To be considering going to DS's college interview with him?

[tabulahrasa]

He has AS and a speech disorder...so communication difficulties (well miscommunication really, lol) and his speech itself isn't always understood by strangers.

He is completely capable of both attending college and completing the course he's applied for and meets the entry requirements. He will need a little bit of support during the transition to college, which would mostly just be a named person to go to with any issues and access to IT for written assignments - which they do provide (and I know their provision is good) and it should have said he has disabilities in his application.

However his current school 'helped' him with applications and I know that at least one was sent away without it being stated (not this one) that he has a disability. (the school have not been fantastic with support provision, far far from it in fact)

I'll be taking him because of the time of day anyway - if he was NT, I'd go do something else and pick him up afterwards, as having a parent there seems really bad, but...

There is a very high chance they're going to struggle to understand his speech at least to start with and that he is going to struggle to answer questions about himself.

Would it be really bad to walk up with him and wait with him until he's taken in so that they know I'm available if needed?

What does he want you to do?

Maybe post on the sn board and see how parents in a similar situation have handled it? Not sure anything from AIBU is going to help.

Fwiw, with dd2 in similar circs (not AS but comms) she will be going on her own. She needs to prove to herself and the interviewer that she can manage independently. (I'll take her and drop her off, but she can navigate the interview/ waiting etc alone). Obv she will be prepped to within an inch of her life, but if she isn't capable of the interview, then I would be looking for a much more heavily supported program, and discussing with the registrar and program directors ahead of time.

I think that you being there might make them look sideways at him and wonder if he will cope with independant study.

Could you get him to write a note which he can hand over at the start of the interview, stating exactly what his disability is, and offering to write down anything they can't understand him say (assuming he can do that). Possibly written together with a medical professional if he wants support in writing it.

I just suspect if you go and try to explain to them, he may well get marked down as either "he can't cope on his own" or "he has one of those mums who will give the tutors hassle".

He's only focused on the fact that he's pretty confident he can manage the course...he has absolutely no self consciousness at all, so he'll be quite happy to have company while he's there (and not care that that's his mum) but equally would be fine being alone.

He's very good at the subject so he thinks it's pretty much a done deal...

madwoman - I posted in AIBU, just to see how it comes across to people that may or may not have experience of SNs, if you see what I mean.

The thing is, he's actually pretty independent, navigating will not be an issue, or waiting, he's very disciplined when it comes to things like studying - the program itself will not be an issue.

What he's not good at is talking about himself when it's not to do with the subject.

Is there a disability worker at the college who could help/attend/explain/pave the way/introduce him and leave or whatever ds is comfortable with?

If this was possible it would be better than you attending and allow ds to be more independent.

When you say college, do you mean post GCSE or post A-Level?

DS1 (has Asperger's) is taking GCSE's this month (eek) and will be going to college in September. He had interviews at two local colleges & every applicant had at least one parent/carer with them. So, if for a post GCSE course, then definitely go. In fact the college may be expecting you to.

If it is for a post A-Level college (so more like university) then I would go on whether your DS wants you there or not. You could always contact the Student Support department via e-mail to make sure that they are aware of your DSs needs, this information should then be passed on to the interviewer.

Is this an FE college? I had the impression that parents were expected to go to interviews for those. At our local one, you have to get a parental signature for your application, and they send reports home to the parents.

My children aren't anywhere near old enough to go to college, but when I went myself, a school teacher told me she was going to accompany me to my interview (and did), when she found out my mother wasn't going to.

I would phone ahead and discuss it first, I'm fairly certain all colleges have a department that helps support students with SN so maybe talk to them first and see what can be put in place. That way everyone is well prepared for the interview on the day.

Yes, agree with PP. If you have concerns, you should contact the College Disability Service and talk to them. They will be able to advise you on accepted procedure, and put your mind at rest. All the staff interviewing should be Equality and Diversity trained and will not judge on speaking impairments at the beginning of an interview. They will judge on a mother turning up too, though. The only way I can see that as any way appropriate is if he needs physical help or is under 18.

I think the idea of taking a note in as well is a good one, but preferably written or word processed from your son himself, not you.

I also think he will be there to talk about the subject, not himself anyway?

Well if the problem is he will struggle to talk about himself, and that you think will be his biggest problem, write it down, something along the lines of: "Due to my Aspergers (I'm making an assumption that is why, sorry if I'm wrong) I find talking about myself very difficult. However I am very enthusiastic about and will happily talk about my interest in that."

That tells them to stop the small talk, which is meant to relax the interviewee before they begin the hard questions.
Mind you, he won't be the first one not to like that. I know someone who went for Oxbridge interview and the tutor started with "And how did you travel to Oxford?" as the warm up question. They replied "I can't remember" and burst into tears. They even got in!

I too would contact them in advance and discuss what they can ut in place to support him. I think if you just rock up with him and they aren't expecting you then, as DeWe says he may well get marked down as either "he can't cope on his own" or "he has one of those mums who will give the tutors hassle"

I think that the OP means a sixth-form college, so her son is a year 11 now and def under 18.

Post A level (well Higher's we're Scottish) it's for an HNC course.

I don't think he'd be happy with a note (he's gone out now, so I can't ask him anyway) and no, his writing isn't legible, that's why he has IT support.

There are disability workers, I don't know that that would necessarily help...his speech is, well, I understand everything he says, lol. He had about 10 years of speech therapy, but what he's left with is a few unclear sounds and we find that it takes people a while to tune into.

Actually though - I had completely forgotten about email (eejit that I am), he can email the support centre himself and make sure they know beforehand.

Thanks everyone - that was really helpful , I really should have thought of that myself, in my defense, the letter only arrived today.

BlubellTuesday - oh most of it will be about the subject, those should be fine, but there will be a few questions about him.

is he statemented? If so he should either have a Section 139 learning support plan which outlines his difficulties and support needs. This should have been sent to the SEN team at the college

of he should have a EHC plan with post 16 options and support needs outlined on it - again which should be sent to the SEN team

if he is not statemented it is still worth you ringing the support team at college and discussing his needs - they can let the interviewing tutor be aware of these

Has he seen a careers adviser? The LEA are required to offer careers advice to statemented young people

the above also applies to 18+ courses - although they wont impact on funding as much - they still need to be aware

and you are in Scotland ...so I have no idea if the above applies - I am in England! I imagine it does in some ways

epic cross posting

It's fine - we know how to apply for support, both funding and actually at college anyway.

What I'd got a bit stuck on was that phoning anyone means me having to do it as obviously he needs to speak, or me having to be about to speak to someone.

I'd completely just never thought of email.

I wasn't thinking of walking in beside him and introducing myself or anything anyway, just that I know the layout and they wait in the library and I could have been there.

But, obviously I'd rather he does it himself rather than looking like he's not capable or has a complete helicopter mum.

I think as it is post-A level then you should let him go alone amd send the email. I interview at this level and I would wonder what a mum was doing there, unless I knew there were clear reasons for it beforehand.

That's what we're going to do sonja.

If they know he has AS and that he has a speech disorder rather than just unspecified disabilities I think that will be fine, I just had a bit of a panic because I couldn't work out how to get the information to them without me being involved or there.