to ask the Ice Cream Man not to stop outside our house?!

[WheresMeBrew]

Picture the scene. It's Monday, late afternoon, and you've two hungry kids sat at the table waiting impatiently. You waltz in a la Luminere and present them with their dinner. Slight disappointment etched on their faces as they realise there's broccoli to be eaten but they crack on.

And then it starts. Feint at first, but getting closer. The Match of the Day theme usually. Eyes light up, knives and forks are flung aside, and they both scramble to the window to look at this god amongst men: The Ice
Cream Man. A chorus of "Please, please, please!" and "It's not fair!" fill the air. The eldest one sulks, the youngest downright refuses to return to the table. I am officially the meanest mum in the whole wide world ever.

Can I tell the Ice Cream man to not stop right outside our house? I can't afford it daily, I don't want them to have it daily, and I can't face a summer of this outburst at tea time every bleedin' day ...

My rule is they can have ice cream if it is the weekend and there is money in my purse. If the Ice cream van came on monday I'd ask them if it was the weekend. They say no and sigh but they accept it. I've had to be firm about it since I came up with the rule though.

If you can afford it once a week can you make one night ice cream night? Makes it easier to say no the rest of the time.

"Do your children not understand that when you say no, you mean no then?"

DD knows that when I say no I mean no (not specifically to ice creams, but to anything), but it doesn't stop her from sulking (she is nearly 14). Even when the OP says no I'm sure she just doesn't want the aggro of sulky children. I totally get where she is coming from.

I'm sure someone trying to keep a living isn't going to modify where he stops his van in order to accommodate your children's lack of boundaries re remaining at the table during meals.

Interesting. I have always seen ice cream vans as relevant to holidays and days out only. Just nothing at all to do with dinner at home - where you'd have ice cream in your freezer if you wanted it.

I find the idea that anyone would think leaping up in the middle of a meal to buy other food is ok, really odd. Different strokes I suppose.

"why do the feel it's even relevant to them" lottie - I'm going to take a wild punt here and suggest that kids like ice cream. Crazy.

....and have an expectation, based on experience, that their parents will buy them one from the van. Don't forget that part.

Shut the curtains and tell them it's the broccoli van.

I feel your pain OP. So enraged by our local ice cream van blaring music at ear shattering levels did I become that DS2 would point at any van and gleefully pronounce 'Look! Bloody icecream van!' He never stops, just thunders past setting off car alarms and pace makers with his jangly ear pollution. He is my nemesis

Iv told mine they are unhygienic also. So never buy from them.

They do get ice cream, but less often as its frozen sugar and I would prefer them to have decent stuff from ice cream parlour

We only buy on days out and have aldi cornettos which are bloody gorgeous as an occasional freezer treat.

Really pisses me off that in the next few weeks an ice cream van will be parked daily across the very busy road outside our school.

School doesn't approve and started selling lollies in the playground which raised funds - so maybe he will give up this year.

The one round our way comes at 5:30 pm. As we usually eat at around 6:00 I'm not going to buy an ice cream then. I would occasionally if it came at 6:30 or 7:00.

Snakey sounds like a godzilla film or something lol

I like the idea above of the frozen frubes, think we will try that!

Based on parents buying them one lottie? Maybe, or also because they see others doing that, or are actually intelligent enough to figure out that the van does sell ice cream? From the OP, I don't get the impression that ice cream is bought every time a van rocks up. I could be wrong, of course. I still say that it's primarily because they know there's ice cream, kids like ice cream, and they want ice cream. Don't forget that part either.

We have four that do the rounds here, sometimes all on the same day. One of them thoughtfully plays his chime loud enough to hear him eight streets away so I have plenty of time to prepare The DDs might ask for ice cream from him, but by the time he's in our street I can't hear what they're saying over the noise of the chimes.

We bought some ice cream once from one of the less annoying ones- his ice cream machine was blocked and he used a rusty screwdriver to unblock it. This one is now known as the food poisoning van.

Just say no.

They could have ice cream in the freezer, given to them as part of dinner.

I grew up knowing we didn't have endless money so couldn't have everything we wanted, including some things that other children had. So you quickly get in the habit of not even thinking of asking because you know the answer. Everyone is in that position because, no matter how much you have, there is always someone better off who has things you can't.

Perhaps more importantly and pertinently to everyone, as people have very different approaches to talking about affordability and that mightn't be the issue here at all, all families have rules, like 'we sit at the table for dinner', 'we have that sort of treat only weekly / monthly / on holiday'. So primarily, I see this as an issue about reinforcement of normal, everyday family norms. It's about creating expectations and sticking to them.

I can see there are still moments of hope and disappointment for all children. I'd have thought though, that because this happens every day, it's actually easier to ignore, by habit, than if it weekly or fortnightly so raised hopes of a treat.

Eau I suspect that there's little point in playing the music at a low volume.

I can hear all the others coming, there's no reason for that particular one to be loud enough to drown out conversation.

How the feckery buggery do they always turn up at dinner time?!

My son is autistic and when he hears the van he says "no, not today" (because that's what I always say)

But he always has to stand at the window and watch the van. My neighbours must think my son is a poor deprived lad! But I have 3 children & it's so expensive.

The van always stops just to the side of my house as I'm at the end of the dead end street by the turning point.

But your children will have to understand no means no. But it does pee me off that they always turn up at dinner time.

I moved, and it still turns up at dinner time here! How?!

My DCs (7 & 9) get pocket money based on behaviour and doing certain jobs.

Whenever the icecream man comes if they want one they have a choice use their own money or get a 'free' one out of the freezer

School doesn't approve and started selling lollies in the playground which raised funds

Is this a primary or secondary school? I'd have been more annoyed at the school starting to sell lollies!

Par contre, if there's loads of competition around there is clearly every reason to be the loudest!