Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3

Original poster

To email the local school about these girls.

64 replies

Octopirate · 29/04/2014 17:14

Today I was in the charity shop with DS, I am not at all snobby about charity shops at all and used to volunteer in one for a year before I got my job. 4 girls from one of the local schools came in wearing their school uniform. They were loudly shouting, "I have never been into a charity shop before, I hope nobody sees us" "Ergh be quick" etc etc, they then proceeded to roughly handle the clothes on the rails all the while shouting "ergh look at these sexy jeans" "All these clothes are disgusting why would anyone shop in here" "lets get out it's minging". They were shouting so loud that everyone in the shop could hear. I just thought this was such awful behaviour, from my experience volunteering I remember what a lifeline charity shops are for people who are short of money and the people I volunteered with (mostly elderly people) and of course the charity. They can think what they like about charity shops but they should keep it to themselves and not enter one to be so disrespectful. I am not really one to complain but I am so tempted to email the school and inform them of their behaviour but I am unsure if it would do any good, but I am just so disappointed that some of their pupils would act this way. Should I just let it drop?

OP posts:

JuliaScurr · 29/04/2014 17:52

yes, call the school
obv they have not been taught very good values; these last few years at school are their last shot at civilisation

parentalunit · 29/04/2014 18:09

Surprised nobody in the shop confronted the rude girls. I would let the head of the school know what happened, and ask for an apology from the girls.

(shocked at how many people on this thread think it's ok for anyone to behave in this way! I will release the clutch on my pearls now)

Takingthemickey · 29/04/2014 18:16

I would contact the school not to identify and reprimand the particular girls but as something to mention to all the girls about behaviour in school uniform and general decency.

My DS's school is always happy to hear about behaviour, whether good (to praise) or bad.

KissMyFatArse · 29/04/2014 18:39

I had 2 girls shouting 'whore/slut!'at one of their friends across the road and then laughing. As I'm crossing over with my 4yr old. I could only give them evils as my son was with me when I really wanted to knock them out...

southwest1 · 29/04/2014 19:13

I complained to the school about a group of girls on the train, they were messing around trying to wind up some French students and went to far by making an inappropriate comment about people with disabilities. I emailed the school and got a response from the Head, she then asked me to ring her to discuss it and later I received an email with hand written letters of apology from the girls involved as she'd been able to find out who they were, I couldn't give more than a general brown/blonde hair description.

SoFetch · 29/04/2014 19:18

They were teenage girls being dicks. I know I was one and probably done similar things in the past.

If they were causing harm to someone or doing something outrages, I'd definitely call the school. For something like this, I certainly wouldn't.

Let it go. They'll change.

TattyDevine · 29/04/2014 19:18

I would say don't bother, its not really your concern, perhaps the shop staff, but they can't know who they were and nobody was physically hurt and they didn't break any laws. Rude, obnoxious, probably playing up to their peer group, but not quite a matter to take further in my opinion.

SapphireMoon · 29/04/2014 19:19

I think an email to school good idea. They can squirm [or not..] in assembly when possibly the subject about behaving decently when out and about comes up.
Maybe they will think twice as spys about...

Enjoyingmycoffee1981 · 29/04/2014 19:20

Silly teenage girls. Not pleasant at all, but you will achieve nothing at all. Don't waste your time or energy.

Itsfab · 29/04/2014 19:21

IME schools are very big on children representing the school when in uniform so why not send an email? I rang to report a child doing something dangerous that could have resulted in other people being injured or worse, as well as him, and they were pleased I had called. My son's friend was also given a detention for messing about on the bus. Representing the school is a big thing for them.

Peaceloveandbiscuits · 29/04/2014 19:23

I manage a charity shop and these girls would have been shown the door sharpish if I'd witnessed it! However, the majority of charity shops are staffed by volunteers who are, more often than not, vulnerable people (I was one myself!) and I can think of at least two of my own volunteers who would have taken this personally and would have felt very intimidated, in a place where they should feel safe! I'm cross and sad on behalf of the charity shop you were in! Teenagers do very silly, strange things and it's their loss that these girls didn't stay to find any designer threads for under £5 my shop has plenty!

