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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to decline a viewing because they haven't got their property on the marketJ

108 replies

stripeytiger · 07/04/2014 22:50

Just wondering if I am being bit unreasonable?

Our house has been on the market for just over a month. Plenty of viewings, sadly no offers yet. Had a call from the agent today to say there is a lady who apparently knows the manager at the agent's really well, she has viewed our place on Rightmove and likes the look of it, would like to book a viewing, can't do daytime and wants us to show her round in the evening at 6.30 pm!!.....ok don't have a massive problem with that, however her house isn't on the market yet, she's thinking about it!! I told the agent that she could see what she needed to on Rightmove, could do a drive past but I wasn't prepared to do a viewing as she is clearly not in a position to proceed. I added that I would be more than happy to show her round once she has her place on the market.

My view is that our house is "for sale" not "open for browsing". Perhaps it's just me but I think she was being quite cheeky, especially trying to dictate the time of the viewing....I have two kids so keeping the place immaculate is stressful but obviously well worth it to secure a sale......but to do all that for someone who isn't ready to proceed?? My gut feeling was fuck right off.....

OP posts:
80sMum · 08/04/2014 10:21

Maybe she doesn't need to sell her house. Maybe she has enough means to buy it outright, or she intends letting her house.

But it's not unreasonable for you to enquire whether or not she is in a position to proceed.

LizzieMint · 08/04/2014 10:22

We're arranging viewings this week in the area we are hoping to relocate to and our house is not on the market yet. But we don't have a mortgage so we're not necessarily tied to selling first, in fact we'd rather move first and then sell. I'd do anything to stay out of a chain. It's unlikely we will proceed on anything this week but it's an essential part of our researching, seeing what we can get for our money in various locations, I'm not sure what we'd do if no one wanted us to look round!

Dinosaursareextinct · 08/04/2014 10:24

She's a timewaster. When you've had a lot of timewasters, having spent ages tidying up the house each time, you get fed up with it. I would say no.

LizzieMint · 08/04/2014 10:25

Ooh also a friend had just had their buyer pull out because they offered on their house the week it went on the market and 3 months later they still haven't found anything. So this time they are not bothering to market it until they've found somewhere to move to.

Fannydabbydozey · 08/04/2014 10:30

I won't put my house on the market before viewing. Houses near me (the two next along from me for example) go within days, often ON the day because of location. I wouldn't put mine on until I'd found somewhere to move to!

Whereas the last time I saw a house I really liked in our price range on rightmove was October 2011! If I was going to view a house it would be because I really, really was interested... We could potentially move very quickly if when/I see a house I want. But you, or an estate agent wouldn't know that.

Kerosene · 08/04/2014 10:31

Perhaps unrealistic, rather than unreasonable.

I viewed a bunch of houses on Saturday, including a couple that have been on the market for >6 months (in an area where stuff seems to fly). Our house is going on the market next week - we needed to see whether we should sell completely, or whether we should remortgage our current place to free up a deposit for one of the cheaper places we saw - hence not having it ready to go yet. I'm actually leaning toward one of the houses that's been sitting around without any movement as it looks better in person than in the photos - but if they'd told me to sod off and come back later, I wouldn't come back at all.

(I also don't see the problem with them suggesting a time - after work is perfectly sensible, and if it doesn't work for you, just say - they're arranging an appointment, not dictating one)

treaclesoda · 08/04/2014 10:36

Obviously it's your house and you can allow whoever you want to view it. But, loads of people are like me and DH. We are not actively looking to move, we are not desperate to sell up. But we keep an eye out on what is available in our area, and if something were to come up that we like the look of, we would want to view it, and then if we were interested we would try to sell our own house.

If we put our house up for sale at the moment, we would be wasting the time of loads of our potential buyers because people would be viewing our house, hopefully be interested in it, and then we'd have to say 'actually, its not really for sale yet because we haven't got anywhere to move to'.

If people refuse to even let us cross the threshold of their house before we have put ours on the market, we'll be stuck here forever.

HmmAnOxfordComma · 08/04/2014 10:41

Exactly the same as Treaclesoda: we've twice viewed before putting ours on the market, because we were only interested in moving for the 'right house'. But each time, we knew we'd found it, went home and put ours on the market and sold them before the board was in the garden because a) we keep our houses immaculately decorated and sellable and b) we've never been greedy on what price we wanted for our house. So our sellers would have lost out if they hadn't let us view their properties.

YABU (if you've been on the market more than a week - first few days, fair enough).

RufusTheReindeer · 08/04/2014 10:44

I understand your point but YABU

We viewed an empty house about 12 years ago, our house wasn't on the market at the time. Viewed it, liked it, put our house on the market and sold it in a month

Until recently we have been looking for a doer upper, I want a particular house and I don't want to sell mine and be stuck with a house I didn't want

It is annoying though and you have my sympathies, is it not similar to having people view who have no intention of living in a house when they want a bungalow or can't afford anywhere near the asking price

RufusTheReindeer · 08/04/2014 10:45

Took me ages to type that

And I agree with treacle and hmm

treaclesoda · 08/04/2014 10:49

I think there are ultimately basically three types of house movers.

