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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to refuse to retake blood tests?

28 replies

ikeaismylocal · 29/05/2014 11:57

I'm pregnant and me and dp are getting married in the summer, the baby is due in November.

I have had all the blood tests to check for hiv/hep c and blood group ( I'm sure there is lots more but I can't remember them) I hate having my blood taken, I had a traumatic time with them taking blood whilst I was in labour, they had to get a specialist to come and do it and there was blood everywhere, my white mighty was covered in blood, not from the birth but from attempts to put a drip in.

My midwife has told me that if I change my name when I get married I will have to retake all the blood tests as the blood tests need to match my current name.

It costs much less to change your name when you get married and it is less of a faff so we are going to change our names when we get married ( both to a double barreled name)

Wibu to refuse to retake the blood tests? I would be treated as a contamination patient as they would see it as there was no proof I didn't have a blood communicable disease.

I'm willing to take my passport with my old name and my passport with my new name.

We aren't in the UK, the rules are different stupid here.

I just feel it's ridiculous that there isn't a way of updating my information with my new name and I don'twant to put myself through stress because of their stupid system.

OP posts:

CrohnicallyHungry · 29/05/2014 12:08

To be honest, I'd simply delay informing the hospital of your change of name. Unless that would have consequences for you registering the birth of course. But I got married last year and have been rather lax in informing people of the change, so have basically had 2 names for the past 10 months. It hasn't caused any problems yet, I have even applied for a mortgage with all the associated credit/name checks, and there hasn't been an issue there with names not matching up.

QuintessentiallyQS · 29/05/2014 12:11

Can you postpone your wedding?

QuintessentiallyQS · 29/05/2014 12:11

Even better, he can take your name.

ShineSmile · 29/05/2014 12:14

Does the name change happen immediately after the wedding? I thought you had to apply for that separately (at least in the UK it's like that?)

Viviennemary · 29/05/2014 12:16

I think you are within your rights to be annoyed and even refuse. Just don't inform the hospital of your change of name.

softlysoftly · 29/05/2014 12:17

I'd do what Chronically said just don't tell them.

I've been married about 10 years and my bank account and some bills are still in my maiden name.

But no yanbu that's a stupid rule.

LittlePeaPod · 29/05/2014 12:20

DH and I got married in September when I was about 24/25 weeks. No one ever asked me to get new bloods because my name changed. I live in Yorkshire by the way.

Original poster

ikeaismylocal · 29/05/2014 12:21

Dp is taking my name, well we are both taking each other's name which is also the name that ds1, so I will still have my old name, I'll just have an aditional new name.

Everything is automatic in this country(apart from obviously changing over simple blood test records!), we will be given the new baby's personal number when we are still in hospital so I think I need to have my new name, also I think the hospital records just automatically update when I change my name, they did when my ds's name was changed from my name to mine+dp's name.

If you are not married the baby is born with the mother's last name, then the father has to sign to say he is infact the father and then you can give the baby the father's name or both.

OP posts:

bobblewobble · 29/05/2014 12:22

If it's your 12 week bloods you have just had, I think there are more at 20 weeks. Could you not change your name with them before those bloods? That way you will have the next lot under your married name.

I didn't need proof of marriage when I changed my name with the hospital?

QuintessentiallyQS · 29/05/2014 12:26

It sounds very strange. You'd think you were given a number and that you (regardless of your surname) and your bloodtests were matched with the number rather than go according to your surname.

QuintessentiallyQS · 29/05/2014 12:26

Dont they have a national identification number which stays the same regardless?

Original poster

ikeaismylocal · 29/05/2014 12:26

I think I only have this one set of bloods, they were done at around 9 weeks.

The name changing is much easier if done at the same time as the marriage, you just fill in the new names you want and then they become your name when you get married, if I change it before or after the wedding it's a whole other process.

