommodation costs,travel costs,do you have car,cost kids club/hobbies

BrokenToeOuch · 09/06/2014 19:21

Burt, our mortgage is £1200 a month, I don't think yours is that high either!
Our house is nothing particularly fancy Confused

CountDooku · 09/06/2014 19:23

I think it depends on where you live and the sort of lifestyle you want. The handyman idea is great btw - flexible and a good hourly rate.

We get by on c.£21.5K. That's DH's salary, CTC and CHB. We have a small car, rent and eat well for around £60 a week. The children are only small, so it's not like we have big gadgets or anything to buy. We manage to save a bit as well - about £80-100 a month, which I know isn't a lot, but it's nice not having to worry. We have a holiday in the UK each year and something like 2-3 nights in London and a day out (Legoland) as well.

We live in somerset and I hope to start working next year, but as I have fibromyalgia I worry I won't get employed.

JulietBravoJuliet · 09/06/2014 19:28

25k was total income. I'm on considerably less at the minute including TC & CB and I'm managing ok, but haven't holidayed outside the UK in a couple of years and have to be very frugal re clothes, days out and things. My outgoings; rent, bills, food, insurances, car etc. are about £1200 a month so anything else is a bonus! On 25k, I had a few hundred "spare" each month, which to me was loads. We went abroad once a year and had nice things.

Burtreynolds · 09/06/2014 19:33

Sorry me again - just trotting up to see where my money oozes off to...about £60pw on food (including lunches), go out for something to eat about once a week...still not that extravagant is it?

stumbles off to scratch head

Burtreynolds · 09/06/2014 19:34

Thanks Juliet I - I always think of myself as fairly frugal so this is abit of an eye opener for me!

VitoCorleone · 09/06/2014 19:34

We manage on 20k a year all in, i stay at home, dp works full time (but ive just been offered a part time job :) ) we live in a very cheap area, share one car, one cheap holiday to Spain every year.

VitoCorleone · 09/06/2014 19:37

Pressed to soon...

We manage happily, love where we live, and when money is tight i enjoy the challange of budgeting (I'm sad)

Laquitar · 09/06/2014 19:38

What is your salary OP and how much is your mortgage?

Marylou2 · 09/06/2014 19:39

£80k I imagine with only one tax free allowance. How many cars do you need? Maybe a bit less if only one.

soverylucky · 09/06/2014 19:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JulietBravoJuliet · 09/06/2014 19:48

A lot of it depends on travel and living costs. I'm lucky to live in a lovely area but I only pay £475 pm rent and £87 council tax. I can walk to work and have no childcare costs, so only put £10 a week in the car in fuel. My car insurance is £27 pm, tax is £30 a year and I save £10 a week towards MOT and servicing, plus £10 a week saved for Christmas and birthdays. Food budget is about £50 a week, and spend very little on clothes. We go out most weekends to National Trust places as we have membership, so no costs other than fuel, and take a picnic. I probably eat out twice a month and that's usually a 2 for 1 type of pub. I don't smoke or drink, and we have no Sky/Virgin etc, just basic freeview. I pay £10 a month each on contents, life and pet insurance, have a relatively cheap phone and broadband package and buy most stuff second hand.

I'm aware not very on can live like this though, it's just what I've got used to!

ChickenFajitasAndNachos · 09/06/2014 19:49

Soverylucky Grin

HerRoyalNotness · 09/06/2014 19:49

You have to work back the other way. How much do you earn, what are your fixed bills, variable bills, yearly bills (to save for), then any holidays you want to take, other savings (house maintenance, car maintenance, haircuts, doctor/dentist visits, long term savings etc...). You'll be able to see then if you personally can afford it.

We can live on DHs' salary, but that would only cover our bills, mortage and life insurance, maintenance. There would be no saving at all, none for yearly insurance, kids savings accts, house maintenance, car maintenace etc, no holidays and we'd have to give up the second car. I'm beginning to think that I'd like to give up work right now for a couple of years, but it would be tight and we'd have no backup funds if everything went tits up. No nice days out, no holidays (travelling is my favourite thing to do), no nothing.