To think that deciding on a shortening/nickname for a DC's name is actually quite common?

[Thurlow]

Apologies, this is half a thread about a thread. Or lots of threads.

I feel like I read loads on times on Baby Names comments that 'nicknames develop over time', or how you shouldn't start with a shortened version and work out to a longer name.

Obviously this applies when your child is still known as Moo because she made a noise like a cow when she was a baby... But not when you're thinking that you want to call your daughter Katie, and then work out to decide of they should be a Katherine, Kathryn etc.

Is it just me, or is it actually quite common in RL to decide at the start that you want a Benjamin nn Ben, William nn Billy, Elizabeth nn Libby etc?

(I should qualify that this isn't exactly bothering me. I'm slightly bored this afternoon...)

Anyway, not sure about common, but I think it's really odd when people post asking 'What could Boo be short for?', and 'working back', so to speak.

Agree on the 'working back', especially if it is for something unusual like 'Boo'. Deciding if Ben should be Bejamin or Benedict would be pretty standard.

And as discussed earlier, I meant 'commonplace' not 'common as muck'

I got a right royal flaming on here for calling my daughter Kate. Just Kate. We preferred it to Katherine, Kaitlyn or Katie, and she has never been known as anything else. It actually really suits her personality (strong and to the point!) and she also has a beautiful, long classic middle name which I suppose she could use when she's older.

My name is very uncommon, with 2 syllables and no 'options' whatsoever. It is what it is!

You and your daughter's 'options' are DOOMED waffle!

I do think nicknames come around they grow. I picked my DD looong name first, then upon searching came across a shortened version that I love, and that was the proper decider on her name. Actually in reality, I use her full name or a nickname that has nothing to do with her name at all!!
I have one of those names you cannot shorten, has no real options, but I have many nicknames from my family that have nothing to do with my name, but are just me, and they all know that. My step-bro is the same, his nickname is completely different to his actual name.
I just think if you want a nickname, call your child that as a nickname rather than working backwards to get to a name.
Waffle- I love Kate, its so surprising how sometimes names just work so well for the child

Why did you get a flaming? I never understand the flaming aspect on baby names Either say you like it or you don't. In fact, I tend to stay away if I don't like it. Or maybe sometimes point out that it's a less common spelling.

I like options. Doesn't mean everyone else has to do it though!

It's so strange, isn't it? This is a subject that seems to properly wind people up, apparently in both directions.

Can't we all just agree that some people do it one way, and some people do it another way, and both are fine!

We do it (we as in all my family) where we get a long name officially and a short name is used. To me, that's perfectly normal. It was normal when my sister asked me 'which shortening will you use?' when DS's name was announced, and I could understand their slight concern that we didn't have a short name ready for DD. It's just what we do.

MIL was baffled (which baffled me). She told me that if X was going on DS's birth certificate, than that was the only name she would use for him. I didn't understand why she was so determined, nor why it was so upsetting for me to be told I wasn't allowed to choose that.

These days we're both more laid back. What I was doing was slightly alien to her, but she got over it and uses the short name. I found her attitude more pervasive (another word for common) than I had realised, and just think my family have a specific naming tradition.

And it's fine. It's all fine.

People will always change it, won't they, WeirdCatLady? I have a one syllable name too. People often stick 'abella' on the end. It's like some people have to come up with an affectionate version of a name.

Sounds like my cousin. Clar- abella.

Pretty much, pumpkin - it's like an unconscious drive people have to find some way of changing a name!

We gave dd2 a long name (3 syllables) thinking there'd be 'options' later on to choose a nickname, but she has only ever been called her full name, and looks confused when people try to use a shortened version. I have a couple of pet names for her that add 3 or 4 extra syllables to her name :)

I've had a couple of people try calling Tommy Thomas, then wondering why he doesn't answer them. Probably because it's not his name and he has no idea who you are talking to

pumpkin - my name is Claire and my dad (who actually chose my name) is always, always calling me Clairabella, or just Bella. He never calls me by my actual name so why bother naming it me

havana - your post made me laugh - I was imaging a little Tommy wrongly coming across as all aloof and disinterested when people tried to get his attention by calling out Thomas

Both of mine have long names and we use the shortened versions.

Ds1's day-to-day name is initials. So his name on his bc (for instance) is Alexander James, and we call him AJ. He's been called AJ since birth, which was intended, as dh is also Alexander and we were avoiding confusion .

Ds2 has a more 'usual' shortening which was not planned but has evolved. Similar to having Harrison on the bc but calling him Harri day-to-day.

The name you will use on birth certificate in my opinion - but it's just an opinion based on my experience. I was given a long name on my birth certificate that was never used, and called by a shorter or derivative name. The shorter name could perfectly well have been a stand alone name, and isn't an obvious shortening - thing Henry to Harry, that kind of thing. It caused endless confusion, different names on different exam certificates, cheques not accepted by the bank, etc etc. In the end, when I was told that the full version would have to be read out at my wedding, I changed my first name by deed poll. I was so upset and horrified by the idea of having a name that just wasn't mine read out in the ceremony (not that I dislike the full name at all, it just wasn't my name), that I considered not getting married before I realised I could change it. I've given my children names that can't be shortened!!

wafflenose you did the right thing, that's my name!

It is a contentious subject for sure. My friend named her son Ed. She and dad were adamant they wanted that. Not Edward/Edwin etc. Unusual but fine. That is your choice. However he was then constantly referred to by parents as 'Eddy'. I never heard them call him Ed. Why not just call him an actual recognizable name and then give the nn? I am fully aware it is none of my business. Just a bit weird.

Why is how you choose to name your child such a MN thing? I have Baby Names hidden as I can't be doing with it.

I don't know, sparkling. I haven't hidden the board but I don't go there often. It's always a mix between the very straightforward "Do you prefer Catherine or Katherine, Robyn or Robin", and the "I'd like a green, winter-themed name for a boy that reflects our Brazilian heritage".

The first seems pretty commonplace to me. I see the second as a 'MN thing'. Though I have never seen the baby name boards on any rival sites so I don't have anything to compare it with!

Squoosh I'm not that Pie person, but we call both our DDs 'Pie'

Little Pie and Littlest Pie. (They have slightly more normal names too!)

It's odd isn't it Thurlow. I thought you just named your DC and forgot all about it. There are rules and everything and I found out too late.

I picked a name for DD as I really liked the shortened version of it, however the shortened one never suited DD and I always use her full name.

It is quite funny writer, especially as the lady who does it is trying to give him a pound. He does look very rude ignoring her.

Oh, I think I can help on the name with a NN pie

Our dogs "real" name is Amber, which has somehow got shortened to Pie.

No" don't thank me, it was my pleasure

(Namechanged for obvious reasons!)

I'm a bit odd in that we decided on Jessica despite really NOT liking the name Jess. I insisted everyone call her Jessica as a baby. If she wants to shorten it, or if it naturally evolves at school and she likes it, then fine, but til then we will call her Jessica (as it happens, some of her friends do call her Jess but she still seems to prefer her full name)

I have been daydreaming about baby names recently broody alert - really like Theo but discounted it as I don't like Theodore.

Theo works as a standalone name though? Well, all names work as a standalone name. But Theo definitely does.