Not to want to receive stolen items as gifts?

[DogCalledRudis]

One friend of mine is a kleptomaniac/serial shoplifter. Her excuse is that she's poor. Whatever. But every occasion she presents my kids with massive legos and remote control toys. I just don't know what to say.

Don't accept as you be charged with dealing with stolen goods. I think she needs help.

You say "I don't want my children receiving stolen goods" surely?

I don't think this is something I'd be agonising about being tactful over!

YANBU- say 'No' and hand them back to her. Isn't accepting them a criminal offence, as well as a terrie example to your DCs?

But say it well in advance of the next birthday otherwise your children will open the presents then be disappointed if you hand them back

*Terrible.

Take them.

I try to say nicely that she doesn't need to risk lifting a £50 worth lego for a birthday present. If you can't afford, then don't. Really

Er... if you don't want them, don't accept them.

Help your friend.

DC don't really know that "auntie Betty" has this sort of "hobby"

I'd say, "No thanks, I'd rather the DC not have any presents that could land me in prison!"

Get better quality friends?

Have you thought about reporting her kleptomania?

It's very simple to say no. You just say no. You hand it back and you say I do not approve of stealing and I am not going to support you by accepting this stuff.

You can't stop her stealing but you have complete control over what you accept into your home.

If she doesn't like that, that's just tough.

At the moment you are saying you are ok with her stealing stuff for you.

She's been to mental hospitals, arrested numerous times, even tagged, banned from many shops. But nothing stops her...

I would just say "Look X, it's really kind of you to think of my DC and want to give them lovely things. But I really can't accept them because the thought that they are stolen makes me feel really uncomfortable. It would really upset the kids if I have to give them back after they've seen them. Whatever you do in your own time is up to you but please don't involve me in it."

Well you're not stopping her either are you? Accepting the goods.

You can't stop her stealing but you can refuse to accept. You are choosing to accept.

That's on you.

You act like you have no free will, no choice but to accept. That's a cop out.

Say that unless she can show you a receipt, you don't want the present.
That if she can't afford to give then that's fine, the kids would rather "aunty Betty" and Mummy stay out of trouble/prison than any lego set.

YABU in that you're accepting them and you don't appear to be reading what everyone else is posting.

You know its stolen but still accept it. You don't want to take the big lego toys away from your DC and the ensuing fallout but you still know that legally and morally its wrong. Do you want to vent about it here but won't do anything about it, or do you want to gauge and see if posters will help you justify keeping the gifts? Or do you want some back up to have a word with her? Unfortunately if it's a mentally compulsive thing for her to do, I don't think she'll stop. But you can tell her that you still love her but you won't be accepting any more gifts.