To think do you really have a loudspeaker

[kappadelta]

Conversation on the phone in the garden slagging your next door neighbours off when they are in their garden? I mean really? What kind of passive aggressive shit is that?

the not very passive kind?

So is it just aggressive then? It's been on my mind since it happened yesterday. He was moaning about the fucking kids next door (us) winding their dogs up.
My little ones 2&3 said hello twice to their dogs when they came sniffing at the fence.

Oh and after the call he just stood in the garden staring at us through the fence. I pretended that I didn't notice but found it extremely odd.

Well.... revenge..... mmmmm.....

No, you'd need that phone wotsisface had, 6feet high....
No, you'd definitely get arrested...

Ah! Passive aggressive response

Oh Mr Neighbour Man. I have been so upset since I accidentally overheard how much we had bothered you. I have been so upset, so have the kids. They've been crying all night. They had no idea they were 'those fucking kids' they thought they were nice kids. They thought your doggies were nice... oh dear how bad are we Mr Angry Neighbour Man? Tell me do....

May be accompanied by a bottle of wine to complete your cringing apology. But leave the £1.99 price sticker on it.

Mama. It's the latest in a long line of crap that us and another neighbour have had to put up with. He's a functioning alcoholic and I'm not sure what else is going on with him . We've got our house on the market or I would be taking legal action.

Oh! Definitely a put up and shut up moment then.

I hope your house sells nice and quickly... and he stays out of the garden during viewings

Nomama thanks for your support - I need it. Sometimes it all gets on top to be honest. The market is picking up but not fast enough in my area. I have priced realistically to sell so fingers crossed

Wind his dog up for real. If he's going to complain it might as well be a legit complaint.

Princess - in all honesty I feel sorry for the dogs, on a normal day they are locked up in the garage from 7 in a morning until teatime.

If you really want to wind him up OP you could give your kids a dog whistle to play with yes I know that's not fair to the dog

I think our existence alone winds him up

Dog whistles!!!!

Oh, you are right. Not fair on the dogs.

What about you bake bread every day, let the delicious smells waft over the fence and make very loud "Yum, this bread is delicious" noises.

• No, weight gain! Pah!

Erm.... I know, teach your kids to skip rope and bounce balls, laugh, giggle and do all sorts of truly horrible things - you know, the sort of non silent shenanigans 'fucking kids' do

Maybe you could join in and even, well, you know.... Effin Talk To Them

Have a lovely Bank Holiday weekend. I hope the weather picks up so you can spend time in the garden

OP now that the weather is improving I think you should treat your children to a trampoline. They will love jumping up and down excitedly and shouting 'look at me' for hours at a time.