It's taken a lot of courage for me to talk about this issue even anonymously. I cannot seek professional help at this point for a variety of reasons and therefore if anyone has been through something remotely similar to what I am about to describe, please share your experiences by posting here or sending me a message.
I have a severe phobia of something (can't talk about what it is) to the extent that I've changed life goals because of this phobia.
Bizarrely I also find myself getting aroused by thoughts of this very phobia. I've gradually reached the stage where I can't get any sexual pleasure without thinking about the very thing that terrifies me.
:( :(
I apologise if this was too personal to share here or too strange for people to read. My intention is not to make anyone uncomfortable but to seek honest opinions.