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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this was really quite an odd thing to do? *long winded*

14 replies

CiderLover · 09/05/2014 09:44

I am a gay woman and the first relationship I had with a woman was this girl I'm about to write about.

I was 21 and she was 26, she was known to be a bit of a "player" and I was somewhat of a wallflower.

Anyway, we dated, lived together v v quickly (like after 3 months) and were together for 18 months. I always knew she was cheating on me but scared that if I mentioned anything I would lose my home and her (stupid fool!)

Anyway, I caught her once, at a halloween party in a pub I was working in, didn't actually catch her in the act but saw her leaving the toilet with a girl, the girl later sat at the bar and told me she couldn't believe what she had just done - snogged some girl dressed as the incredible hulk in the toilet (my girlfriend). Anyway, just trying to paint a picture, we didn't split up and after a few arguments sorted it out.

Fast forward a few months, she cheats again, we break up. We have the same friends so remained friends, she is in my main circle of friends and this relationship was 10 years ago, no feelings for her whatsoever anymore.

Last night on the way home from work I saw her outside the shop she works at, clearing away some chairs, we chatted as usual, then I said goodbye.

She shouted after me so I turned round and she said whilst laughing "Oh do you remember that halloween party, when I was "shagging" that other girl in the toilet, and you caught me"? (She's always been known to exaggerate. I confirmed I rmeembered, at this point she knocked on her shop window and a girl turned round, it was her, the other woman and she did a playful "oh shit" face.

Who does this? I remember that time well and was really really hurt by it. I just think it's strange behaviour. WIBU to say something to my ex that it was a stupid thing to do or just let it go?

OP posts:
PeaceLillyDoge · 09/05/2014 09:46

Let it go. She's weird.

shakinstevenslovechild · 09/05/2014 09:47

I think I would just let it go, if you say anything it would only serve to feed her ego and make her think you still care.

Dumpylump · 09/05/2014 09:47

Let it go. For whatever reason, she's trying to get a rise out of you....so don't let her.

EmmanuelWoganberry · 09/05/2014 09:50

Let it go, if she’s the sort who exagerates she was probably after a reaction so don’t give it to her. You’re right it is a bit odd though.

CoffeeTea103 · 09/05/2014 09:51

Just ignore her and be thankful that you're no longer with her. Some people are so horrible.

LaurieFairyCake · 09/05/2014 09:52

You deserve better

CiderLover · 09/05/2014 09:53

She is very strange, I don't even believe it was to get a rise out of me, as I say, we are still friends. I just think she found it genuinely funny.

Hey ho

OP posts:
SarcyMare · 09/05/2014 12:17

i bet she just thought it was a funny co-incidence and 10 years ago so wouldn't hurt.
just leave it, and be grateful your not still there.

Ploppy16 · 09/05/2014 12:52

Sounds like you dodged an all singing all dancing billet there!! She seems rather high maintenance and 'me me me' and you had a lucky escape.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 09/05/2014 13:02

Let it go. She sounds a piece of work. She'd dine out on your discomfiture for years judging by this.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 09/05/2014 13:04

She obviously has a totally different sense of morality to you! Just be glad you are not with her anymore instead of upset at how she acted. Clearly infidelity is a joke to her, so its good you have moved on and she can never hurt you that way again.

Itsfab · 09/05/2014 13:11

She isn't a friend to you. She has a high opinion of herself that she thinks you will be still bothered by something she did 10 years ago. Exaggerating what she did is just spiteful and immature.

WaywardOn3 · 09/05/2014 13:13

"Thank god I realised how quick you are to spread your legs" Hmm Would have been my response to that, petty of me but cheaters annoy me

WaywardOn3 · 09/05/2014 13:14

Oh and I'd have said it with the sweetest smile :-)

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