Joules68 · 29/04/2014 19:26

I work in a shop ( not charity) and have rude customers.... Most are older. Who do I report them to for bad attitude?

EatShitDerek · 29/04/2014 19:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts · 29/04/2014 19:34

I'm with the minority who think it is worth talking to the school. Yes this is pretty stereotypical arsey teenage behaviour, but how else do you expect them to outgrow it unless they're pulled up on it, either at the time or later through school assemblies?

Our headteacher used to regularly remind us that we were representing the school while out and about in our uniform, and they came down on us like a tonne of bricks if any of the locals actually complained about our conduct. It taught us that our actions affect the people around us and that nobody actually thought we were big or clever while behaving like antisocial little shits.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 29/04/2014 19:44

Please tell the school. That way, they can make the decision. I should hope they will be as shocked to hear about it as you were to witness it. I also don't blame you for not confronting them, the best you would have gotten back would be insults.

For all those saying not so bad, the girls who bullied me so badly at school I tried to kill myself several times didn't go into charity shops either. The fact that my mum took me into them delighted them and they loved to bully me for the unforgivable crime of being poor.

People who think like that need to be taught to think again, preferably before they grow up with such prejudice.

intheenddotcom · 29/04/2014 19:48

Any decent school will be interested and at the very least will make an announcement about behaviour when in uniform.

Ev1lEdna · 29/04/2014 19:54

I've worked with many teenagers and I agree with the above. Yes it was silly behaviour and fairly typical of teen girls showing off but an assembly which didn't single anyone out pointing out that vulnerable people work there and buy from there whose feelings could be hurt or who could feel threatened in their place of work as suggested in peaceloveandbiscuits post wouldn't go amiss. It could be they would laugh it off and ignore it but in my experience pointing something out to them which isn't immediately obvious can stir their morality and make them think. Teenagers aren't bad people just a bit careless with other people's feelings and they need guidance. Gentle guidance in this case with no finger pointing would be appropriate here.

Mushypeasandchipstogo · 29/04/2014 19:59

Please DON'T let it go. Phone the school, even if they don't act on it they should know.

matildasquared · 29/04/2014 20:03

I agree about contacting the school. They weren't just messing around--they were being mean about poverty. A good opportunity to learn about charity and compassion.

kennyp · 29/04/2014 20:07

i saw a teen in school uniform being extremely rude about a very overweight woman in mc donalds. i had a word with him right then (much to my children's huge embarassment). didn't cross my mind to email the school, although i didn't know what school he was at but good for you, i'd email/contact in some way.

i went into local 2ndary school about girls smoking and hope they were told off/got their names moved down to raincloud/whatever it is they do at seniors/detentiont?!??!?!

Nanny0gg · 29/04/2014 20:20

Definitely tell the school.

Most charity shops where I live are staffed by elderly people who would have been very intimidated by that behaviour.

What's the worst that can happen? The school takes no action.
The best? Some children learn a little.

Trillions · 29/04/2014 20:28

Tell the school, but also grow some balls - you were too scared to confront a few teenage girls! The chances of children in uniform assaulting a woman with a baby in a charity shop of all places are vanishingly small. It's because most people are scared to speak up that anti-social behaviour is so common.

DamnBamboo · 29/04/2014 20:41

I would contact the school.
Many people are saying 'they're just being silly teens' etc but if silly teens are caught being.... well, silly... I would imagine whoever the adult in charge is would gently remind them/send them away with a flea in their ear etc. about it.

The school will make a point of mentioning it in assembly and whilst the head may choose to make it general to all, he could suggest that he has a good idea who has done it (even if he doesn't) and that he will be watching closely. This will certainly make them think twice - especially in the age of camera phones.

I don't think people can moan about selfish, bad behaviour generally (which happens a lot on) but then not be prepared to address it as and when it occurs!

DamnBamboo · 29/04/2014 20:43

Tell the school, but also grow some balls

A bit harsh don't you think. Some people are simply not confrontational, no matter what size balls you tell them they should grow.

whitewitchofnarnia · 29/04/2014 20:46

It also depends on the school. If it was ds school, they would have an assembly about it and it would be taken serious. If it was dds school they would proverly congratulate the girls for not stealing/punching an old lady and give them a certificate.

Flip

1 2 3