aibu or is dh?

[superbagpuss]

I have been working really hard since 1st April and have had no time off for the school holidays. dh works part time so I got cover for his working hours and he has been looking after the children at other times

he went on a course a few weeks ago and needs to get some course work in

aibu to think he should of got this cleared before the children broke up instead of not doing family activities today at last minute. activity was something I planned but I wanted it to be family time

also instead of taking tomorrow off, I have to see my family on my own, again! (with dc) I've had a major argument with them and he is offering no support at all. the one thing I asked was that he didn't get work at the weekend as family time is precious to me and yet he has accepted all day sat working hours

every time I bring it up he says I told him to get work as we needed the money and that I am never happy

Did he have a choice in whether he worked or not? Would you take a day off to visit his family?

With regards the coursework often these things take longer than planned or deadlines creep up on you.

From what you have written you do seem a bit unreasonable.

So he's been either working or looking after the children when did you think he'd do the coursework?

You sound controlling and demanding... And unreasonable

before DC broke up from school he had three full days of doing nothing

his parents life round the corner, I probably spend more time there with DC then he does

Yabu good coursework needs quality thinking time, working and family life are very important, but once his deadline has passed things may improve (?).

Stop being a martyr. It makes a dull op.

If he is working or looking after the children when is he supposed to fit his coursework in?
Why do you have to see your family? Spend the day at home with your children relaxing and playing, have a BBQ on the go for when your dh gets home and enjoy the rest of the bank holiday weekend.
Family time doesn't always mean you have to do pre planned activities.

You sound like hard work

Well, if you told him to get work, he has a point, doesn't he? If he's been taking the main strain of looking after the children, is it really so dreadful for you to have to do so for a couple of days?

A school day isn't a 'full day', is it? And he probably had to do things like shopping, cleaning and cooking while the dc were at school.

You were working hard since 1 April. That was only a few weeks!

I mean I've been working 60 hour weeks instead of 45

I pay for a cleaner and do my share of housework

I'm sorry if it seems grumpy but I've been looking forward to family time for months and it seems dh never wants to spend time with me. either I haver dc or he does, never us as a family

TBH it isn't always possible to do coursework on demand, it takes time to think, plan, etc. During which it may appear he is 'doing nothing' but there are still mental processes taking place.

Did he have any choice over the weekend working hours? And if you did tell him to get work and then tell him not to work at the weekend... I mean you have to take the work when it is available surely.

Do you really 'have' to see your family and if so what is the problem with going on your own, they are your family.

You sound a bit unreasonable and hard work to be honest.