OP posts:

Original poster

ikeaismylocal · 29/05/2014 12:28

Yes my identity number will be the same and I also thought that was more important than the name, my midwife told me the information about having to re-take blood tests, I will ask another midwife or Dr, it just seems so so silly!

OP posts:

weatherall · 29/05/2014 12:30

What country has such draconian rules?!

MostWicked · 29/05/2014 12:31

What country are you in?
Seems like nonsense to me. I would just not tell them and carry on using your current name.

javotte · 29/05/2014 12:31

I had exactly the same problem in France when I was pregnant with DC2, except that it was only a blood type card. I had to have a new one with my new name. And a new one when I was pregnant with DC3, because it was a different hospital with a different computer system.
It cost the social security 50 euros every time. No wonder we are in debt.

I also had to do the diabetes test twice when I was pregnant with DC1, because the midwife couldn't believe it came back negative. "But you are fat... you MUST have diabetes!"

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 29/05/2014 12:42

Why do you need the tests at all? They're optional in the uk aren't they?

PleaseJustShootMeNow · 29/05/2014 12:44

If you are in Sweden then you cannot double-barrel your surname unless it was already double-barrelled when you moved there or you are royalty. You can have the second surname as a middle name. You can be known as and use whichever combination of your names you like.

So John Smith and Jane Anne Jones get married. Jane changes her name to Jane Anne Smith Jones (cannot be Jane Anne Smith-Jones). She can now use any combination of those that she wants, and it's so common to not use first and last name that you are often asked which ones you use. So Jane Jones, Jane Smith, Anne Smith Jones etc or even just Smith Jones.

With that in mind and the fact that you are adding an extra name, but still keeping the original one, I think it's completely unnecessary to repeat the tests.

Original poster

ikeaismylocal · 29/05/2014 12:47

We live in Sweden, javotte that's so rude about the fat comment! Sweden are at least very non-phased about weight and pregnancy.

The tests are optional, so when they ask me to retake them I'll just say no thankyou. I'm sure it is much more of a hassle for them to treat me as if I have all the diseases they test for than just changing my results to my new name!

OP posts:

rumbleinthrjungle · 29/05/2014 12:47

Not that I'm suggesting that you should but wow, doesn't it make you want to ask the trust about the expenses involved to take all that blood again, process it again, print and share all those results again.... compared to an administrator changing a name on a file? Loopy.

ditavonteesed · 29/05/2014 12:48

I would have thought you will need to have more than one set of bloods throughout your pregnancy anyway so just see about getting them added onto the next set you have.

Original poster

ikeaismylocal · 29/05/2014 12:51

You can double barrel a name if you can prove cultural relevance, my ds has a double barreled name and there was no fuss, we just sent the usual papers to skatteverket and they registered him with a double barreled name. I think our child having a double barreled name is enough cultural relevance ( I'd hope so anyway!)

I think they don't make a fuss with immigrants, I have quite a few friends who's children or themselves have double barreled names but the Swedes I know with 2 names just have an extra middle name.

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PleaseJustShootMeNow · 29/05/2014 12:57

They got there fingers burnt a few years back when an EU immigrant took them to the European Court of Justice over refusal to register their double barrelled name. They're probably too scared now. Anyway, as you most likely know, it's all irrelevant anyway as you are a number in Sweden and that's not changing.

SoulJacker · 29/05/2014 14:27

does anyone know if the double barrel surname rule is the same in Denmark? OH has two surnames but I always get confused about where to list it if writing his name down as only part of it is listed under surname part of passport, the other bit is listed as given name but some stuff over here has both names listed as surname. Always worried one day I'll get it wrong and we won't be allowed to board a flight or something as names don't match

Original poster

ikeaismylocal · 30/05/2014 12:45

I'm not sure soul it seems likely they would have the same rules.

The other odd thing is often Swedes put their first nameand middle names in any random order my dp is Magnus Sören Nils but called Sören ( not real name).

OP posts:

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