To think disabled people should have exactly the same facilities as non-disabled people?

[Sparklysilversequins]

My children and I belong to Virgin Active. We swim a lot, both kids really enjoy it and it's the one thing they will both do without fuss, exercise wise. Both have ASD, a boy, 11 and a girl, 7. Now here's the problem, ds cannot manage to shower and get dressed alone but at age 11, he cannot accompany me to the women's changing room. The disabled facilities are not great, they are not nearly as nice as the other changing facilities, the shower actually has a toilet in the same room, so it's essentially a shower in a public toilet. Last time we went a cleaner was moaning about all the water on the floor after we had showered. This would never happen in the other changing areas. I've complained and was listened to but nothing has changed.

So today I decided that I would shower ds in the women's shower area and then send him to get dressed only in the disabled changing room (it's fine for that, just nasty for showering). We did this and it worked well though I wasn't comfortable with him getting dressed alone, but I dd and I changed like lightening and went and helped him (takes him a lot longer). So all in all it was fine.

But I am not happy about it. Their disabled facilities are simply not good enough, obviously I have found a way round it but I shouldn't have to should I? we should have the same lovely facilities that everyone else has?

So what would you do? Is there any independent organisation who inspects this kind of thing? I actually laid awake worrying about this last night but like I say luckily my new system worked albeit my son with ASD has to be unsupervised for it to do so, which I don't think is right.

[IamInvisible]

I'm disabled and what you describe is what I have in my house. It is a wet room. Obviously I don't know the state of the cleanliness etc of the one you used, but I wouldn't be without mine.

[CrohnicallyChanging]

A changing/shower/toilet room could have the same layout as a hospital one without being 'hospital like'. If the layout works, why wouldn't people with disabilities prefer it? Especially as it seems to be an improvement over the layout you refer to, and could work for all classes of disability, not just physical ones.

[CrohnicallyChanging]

X post with Iaminvisible- guess some people with disabilities do prefer it!

[Sparklysilversequins]

I think there should be provision for people with other kinds of disabilities too such as autism, I think the standard should be as high and pleasant to be in as the other changing areas and I actually know, having weighed up all the posts I am not being unreasonable

I also think the "it's always been that way, why should they change it" view really rather limited. If your customers needs change then you as a service provider should change with them.

[fayrae]

Surely if there was a demand they'd have changed it already? Are the current facilities up to legal requirements?

[Sparklysilversequins]

We have just joined, so now there's a demand.

They are grubby and not up to the same standard, the fixtures don't work, even the hair dryer is cheaper, the staff use it as a main thoroughfare to the pool so there's relatively less privacy compared to the other changing areas, the drains are inefficient and the rooms smell. I would give the areas around 9/10 for how nice they are, I would give the disabled room about 2/10.

[Sparklysilversequins]

As pointed out earlier they can meet legal requirements and still be crap because many companies do the bare minimum required and use the cheapest materials because these areas don't MATTER as much. There are two other posters on here who also belong to VA who agree their disabled facilities are not up to standard.

[Sparklysilversequins]

Sorry that should be I would give the other changing areas 9/10.

[WireCat]

What it needs is to be open plan as it is, but with a dividing wall, half way down the room, between the shower & loo.

[GreenLandsOfHome]

I get where you're coming from - if the conditions are truly awful/smelly/dirty, that's not on. But I do think you are being a little short sighted.

Companies will spend money where it will have the most benefit. A local spa/beauty salon to me has the most beautiful ladies room, really swish. The mens in very basic though. It's because most of their clientèle are women.

In this case, most users will not be using the disabled facilities. So if there is money to be ploughed into 'nicer' facilities, in terms of decoration, they're going to use it where it will have the maximum benefit for them as a company.

[CrohnicallyChanging]

Your OP mentioned the toilet being in the same room as the shower and used that as an example of how gross the room is. Several people have told you why that is- ie many disabled people prefer that. So if that was the main part of your complaint, YABU.

Now you are complaining that the room is dirty, smelly, and things don't work. So YANBU to expect the room to be clean and have working dryers etc.

