Mixed gender scout camp??

[FrayedBlueJeans]

Am sort of posting on behalf of Dsis but anyway. My niece and nephew, aged 8 and 15 want to go on scout camp this summer with their unit. My DCs are going too. They will be camping for two nights and threw days in tents and doing walking and watersports etc. There will be around 40 kids, girls and boys, aged between just turned 8, and nearly 16. Dsis doesn't want to let her children go. She is not worried about her 8 year old, more about her 15 year old boy, who will be around other girls his age. She has asked me what i think and I have told she should let her children go, or they miss out on an opportunity. However this has made me consider if i should let my two teen girls go. Who is being unreasonable, and what would you do in this situation? She seems to be worried about what her boy will 'get up to' on camp.

Send the kids, they'll have a fantastic time and they're under adult supervision the whole time. They'll probably feel really left out if all their mates are going and then talking about how fun it was in front of them.

To assuage your/DSis' fears, at one camp I went to, we had a female supervisor sit with the girls, and a male supervisor sit with the boys, until everyone had gone to sleep. The organisers/camp will be fully aware of what teenagers can get up to around each other and they'll know how to deal with any 'attachments'!

If she is worried about her DS's behaviour, then of course she will have to consider if he should go. And then work on whatever the issues are - maybe there were problems on school trips in the past?

For children without behavioural issues, there should be no problems. Mixed Scout troops (and combined Scout and Guide troops) have been camping together for years. It's a well trodden path in terms of separate loos and ablutions, general supervision and enforced lights out (in terms of staying in your own tent/cabin/dorm - the telling of horror stories after lights out being the tradition that has never quite been stamped out!)

Yes, if her DS has a history of behavioural issues - on past residential trips? - then she should consider carefully whether it is appropriate for him to go. Has he done Bronze/Silver DofE? That is usually mixed camping and will be a good indicator as to whether he is mature enough to cope with scout camp.

And similarly, if you know that your DDs are not trustworthy or you suspect they will not behave responsibly, then that is a judgement call you will have to make about letting them go on camp.

For heavens sake don't let them do Gold DofE if you don't trust them though - that's three nights of what can be mixed sex unsupervised camping!

I'd let them go, if they want to have sex then they'll find a way... at least on camp there'll be adult supervision (unlike the golf course where 2 of my friends lost their virginity at the age of 12!).

My foster daughter went to scout camp every year for years. We had no problems and the children were very well supervised. They came home knackered and filthy dirty but happy.

As a survivor of mixed camps id say the worst her ds will get up to will be not washing for a week. If shes that worried then i think she should didcuss it with her ds, and possibly mention it to his leaders if that doesnt satisfy.

I used to go on mixed camps as a teenager, I don't remember anyone actually having sex or really anything that naughty.

My theory was always that teenagers will always find opportunities to get up to stuff if they want to so the best we can do as parents is make sure they have the information and the skills they need to make the right decisions. Equip them to deal with the situations rather than try to keep them out of them iyswim, talk about your concerns and ask them what they think.

Maybe I was just lucky but it seemed to work for us

I went on a few mixed Scout/Guide camps as a teenager. There was a fair bit of cheeky snogging after the evening disco/whatever, but I don't think much more than that happened. They will all be sharing tents with other people (of the same sex!) and the Leaders will be pretty on-the-ball about curfews and so on.

I can't see the problem, it's not like girls and boys share the same tents.

Would you consider stopping teenagers from going on residential school trips because they go to a co ed school?

I am a youth leader for a group which is mixed sex. We ensure accommodation is seperated as much as possible and make sure that it is made very clear that any straying into the sleeping areas of the other sex will result in them being sent home.

Staff will be more than aware of the risks, many were probably young members themselves once, so I really wouldn't worry too much