Tram seat trumps

[dagmarsablob]

Was I unreasonable to gratefully accept 2 seats on a busy tram which were offered so my dc (7 & 5) could sit down (youngest on my lap)? They are not physically compromised in any way but just less likely to fall if seated (I usually make them sit on the floor rather than stand).

The old dear behind us certainly thought it's terrible when the elderly have to stand and grumbled away for the next 3 stops making me feel rude and uncomfortable. I hadn't noticed that it was a priority seat until she'd stopped moaning and hadn't wilfully barged in front of anyone who looked disabled/frail/old/pregnant/weighed down/ill/exhausted and would always give up a seat to someone who looked in need/asked.

Should I have refused the seat?

There were plenty of seated healthy looking under 40s with no children in tow. I think it was unfair of her to bleat on, especially when there was a 20 something lad sat opposite with his legs spread so wide he obviously had no intention of moving.

I do wish people would be a bit less sour and just mind there own business. Her comments put something of a damper on a lovely sunny day with the children who for once hadn't made a point of sulking and squabbling until they spoilt things

Your post is not quite clear...was it priority seating you were sat in?

If so, ywbu to not move out of the priority seat once you had realised that was what it was. Though, such seating is in the same place on most buses so not sure why it would have been a surprise.

Certainly at 7 your older child should be capable of standing on a bus even if the younger cannot.

Buses = trams.

Force of habit.

Was anyone standing ? If there was the your 7 old could easily have given up his seat.

If no seat available for elderly person in need your children can stand at that age. However so could 20 year old but you never know hidden disabilities. I remember riding the bus with my friend in her late teens. She sat down at the priority seating and put her two crotchets behind in the rack, and I stood by her and we chatted. Old lady got on and demanded she got up. She told the lady she couldn't stand but she didn't believe her despite the crotchets. My friends has had her leg amputee now as the years of operations she had didn't work on her weak bones. We're you sitting in priority seats?

Best one I ever saw was an elderly woman telling a man with a toddler on his lap to move for her. There were other seats free but he had a baby in a pram next to him. Stupid thing is that the priority seating includes those less able to stand due to very young children she could have sat elsewhere he couldn't so ended up standing holding child. She then turned to someone else and said he shouldn't have been sat there as it's priority seating for the elderly. I had to bite my tongue.

What makes you think the grumbling was aimed at you rather than the other healthy looking young people?

As long as this lady wasn't having to stand, and no other elderly people were being made to stand, YANBU.

on a tram little ones should sit or they could skitter about all over the place and get hurt.

You should have moved. She should have been polite. And you should teach your kids to give up their seats for adults anyway and show them how to stand safely and out of the way.

Your 7 yr old should have stood.

I think our trams must be better than Nigella's because there's no risk of 5 & 7 year olds "skittering" about all over the place. Unless "skitter" means stand perfectly safely.

my only exp of trams was in Amsterdam with 4 year olds and we were told to sit down in no uncertain terms by the driver!
I remember once i gave up my seat for a toddler on a bus because yes he was too small to stand safely and got roundly slagged by some old biddy who was as capable of standing as I was.

Are you saying you didn't give up your seat because it wasn't a priority seat? Wow, not a great example of consideration for others to set your kids. If her comments put a damper on the rest of the day, I thinks it's because you know you were in the wrong.

Why didn't you move when you discovered it was a priority seat?

Swannee No one else wanted the seat.

You haven't read or understood, so perhaps it's best not to comment until you have.

YOU have just perfectly exemplified what this post is about - not the rights and wrongs of sitting in priority seating, but the ignorance and meaness that provokes people into berating strangers.

No one else wanted the seat...except for the elderly lady who was entitled to sit there, if it was indeed priority seating. Was it?

NO she was SITTING behind me and wasn't that elderly anyway She was just complaining on the off chance that someone else had an issue. When she stopped she moved on to gripe about people parking near her house.

OK I have re read my post and see why you would assume I was sitting in the seat while she stood. Sorry if was unclear.

Why on earth would I bother to write on a public forum that I chose not to budge when an old lady needed the seat and expect anyone to tell me I did the right thing?

I did say in my first post I wasn't quite clear as to what you were trying to say!

OP there have been stranger posts on here than someone refusing to give up a priority seat, so anything is possible.

If it was the case that she was already sitting down, then I guess it's just some people are never happier than when they're complaining.