AIBU to post the difference between empathy and sympathy?

[Boomerwang]

As taken from dictionary.com

sym·pa·thy [sim-puh-thee] Show IPA
noun, plural sym·pa·thies.
1.
harmony of or agreement in feeling, as between persons or on the part of one person with respect to another.
2.
the harmony of feeling naturally existing between persons of like tastes or opinion or of congenial dispositions.
3.
the fact or power of sharing the feelings of another, especially in sorrow or trouble; fellow feeling, compassion, or commiseration.

em·pa·thy [em-puh-thee] Show IPA
noun
1.
the intellectual identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another.
2.
the imaginative ascribing to an object, as a natural object or work of art, feelings or attitudes present in oneself: By means of empathy, a great painting becomes a mirror of the self.

So basically, sympathy is for when you haven't experienced it yourself, and empathy is when you have.

Flame away, I just find it a bit... irksome.

I've noticed it on a recent thread. I know I feel sympathy for some people who have gone through something a very close relative of mine has, for example, who has shared how they felt and how they saw it. But I don't know what it is to truly be the one feeling it, I see a snapshot of someone's lives and I can't be inside someone's brain, so I can't emphasise with anyone as I actually have no idea what it's like.

Most people do know the difference I'm sure, it's just when typing fast in a colloquial way, rather than proof reading and thinking about what we're writing lots of people can mix them up or make mistakes. You get the general idea of what they mean so it doesn't really matter.

Empathy means you can put yourself in another person's shoes and understand their view point. Sympathy means you just feel sorry for them or their situation. You can empathize without feeling sympathy and you can feel sympathy without being able to empathize.

It's the difference between "I'm so sorry you're going through that" and "I know those feels bro".

But empathy is not about experiencing something yourself. Something like a grandma dying can be a vastly different experience between two people. It's about experiencing something, it's about being able to see from their viewpoint. Sometime experiencing helps get that perspective, but it's not always needed. A person who's never had a grandma die can still empathize and understand that it probably sucks by thinking about their own grandma and how it would feel if they were no longer there.

I hope that makes sense.

I don't think you're being unreasonable; I always get them confused. :(

Boomerang, your synopsis is incorrect Baby cat's is right.

Empathy means you can put yourself in another person's shoes and understand their view point. Sympathy means you just feel sorry for them or their situation.

Boomer your brief explanation at the end is wrong. No where does is say that to empathise you have to have shared an experience. Correct people by all means but make sure you understand the dictionary first.

How about envy and jealousy?

i always thought empathy means that you can understand/put yourself in their shoes and that you don't need to have shared their experience

How about posting the difference between AIBU and Pedants' Corner?

YABU for thinking that people aren't as clever as you and assuming they don't know the difference.

And copying and pasting from dictionaries rather defeats the object of showing off one's superiority, no?

Very infra dig.

My understanding is that envy means you wish you had what they had, jealousy means you hate them for having it or you have it and you are scared someone is fighting you for it envy can motivate you, jealousy is normally destructive.
I am envious of your dress and may do some overtime to afford one myself
I am jealous of how you look in that dress and I hope you put weight on

Re empathy / sympathy. Empathy is putting yourself in their shoes and imagining how they feel, sympathy is oh dear poor you awwww....

I love love love this:

Link:

Ah look aren't you clever, copying definitions from a dictionary & then getting the bit in your own words muddled . Should I feel sympathy or empathy for you?

I don't believe sympathy is ever useful.

At least you know how to cut and paste.

Am I allowed to giggle?

Oh well op at least you tried see that sympathy right there

Personally I have a big issue with advice/advise which isn't quite the same here comes the empathy but I can imagine how you feel

YABU. You sound like my oh so hard done to ex. He makes a big song and dance saying "I don't want sympathy. Empathy!. I want empathy".

Knob.

i always thought empathy means that you can understand/put yourself in their shoes and that you don't need to have shared their experience

It does mean that.

the intellectual identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another.

It says it right in the definition they copy and pasted. Which is funny they would criticize someone for not knowing what a word meant

Sympathy is when someone has dug themselves into a hole, and you hop in with them.

Empathy is when you give them support from outside the hole, to try to help them get out of the hole (or at least stop digging!)

Not really too long. Watch the link!

Sympathy is when someone has dug themselves into a hole, and you hop in with them. Empathy is when you give them support from outside the hole, to try to help them get out of the hole (or at least stop digging!)

Completely the wrong way round - word mix up?

Ah yes MaidOfStars - I clearly needed more coffee this morning!

Is sympathy always bad? Surely it is possible to feel sad for people going through a hard time and yet have no real identification with how they actually feel?

Sympathy may not be bad from the POV of the sympathiser, although what purpose does it serve except to allow the sympathiser a way of saying how the other's tragedy is making them feel shit? How can you feel bad for someone going through a hard time if you can't identify how hard that time is, other than take their word for it? I think, at most levels of sympathy, we are actually displaying empathy - a friend says work is dreadful, when you went through XYZ you said work was dreadful, therefore your feelings at that time are comparable to your friend's feelings now.

From the POV of the person being sympathised with, sympathy is useless. I rarely sympathise openly with people - for me, it's a self-serving emotion. I tend to offer practical advice and like to problem-solve - hopefully, people feel loved and cared for by me through my willingness to help them!

There's Pedants' Corner for this kind of stuff