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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to wish that colleagues wouldn't tell tales about me?

2 replies

Eleanor02 · 26/05/2014 15:12

I made a minor slip up at work and a younger, male, colleague (no 1) brought it up with me (fair enough) but copied another colleague no 2 into the email correspondence regarding this error and I heard her say that they'd log it as a complaint - even though no-one other than this young colleague was, as it were, complaining. I hastily put things right but this has left a nasty taste in my mouth, at least.

Colleague no 1 does tell tales. I once spoke to him about this and he looked sheepish but was not committal. He tends to confide in colleague no 2 a lot and I can't help feeling that she's some kind of mother figure for him in the sense that he finds it difficult to deal with issues without resorting to copying her into emails, emailing her about what's going on in the office etc when she's away.

What's the problem? Well, AIBY to think that a small team of equals (not one of us outranks another - the boss is elsewhere) should not be sneaking around. The office does resemble a school playground sometimes, and a not very nice one at that. Colleagues no 1 and 2 have been in the job longer than me but that surely doesn't excuse their rather odd behaviour. Colleague no 2 has said to me that she wishes that no 1 would 'man up' - well, her accepting what he says (sneaks) at face value isn't helping, is it?

Thoughts? I try to put these incidents, trivial though most of them be, behind me but it's difficult working with someone who, you feel, is waiting and watching for you to slip up before he can go off and tell Miss. And he isn't even the boss. I'm invariably friendly towards both colleagues - but still I'm treading on eggshells instead of, by now, being able to relax into the job. Tried talking to boss indirectly but became tongue tied. It all seemed so daft.

OP posts:
Nomama · 26/05/2014 16:14

OK, logged where as a complaint?

What effect will that have on you and your job?

If it is important then go talk to your boss again. Be very specific. Explain the error you made. Ask if this incident has indeed been logged as a complaint. Ask what effect this will have on your track record. Ask if it can be removed as there was no complaint.

Then leave it with him. Make no reference whatsoever to the 2 people involved, just the procedure.

Quietly learn to play the grown up game and protect yourself - which can be an horrendous way to work. You have my sympathy.

quietbatperson · 26/05/2014 16:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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