to feel a bit hurt.....

[macdoodle]

Its my birrthday tomorrow, I am not one for a big fuss, I don't like parties, a card and acknowledgement is enough.
I have taken the day off work (because it's normally my horrendously busy day and I couldn't face it on my birthday.
But there isn't a single card arrived (my family are all distant) and DD1 has just told me she will only get me a card tomorrow after school, as she hasn't had time. She's almost 13 and is out with her friends all the time. We have a Tesco and asda round the corner.
I do everything for everyone and always sort birthdays and make a big fuss for my daughters and close family. I have even got XH a father's day card and present from my daughters.

AIBU to feel a bit hurt and taken for granted. AIBU to spend my day tomorrow pampering myself and not bother taking my daughters out for dinner as planned. They don't know I'm off work so I could just come home usual time.:-( I don't normally get maudlin but I'm premenstrual and will wake up in the morning with not even one card to open.

You pamper yourself.

Get a takeaway (of your choosing and definitely not theirs) so you don't end up cooking for the ungrateful wretches.

Happy Birthday for tomorrow

To be fair DD2 is only 6 so not much she could have done, think DD1 attitude has hurt the most. Shed be most put out if there wasn't the usual balloon and pile of presents on her birthday. And why could none of my family have posted a card to arrive a few days before. As far as everyone knows I will be in work so even if it arrives tomorrow it'll be too late really. I could cry though is partly hormonal because I am most definitely not a cryer.

Ha! This will be me next Monday I predict. Be good to yourself, if you can afford it buy yourself a little treat and yes, get a takeaway of your choice. Happy Birthday for tomorrow

"But there isn't a single card arrived (my family are all distant)"

I am so sorry if it turns out that all your family have forgotten your birthday, but how do you know they have? If they "are all distant", would they not be likely to post your cards and would they not be likely to post them to arrive on your birthday, rather than to arrive before it.

I know if I were posting to someone whose birthday was on a Tuesday, I would post 1st class on Monday morning (maybe recorded delivery, if it were a special one).

As far as your daughter's rather casual attitude, towards your birthday, is concerned, you go on to say

"(you) have even got XH a father's day card and present from (your) daughters"

Why are you doing that on behalf of a teenager? It should be her responsibility and, the fact that you've done that, makes me wonder if you are to some degree responsible for her casual attitude towards family birthdays and other events.

Having said all that, 'Happy Birthday' for tomorrow and have some Birthday

I'd feel hurt too. Personally I see nothing wrong with telling people so too, I did a few years ago, cue apologetic family and no issues since then.

plan yourself a real nice day for yourself and return home at teatime hopefully to cards from family get a takeaway or food of your choice from supermarket, bottle of your choice, relax and refuse to do anything for anybody on the grounds 'ITS YOUR BIRTHDAY' make yourself feel special even if they don't and as someone else said, stop doing it for the older one, my boys now have to deal with mothers day, fathers day and birthdays themselves, or at least ask me what they can do. mean we have to deal with the resulting disappointments but hey they need to learn mums are not magic! have a lovely day relaxing 'Happy birthday'