To have let this piss me off?

[DontTellMeToBreath]

I have children with SEN and other problems which means often in social situations I find myself in a battle and people often staring.

Today, on the school run a mother shouted across the road to me "Jane!"

I turned to her and she shouted back "Aaaaaaand breeeeeath.... Hahahaha!" After the usual difficulty of getting the kids from school to the car in one piece.

It really pissed me off and it keeps coming back to me. Fuck off with your breathing and your lovely well behaved children who do as they are told and communicate in the way you expected them to when you were rubbing your belly thinking wistfully of the future.

I know, I know, she said nothing wrong and I am bitter. Its true.

Truth be told, its been a good day. Had been.

Wish I didnt care what people thought of me.

I understand, sometimes its something silly that rubs us up the wrong way x

I'm pretty sure she was just being friendly.

How did she say it? It could have been a misguided attempt at sympathising with you.

People that shout these things think they are being smart and funny- they are neither.

My son doesn't have special needs but had a tantrum every single day on the way to and from nursery when he was three. it's horrible to have to tackle these things at the best of times, it's not at all helpful or encouraging to have someone yell about it, draw even more attention to you even if they are "joking".

Hope you're ok OP.

It wasnt sympathy. She was pointing out the fact that I was stressed.
Which I think was unkind. And has bothered really bothered me.

Are you sure it wasn't a ham-fisted attempt at support? As in, "you've done a good job, but don't forget to breathe". Maybe she felt it was friendlier to say something rather than stare.

Having said that, it would piss me off too. I hate being flustered and bothered in front of people.

Too many 'bothered'!

It sounds like such a small thing but if I was having a stressful moment and someone said that to me I would have to fight the urge to tell them to fuck off.

I don't think yabu.

She may well have meant it nicely, but it is at best patronising in reality.

Sounds more like a friendly acknowledgement of a troublesome time to me. I think you are over thinking it.

Might be worth a quiet chat if you can catch her but I wouldn't give it any more thought.

I have a son with SEN and totally understand the want to thump her

Tell her how it made you feel. She will either realise she came across wrong as she was trying to give support or hopefully rethink her behaviour that isn't as funny as she thinks it is.

She sounds like a patronising twat tbh. She was probably trying to 'sympathise' with you, maybe it was her way of acknowledging she was having a hard time too? Still annoying though, don't give it another thought. People have all sorts going on that we don't know about, maybe she was trying to show unity?

Thank you for making me feel better, I feel calmer now its been justified that I can feel a bit peeved at what she said.

Yes patronising, thats exactly what it was.

Next time you need to channel your inner Vicki pollard (little Britain) and shout "I ain't booovered" back as loud as you can muster.

:)