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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

This can't be normal??

28 replies

Callindy · 23/04/2014 14:27

Writing this as I don't know where to turn to get advice on this matter and it's just started to become something I find myself thinking about a lot. Sincere apologies too as i am not a 'mum' (so sorry for gatecrashing but you are a wise bunch)...

I'm 28 and have been with my partner for 6 years. We are due to get married next summer and I couldn't be happier with him. No doubts whatsoever, he's a great boyfriend as well as being a good mate after all these years.

We live together in London and have done happily for the past 4 years and have a very good social life with good friends, many of which are mutual and we spend a lot of time together as a result (which I am not complaining about).

Problem - and I don't know how it has happened because I am v happy in my relationship - I joined a yoga/pilates studio last year and got on almost instantly well with one of the instructors. He is 30 and gay (obviously so and quite camp). I go to a lot of his classes and he would often pay me a lot of attention and 'adjust' a lot of my poses more often than others (those who do yoga/pilates will know this isn't uncommon). I can't explain it - I've never experienced such chemistry with someone. He is so funny, charming and lovely (descriptions i would also apply to my lovely fiance, I feel so disloyal saying this) and we met for a drink after class one evening, had an absolute blast and have done it since a few times. It dawned on me that i might fancy him on Sunday night when we went out for drinks. Things became quite flirtatious and i'm as sure as i can be that the feeling is mutual. It's odd - it's not that i am about to embark on some kind of affair with him but I feel madly attracted to him at the same time. So confusing. What to do??? Feels wrong, but he is the most infectious character ever....

OP posts:
KeepOnKeepingOnAndOnAndOnAndOn · 23/04/2014 19:10

You are playing with fire OP... Be careful. Sounds like you are deffo doing the right thing in backing off.

DoJo · 23/04/2014 19:54

He is not gay, he is at least bi-sexual. Gay men do not say 'you are the only girl I could find fanciable', they just do not.

Some of them do - I'm not sure you can speak for every gay man on the planet.

Lj8893 · 23/04/2014 20:37

I have many many gay friends (my nickname is fag hag Hmm)

They are all extremley flirty and charming and if I didn't know better there would have been several times I may have thought they were cracking on to me.
In fact, I have kissed several of them quite passionately in the past, god knows why.

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