to be unimpressed by the school photographer insisting that the girls let their hair loose for photos?

[qwertypop]

DD is in Y6 and has long hair that she wears in plaits for school. This is a) a school rule and b) something I'd insist on even if it wasn't due to nits and tangles etc.

School photos yesterday and DD came home with her hair loose. The photographer had told all the girls to let their hair loose so they'd look pretty for the photos I totally believe DD on this as she hates having her hair in her face, hates wearing it loose, and was furious at having been told to do it!

Is this normal or AIBU to think it a bit crap and sexist of them? Surely they should know that children look pretty however their hair is?

[xihha]

in my case its coz DD wanted long hair, fwiw I also thought little bro looked gorgeous with his curly bottom length strawberry blond hair but then he cut it off for little princess trust

[ComposHat]

It screams 'potential nonce' to me.

[scotchtikidoll]

ComposHat really? How do you gather that? The OP hasn't said whether the photographer was a man... maybe the female teacher is a paedophile too? It is a bit much.

I remember the photographer (every year) would ask me if I had a boyfriend. It was an attempt to get me to smile naturally, just like when she tried to get me to say 'beans and sausages'. Maybe she was trying to groom me..

I think maybe there could be a photography reason behind hair down- it frames the face better? Of course OP if you feel that this was inappropriate then you know where the head's office is.

[AdoraBell]

This wouldn't surprise me in Chile. Here all the girls have to have their hair not only loose but scooped around to drape over the left shoulder for photos, ffs, but if I were in the UK I would complain and refuse to buy the photos.

[ToysRLuv]

I have had short hair (really short, and sometimes shaved off) for most of my life. It is practical and the right cut will enhance anyone's features. Where I come from (in Scandinavia) it is not that unusual, so I was in for a shock when I came here to go to uni. In the intro lecture given to c. 200 people, I was the only girl with short hair.

To me it seems like in the uk women and girls tend to have long hair until such a time when they deem long hair unappropriate due to fear of looking muttony. The only little girls with lovely, short, neat bobs in DS's class have come from other countries, as well.. The rest all have ling hair tied up with various contraptions. Makes you wonder.

[madwomanbackintheattic]

Another one whose dd was told to take her glasses off for the photos. She has worn them full time for 8 years. The photo didn't even look like her. We never see her without glasses.

[PandaNot]

I can't believe anyone will buy the photo! They'll all look like they've been dragged through a hedge.

My dd has long hair because she needs to wear it in a bun for dancing. I'd much prefer her to have short hair.

[Nanny0gg]

I also bet that a number of mothers had spent ages that morning making sure that the girls' hair was done perfectly.

They'll be really pissed off!

[BillnTedsMostFeministAdventure]

Yy Nanny.

[JonesRipley]

Toys

i have commented onthis before. When I was achild here in the 70s there were always several girls in each class with short hair.


But I am starting to see some signs in the Primary school where I work that things are changing a bit. A few of the year 4 s and up have had their hair cut short in the lAst couple of years.

[JonesRipley]

OP
yanbu. This is sexist.

[FiveExclamations]

Same thing happened with my DD's end of primary school whole class pic. DD couldn't get the two invisible bands that were holding back the front of her hair out, but she let the back down. The two small pony tails at the front didn't sit right once the back was loose and she looked like she had horns.

She's only looked presentable in one school photo and that was her reception one, so I should be used to it by now.

[ThaneOfScunthorpe]

Sexist and creepy. I agree with whoever it was that said it's like a trip back to the 70s.

[ExcuseTypos]

I'd be fuming.

I'd phone the school on Monday asking why the photographer wasnt challenged on his request. he sounds like an old pervert to me

[phantomnamechanger]

can you imagine a wedding photographer "suggesting" the bride, or anyone in the wedding party changed the way they look for the photos?

I absolutely agree OP this is wrong - the message is that little girls should be bothered about how other people think they should look, that there is some sort of perceived norm they have to strive to fit, to be acceptable/good enough

I have some absolutely gorgeous pictures of my DD2, a right impish little pickle, with her plaits and freckles. Hair down would not have been her (and it would have looked a mess!)

[phantomnamechanger]

[Oldraver]

Phantom...there are two on my profiles circa 1972/3... one walking and anotehr posing in front of a bookcase

[SteamTrainsRealAleandOpenFires]

I've never had a school photo taken of me, (as I hate being photographed) I hid in the bogs every time.

[cosmicstardust]

DD's hair is in cornrows at the moment, which she would struggle to take out by herself. Would the photographer have made girls with similar braids in take them out too?

[qwertypop]

About to go to fetch DD so watch this space for an update! Will be kicking off the conversation by asking whose idea the loose hair was and take it from there...

[Minnieisthedevilmouse]

Sounds a bit "jimmy saville" to me wanting the young girls to look pretty for the camera. Did he bring sweets or just puppies too?

I think it's grimy. I'd be def complaining too.

[Notso]

I was really sad when I saw DS1's first school photo because his 'helpful' teacher had brushed his gorgeous longish, shaggy hair into a severe side parting. He looked wrong, like Bart Simpson at church.

I don't think it is a sinister thing. Maybe he just wanted them all to look similar.

[Nocomet]

YANBU, by Y6 the girls in DD2's class would have had very firm ideas about how they wanted their hair (very likely not how their Mothers did it that morning)

They would not appreciate the photographer having an opinion.

DD2 wears glasses and keeps them on for photos (she squints if she doesn't), she is faintly self conscious about them so any hint she looks prettier with out would make me complain.