There are those who look round there house and think 'right, it's too small/I don't like the area/I can afford better' and decide 'that's it, I have to move. I'm putting the house up for sale'

Then there are those who have to move, due to personal circumstances.

Finally there are those who are perfectly content with where they live but if they saw the right house in the right area that was an improvement on the one they are in, they would sell up and move there in the blink of an eye.

I think it's strange to write the third lot off as timewasters just because they haven't got a for sale sign outside their house.

treaclesoda · 08/04/2014 10:50

look around their house, their house!!!

IamaBreastfeedingTramp · 08/04/2014 10:57

Obviously its reasonable to do what you want with your house.

But I think YABU if you want to optimise your chance of selling.

You never know quite what her situation is (she would be totally reasonable not to want to discuss the details of her finances with estate agents).

She may interpret your refusal as a red flag (and I wouldn't blame her) and decide not to involve herself with vendors who decline viewers(!wtf?)

Exactly what treacle said about the third type

IamaBreastfeedingTramp · 08/04/2014 11:05

Do you make them take their shoes off too?

I think this is a better filter than any! Anyone who seriously thinks they could be buying the cream carpets beneath their feet should be willing to remove their shoes for 10 minutes!

Anyone can tell the agent they're cash buyers or currently renting.

HauntedNoddyCar · 08/04/2014 11:06

We were in treacle's 3rd group. Lots of stuff was on sale in our area so I was nosing Rightmove to see what they were on for. Wondered how that compared to our general area and found a great house.
We viewed and made an offer that day. Then had to get ours on the market and get a mortgage.
We bought the house.

The other thing to remember is that someone whose house is under offer can very easily find themselves without a buyer again. They aren't in that much of a stronger position.

Dinosaursareextinct · 08/04/2014 11:15

I've had people viewing who quite obviously would not want to buy the house. For instance, who viewed the house and then explained that it was not suitable because it would require a 1.5 hour commute to their workplace, or because they required somewhere far bigger. There are unfortunately a lot of pure timewasters around, and it's fair enough to try to filter them out.

treaclesoda · 08/04/2014 11:27

Its fair enough to want to filter out the timewasters, but that's not what the OP was talking about. She was assuming them to be timewasters because they didn't already have their house on the market.

Most of my friends and relatives have fallen into the category of only wanting to move for one particular house, not wanting to move in general so I think its fair to assume that you are missing out on potential buyers by refusing to let these sort of people view your house.

stackablegoatbearingcheesecake · 08/04/2014 11:39

Knows staff at the estate agents = run a mile

We returned to the Agent who handled the sale when we bought a house.
He knew someone he thought the property might suit, she came and said yes, so he then put hers on the market and it all went through in such a rush that we were struggling to get our removals and rental to move into sorted out.

It is a stressful business selling and buying houses and made even moreso because you never actually know the position of the potential purchasers regardless of what the Agent might tell you.

Armi · 08/04/2014 11:43

We bought without selling. We looked round our current place on a bit of a whim, liked it and bought it. I wouldn't be turning viewers away if I were you.

wink1970 · 08/04/2014 11:47

I can actually see your point: our last house attracted lots of 'property porn' viewings from people who clearly couldn't afford it.

As a rule, after the fist fortnight I discounted anyone who wanted a Sunday viewing, and left the rest to the estate agent - they soon wheedled out anyone who wasn't ready to move.

DinoSnores · 08/04/2014 11:52

The way houses are selling in our postcode, when we put our house on the market, it will be on for about a week at the very, very most! (As we keep finding to our cost the other way when we are looking for places nearby.) Our house is decluttered and decorated ready to be put on the market straightaway.

We're looking for the right place but won't put the house on the market until we've found the place we want to buy. It really won't delay things at all.

treaclesoda · 08/04/2014 12:14

one of my neighbours has had her house on the market for over 5 years. She clearly has no intention of actually selling (other houses of a similar standard to hers have sold fairly easily in the area) but would presumably pass the OP's test of not being a time waster. Whereas I could fall in love with the OP's house online, be willing to put my house on the market tomorrow, but wouldn't even get to view it.

I just think that it's not really that clear cut.

Echocave · 08/04/2014 12:21

The way the market in some places is at the moment YANBU particularly if you are in a rush to move. People certainly won't accept an offer if the potential buyer's house isn't under offer to so if this person is serious about buying, her house needs to be marketed as soon as possible.

PlumProf · 08/04/2014 12:26

It's completely up to you who you show round.

You might of course lose a sale. Like I said, it's up to you, and your judgment.

SparklySocks · 08/04/2014 12:53

Why does she have to sell her house in order to buy yours? She could have been considering it as a rental property. YABU.

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