Not coming to ours, I've told dp he isn't welcome at the house anymore and stipulated 4 hours each month to Bil when he can visit the children which we facilitate at a park or similar...I just hate doing it though, he's such a snake!
Dp didn't say much at first until I told him to pack his sh*t and get out (which he did for a week), he did sort of stand up to him after that....well until next time, which there will be a next time there always is!
1st time was because I dared to tell him that if he wanted to come and stay here (for days on end) he had to text and check it was convenient before getting here. That was met with cries of 'you money grabbing cow', 'your trying to take my brother and nieces from me' 'your controlling and manipulative'. Dp barely stood up for me, just placated his brother.
2nd time was when Bil demanded that dp get a loan to bail his sorry ass out. When dp said no, the manipulation started-suicide statistics of people with debt, texts saying 'I'm dying' then ignoring the phone calls, to then answer and say 'it was a joke'. He replied to a text of mine slagging off dp for 'banging on about his financial situation', didn't like it when I told him his financial situation was his own doug and that dp has every right to comment when he already owes us money and keeps asking for me. Cue calling me all the above and more....dp didn't stick up for me then too until I chucked him out.
Then there was last year; telling girls he was going to visit x date and not turning up then getting the huff when dp told him to stop letting them down (apparently it was my fault), then dp asked for photos of kids to be removed from facebook cue weeks of tantrums then yes I've took then down-month down the line we discovered he hadn't took then down just deleted dp and blocked me from his facebook!
The latest one was at new year we had the family down (my side and him as rest of dp family has passed).
Apparently I snubbed him going to hug me when he arrived (I was cooking food and wasn't aware of him trying to hug me, I said hello and talked to him for 5 minutes or so whilst doing food) then he got pissed off when I asked him not to do something with the children which they would normally get into trouble for-ended up with the above comment been said to dp and a load of abusive texts been sent to me.
It's so hard being the bigger person :/