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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think this reaction was completely over the top?

19 replies

AntoinetteCosway · 30/04/2014 16:02

I met a friend today at some lovely ruins-not National Trust, independent. We'd never been before. We went to the visitors centre, paid, had a pleasant chat with the lady working there, asked whether we could take a pushchair with us onto the site (yes, though in the end we didn't), used the loos, bought some drinks and snacks and had a rest with our toddlers at one of their outdoor picnic tables. We also noted and commented on the lovely cakes they were selling!

Then we went to look at the ruins. They were beautiful and the DC had a lovely time exploring with us. There was some rubbish lying around so we picked it up. That's only relevant as I want to demonstrate that we were entirely respectful of the place!

Then we went back to the visitors centre, used the loo again and bought drinks. We sat at a picnic table outside again and ate our sandwiches. We didn't ask whether we were allowed because there were lots of people eating picnics, both at the ruins themselves and at the visitors centre. We were looking forward to getting some cake from the centre after we'd eaten our sandwiches.

As we were finishing, a member of staff came out and said we couldn't eat our picnic there. We apologised profusely and said we hadn't realised it wasn't allowed. We also IMMEDIATELY started packing away. She repeated that we weren't allowed and said it was entirely inappropriate, which I thought was a bit over the top but didn't comment on. We apologised again, she left.

Less than 2 minutes later another member of staff came out and very stroppily said 'are you GOING to move your picnic on?' I was a bit irritated by her tone. I said 'that's exactly what we're doing!' and indicated our now empty table. I don't think 2 minutes to pack away rubbish and organise two toddlers was excessive. She stared at me really aggressively and said 'it's totally inappropriate. You wouldn't go to a restaurant and take out a picnic!' I thought-but didn't say-of course not, but this is not a restaurant and you don't sell meals, just cake! I said, 'we've apologised and explained that we didn't realise it wasn't allowed-we've tidied it away now. We've also bought food and drink from your shop-we're not just using the facilities without contributing.' She repeated herself even more angrily and I said 'there's no need to be cross about it, you're really overreacting.' She repeated herself AGAIN and gave us another hard stare before stomping off.

I feel a bit upset about this and am tempted to write and say I feel it's very unfriendly and bad customer service. It was a lovely place and we had a great time but they pretty much threw us out because we brought sandwiches, which we apologised about several times. We wouldn't have brought them if they had a restaurant but the website clearly showed picnic tables and there were people eating picnics all over the place! I am perfectly willing to accept that we should have checked first-and always will in future-but wasn't their reaction a bit ridiculous?!

Sorry this is long. Am annoyed.

OP posts:
LondonForTheWeekend · 30/04/2014 16:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WorraLiberty · 30/04/2014 16:07

Are you sure it was less than two minutes later that you were asked again to move your picnic?

It seems well OTT

UriGeller · 30/04/2014 16:07

So they don't even have a restaurant? Confused

YY name and shame. Maybe a bunch of us could go down there with our packed lunches and have a mass protest.

sonjadog · 30/04/2014 16:10

Really over the top reaction. I'd guess that there is something going on with that woman, nothing to do with you, and it made her reaction to you over the top.

AntoinetteCosway · 30/04/2014 16:11

Yes, we literally shoved the tin foil in our handbags, wiped the DC's hands and were finishing drinks. We were quick-we didn't have a lot with us and we started at the point the first woman was talking to us.

Am not sure about naming and shaming. Let me think about it! I want them to be nicer to customers (though the woman at the start of the day was very friendly) but I don't want bad press for what is quite a small, family-run place.

OP posts:
AntoinetteCosway · 30/04/2014 16:12

Uri yep, no restaurant. At the till where you buy tickets they also had a fridge with cold drinks, tea and coffee machines and some cakes.

OP posts:
IkeaFurnitureAssemblyChampions · 30/04/2014 16:13

What were the other picnickers eating? Just cake?

AntoinetteCosway · 30/04/2014 16:14

Nope-picnics! Sandwiches, crisps etc. Annoyingly we were the last eating so when we got told off all the other groups had finished and sat there looking embarassed

OP posts:
DaisyMasie · 30/04/2014 16:19

They were the ones behaving totally inappropriately. They must be well used to people eating picnics there as you were among a number of groups doing so on that particular day. I would write to someone more senior at the centre and complain.

AntoinetteCosway · 30/04/2014 16:22

I think I will Daisy. She probably was just having a bad day (and given that they used almost the same phrase about I inappropriateness I imagine she had sent out the first woman with instructions on what to say) but it was really off putting and a shame to end an otherwise lovely day with such a sour taste in our mouths.

OP posts:
cardamomginger · 30/04/2014 16:27

Sounds deranged.

Definitely complain about her attitude and also point out that if they don't want people eating their own food at the picnic tables, they should have signage stating as much, and provide a larger selection of food and drink in the shop, particularly if they are putting themselves forward as 'family friendly' - given that they said you could take a buggy with you, I think we can argue that they are.

BillyBanter · 30/04/2014 16:28

Definitely write and complain. It's just so unnecessarily aggressive and rude.

OMG you have violated our picnic table with your filthy sandwiches!!!

KEGirlOnFire · 30/04/2014 16:28

I would also double and triple check the website, just to make sure that there was absolutely no mention of NOT eating picnics there. To cover your back (not that you should have to - they were totally inappropriate). Sorry that your visit was ruined. Sad

DearDarling · 30/04/2014 16:36

definitely complain, I'm feeling angry on your behalf. They could've at least asked you nicely.

SabrinaMulhollandJjones · 30/04/2014 16:38

YANBU! How horrible for you. Complete over-reaction.

Don't name and shame - never ends well on MN - a polite, well-worded complaint sounds more appropriate.

pinkdelight · 30/04/2014 17:44

Are they paid employees or volunteers? Not that YWBU either way, but it can be trickier in terms of demanding great customer service if they're volunteers. Volunteers can also be more finickity about this kinda thing ime.

Aeroflotgirl · 30/04/2014 18:02

Totally ott, I would Tweet them, as that gets a rapid more appropriate response. Do they actually want custom!

frecklefootie · 30/04/2014 18:02

Good point pink

Some lovely volunteers out there.

But, there is, in my opinion, a certain narcissistic "type" who can volunteer at heritage sites, folk festivals, churches as some sort of status thing, like "look at me, I'm now a Defender of the Nations Heritage".

Unfortunately once they realise that it really just is down to being basic and friendly and mucking in, and having a badge saying ENGLISH HISTORY VOLUNTEER AT HERITAGE SITE they're not going to turn into Lucy Worsley overnight they then take it out on everyone else.

Roshbegosh · 30/04/2014 18:07

Name and shame, please.

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