[Cindy34]

Keep raising it with club management. Suggest ways it can be improved, how fixtures could be improved to make it similar to non-disabled facility quality.

Virgin may not have built the club, they brought Esporta and may have brought other chains, so they took on existing facilities and over time change it to their brand. Going to different VAs I certainly notice differences in layout, quality of fittings, even between clubs which I knew were former Esporta. There are different levels of club, some are a lot cheaper than others.
However I do agree with you that disabled facilities in club should match with quality level of the rest of that particular club.

[Sparklysilversequins]

I've talked about those issues throughout the thread. I've said repeatedly that the standard is not the same. I am not just NOW mentioning them at all.

Anyway I am stepping away from this thread because I do wonder why some posters think I should just accept this because that's how it always was and that it's fine because it suits people with different disabilities. It doesn't suit my two dc with significant SN including autism, dyspraxia and hypermobility.

It's just the same old story. THOSE kinds of disabilities don't matter as much as the ones that are immediately obvious. To make a swimming trip work for us my ds who was stuck trying to dress himself alone today and who couldn't manage it because he had turned his t shirt inside out and didn't know how to turn it back again, has to go away alone and without help. It's WRONG and those who think that I should just STFU about it and accept it because SOME disabilities are catered for are clueless. But hey no surprises there.

[Sparklysilversequins]

Thanks to all the posters who understood what I was trying to say and didn't do the usual pernickety MN AIBU carp.

[Viviennemary]

I think it's reasonable to say the facilities for disabled people should definitely not be shabbier or below standard. You could complain and say you are not happy with the facilities. And they should be improved.

[blahblahblah2014]

YABU to take an 11 year old boy into the ladies shower/changing area.

[Sparklysilversequins]

Go fuck yourself blahblahblah

[GreenLandsOfHome]

Happen to agree. YABU to take an 11 year old into a ladies changing room.

I don't understand either why he had to manage alone...why can't you go in with him? If it's a disabled toilet/shower, I can't imagine it's impossible to fit more than one in?

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

Its sad one person is so ignorant.

But for another to agree. Just totally depressing.

Don't let them get to you sparkly.

They know nothing of your life.

[IamInvisible]

She is not being unreasonable to take her DS into the ladies at all. He has SN, the disabled changing room is not suitable and he can not manage by himself.

I agree the standard of the fitting and fixtures and the level of cleanliness should be exactly the same throughout all changing rooms Sparkly.

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

Yes she is not.

And its fucking insensitive to the difficulties they face to come on and post a one word insulting sentence about her taking him into ladies.

:(

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

A few word sentence.

Meh.

I think I made point.

[Sparklysilversequins]

I can't go in with him because we can't use the showers there, they are disgusting. So I shower him in the ladies and then he changes in the disabled room because it's just about suitable for that. But then I have my other AUTISTIC child who is a GIRL who needs helping too, she's younger. The layout is such that we can't all shower in the ladies and then walk back round the pool, having showered to get there. So ds goes through the gents, which he is not ALLOWED to use unsupervised at his age to get to the disabled. Can you see the issue? The total complication of what should be an easy swimming trip because my dc have autism?

[WooWooOwl]

OP says she used the ladies shower with her ds because the disabled facility wasn't well maintained and it was of a lower standard than the facilities in the other changing rooms. Plus she got grief from the cleaner about the water on the floor when she used the disabled shower.

Therefore the club is at fault, not the OP.

I personally can't see the problem with the shower and the toilet being in the same room, but if it's not being cleaned properly and the water from the shower doesn't drain away properly, then again, that's the fault of the club, and it has put OP in the position of feeling she has to use the ladies shower with her child.

[blahblahblah2014]

It is against Virgin club regulations for children over 8 to use the showering/changing facilities. The disabled room, which has a shower and toilet and sounds perfectly fine, is what you should be using if you need to assist him. If the hairdryer is not of the same quality as the other rooms then speak to someone at the club, but rules are rules and although i see your predicament it's innapproppiate to take an 11 year old boy into the ladies showers, and this view has been taken by many MN'ers on other threads