To feel snubbed?

[startwig1982]

I work in a small department of 8 people. Our head of department has a party in July for her birthday. Invitations were given out today. However, only two people in the department for invited (not including me)! Until recently, I was her second in department and I thought, friend, but clearly I was wrong. I know it's her party, she can invite who she wants etc but really? Only invite 2 people from your department? AIBU and do I just need to get a grip?

Oh and their other halves have been invited too!

Maybe as you are just below her, she felt she didn't want to complicate the issue. Well you know where u stand now.

Would it not be worse if there were only 2 people not invited and you were one if them? At least you've not been singled out.

Maybe she had limited spaces due to venue size or cost and as she wanted to invite more close friends and family had to cut back on work colleagues?

I personally wouldn't invite any of my colleagues if I had a birthday party, I see enough of them at work!

Maybe her oh is friendly with their ohs? Or maybe they all go to see a band or some other reason. If she is only inviting 2 then perhaps it's a dinner party?

Hmmm - it's a bit tactless

She doesn't have an oh, Maddy. It's not a dinner party, it's a music and drink party type thing. We're a close knit department but she doesn't really socialise outside of work with any of us.
I'm not raging about it but it is a bit rubbish!

If she doesn't socialise with any of you I'm at a loss as to why you feel left out. Do you know for a fact she doesn't socialise with the other 2? Are they on the same level as you? Maybe she wants to get to know them better, or their DP's are in a position of influence, or they all know each other from the golf club?

Yes we're all on the same level and she doesn't socialise as she doesn't really live near any of us. We've had a few nights out but nothing regular.
I just thought that we all got on well and we were friends as well as work colleagues.

At work we have a department of just 4, me, colleague A, colleague B who was our boss but now isnt but is still sort of (confuses me) and colleague C who is a big boss. Colleagues B and C are getting married to each other and colleague A has been invited to the whole thing.

But is has all been done in whispers and code. I have been dying to scream "I CAN FUCKING HEAR YOU", but havent as yet.

But the killer is I dont care, i really really dont care and certainly dont want to go. They can discuss it openly in front of me, i dont give a shiny shit, its all the whispering that pisses me off.

YANBU to feel a bit put out but I'd just let it go.

My line manager held a garden party last summer (plus ohs) for our entire department of 21. Except make that 20: I wasn't invited! Now that was odd.