To sometimes get tired of having to word Opening Posts so carefully

[Summerbreezing]

I just feel you need to go over them with a fine toothcomb to prevent any thread you start from being totally derailed by someone either missing the point, or maliciously picking you up on a particular word to start a bun fight. Sometimes it's like trying to write a legal document, you have to be so careful not to leave any loopholes.

Whatever you do, don't paint a mental picture to set the scene. Well, you can if you're describing a scenario involving a brunette rather than a redhead or a man rather than a woman even if we don't need to know it but ffs don't mention that they were black or Chinese because all hell will break loose.

Next time I make that mistake and have half a dozen PC, PO bandwagonners demanding to know why I mentioned that the cyclist was black or the dustman was Chinese I'm just going to tell 'em "Because he is!".

It is fascinating sometimes to see how some posters can turn the most innocuous thread into WW3. And even when it's been pointed out that they've got hold of the wrong end of the stick, they just won't let it go. Then some other poster comes on and supports them and the whole thing just goes belly up.
This, of course, is the point to just say 'night all'. But then you're accused of flouncing off.

Drip feeding is when you add something that's important. Especially if it looks as if OP is playing 'gotcha'. It's not clarifying the little bits along the way (for all of us express things badly from time to time).

Hold the thought: most posters are not shits.

Yes, it you're twee, or stray into a few shibboleth areas, it can go badly wrong. But if you can avoid hunning, txtspk, hubbies, lols and calling adults 'girls', it really shouldn't precipitate a derailing.

Nope, YANBU. At all.

Sadly though, there are muppets who take offence at the most ridiculous things, who are all too keen to be self righteous on behalf of others who, frankly, probably sit there with their WTF faces on. It's very dull, and there are a few posters that I can almost guarantee will crop up with their rants.

They might think they're right-on clever people, but they just sound like dreary twats. IMO. Obvs.

You would think so meditrina but unfortunately that's not the case. I have so often felt like screaming at some knob 'that's not what the poster said.

Also the ones who come on with a big beaming smile determined to show how tolerant they are and how totally U the previous twenty posters were to find something wrong about someone screaming foul language at their child in the shopping centre.

Yanbu.
It never used to be like this.
Makes every thread a battle.

YANBU. I have (just today) made a point about an op's thread title (but that was because of a word used in it which I and a lot of other people considered offensive in that context due to some stigma surrounding it) but in general, I think some people rush to be offended.

It's usually straight forward to tell when a poster is picking at the op as opposed to a poster genuinely upset by something wrong in the op.

MAINLY because if it's genuine, you can go "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come across like that, I'm sorry I upset you" and everyone moves on with the subject.

Asshats don't let go and never let a perfectly good apology stand in the way of a bitchfroth.

It's important to remember that the former aren't bad people they are just upset and deserve acknowledgement. The latter however are not to be concerned with. It is very sad if someone has to pick apart a post and then be offended by a tenuous interpretation and it is all their problem, not yours if you upset them so much.

Thought I'd give my 2p'th

I had my first proper AIBU yesterday and was thrilled that it did not get sabotaged and that I didn't get slagged off by anonymous posters trolling about.

I like it here because there is such a range of posters and I like that most of the time, we make room for anybody with any kind of circumstance.

I chose MN over NM and BBC boards that I've used previously and think that you just need to be selective about what you say on which thread! Which is annoying but worth it for the amount of lovely, supportive posters

YANBU. This is exactly why I don't post as much as I'd like to.

And before anyone says anything...it's really cos I just cba with the nitpicking - not particularly bothered whether anyone thinks I'm being an arse or not.

Spot on HoneyDragon.

Yes -

striking the balance between posting a great epic including all details (which i just know will be clicked away from by many because of it's length because that's what i do when faced with a mile long OP) and posting a 'to the point' attention grabbing OP is very tricky.

I really admire good emotive short OPs which draw you in.

Asshats?? Did you mean to be so rude to animal milliners?

Wow. Just wow.

Don't get me started on bitchfroth. Sexist, much?

Wow.

There should be a mumsnet posting version of "the script."

• OP posts natural question from genuine need. Includes subjective details which occur to him/her at the time and prevent him/her from being outed on a website with millions of users including friends/family.

• gets accused of being a troll / drip feeder / man/woman-hater.

• Tries to justify his/her autheticity by posting more details.

• rather than advising on the problem, commenters perform a pedantic critique of the OP's two posts and the potentially conflicting details within them. Posts become sarcastic, the troll-hunt intensifies.

• feeling attacked and exposed, already having been vulnerable and having already posted more details than they ever wish to, the OP backs off and/or tries to justify their perceivedly "terrible" thoughts/actions by appealing for sympathy/mercy.

• commenters tell the OP to LTB/call the police/change their life/views radically and overnight.

• OP disappears

• Commenters say to each other "I told you he/she was a troll."

ubiquitous yes, this. Absolutely. There is one that runs along those lines that instantly springs to mind. It's very sad to see as I think the OP is genuinely really stressed and upset and scared, and there's a simmering undercurrent of troll hunting, all very, very careful to be just within Talk Guidelines. Not nice.

ubiquitous

Thats exactly how one of my threads went minus the thread deletion because I'd given far too many identifying details

That was fabulous

Thank you, Honey

No it wasn't.

Lots of threads on MN at the mo get really prickly really quickly, picked apart as above, or are derailed by completely unintelligent drivel. It's depressing and drab.

My favourite dislike currently is the need to state lighthearted in the thread titles, usually in aibu.

if you have nits and need a fine toothcomb why did you not mention the nits in your op?

who left that lying about ffs

I don't start bun fights. waste of good buns.

opinions being like arseholes and everyone acting like a randy baboon waving theirs around aggressively

On that genuinely loud ROAR Officer, I shall go to bed happy! Cheers!