to wonder if I missed out...

[SunshineQuack]

So, the backstory.

I went to an all girls boarding school (it was horrific) and was also a fairly shy teen. As a result, I didn't really have boyfriends or get to spend a lot of time in mixed company until I went to university. In my first term I got together with my DH, we moved in together at the end of my first year, and got married straight out of uni. DD came along six years later.

I love my family to bits and most of the time I love my life, but sometimes I worry that I missed out in some ways. I went out for drinks with friends recently and they were talking about the crazy things they did when they were young, and the messy break ups and wild affairs and holiday flings. And I realised that I had nothing to contribute.

I don't want to have an affair or leave my lovely DH. I just want to stop feeling so boring and left out. I've tried reminding myself of all the fun things DH and I have done together and the stuff we've done as a family, but that's not helping today.

Other question to the lovely ladies who settled down young - do you ever feel like you're clueless in some ways?

No, not really...because my friends have been through such messes between them, that I felt like I knew what it was like anyway, often were the times I was a shoulder to cry on, the friend who could be relied to let them know that not all men where knobs.

If it is any consolation, op. Several friends (male & female) said they envied my relationship & the fact that dh & I met each other so young. Swings & roundabouts.

I'm 22. I met DH in my first year of uni. (a month of being there) He was in his second year. We literally spent everyday together in the second semester that we barely hung out with our own friends. It is a relatively small university so everyone knew we were together, that's how stuck to each other we were.

We had DS 1 year later, married the following year and now have DD 3 years after.
Do I look back and think "I should've enjoyed uni more"? yes
BUT, I definitely do not regret my family! I love DH incredibly. My children are my world, they've given me the motivation to do well for myself. r

Oops posted too soon.

My sister is living the life I thought I should've had (partying, traveling etc) yet when I really think about it, I know that I wouldn't feel fullfilled from it. She's having fun, and I'm happy for her, and I'm sure she'll have stories to tell, but she's also always telling me how "lucky you are to have your own family. It'd be nice to have someone I can share life with because there's only so much partying that a person can do" besides, DH and I have our own version of fun. Neither of us enjoy clubbing etc we love going out as a family, cinemas, dinner dates.

I do to think you should feel you 'missed out'. You've had different life experiences, not less met ones.

I had a 'wild' time during uni and shortly afterwards in some respects, but not sexually because I met DP in my second year of uni and we've been together ever since.

I don't feel upset that I haven't got a messy break up or a heart broken story (all my other relationships before DP were more casual and I generally did the break up!).

I have a full life with friends, and DP, work, lots of fun social things (albeit generally a meal our or drinks rather than. 24h parties now) and sports. My life is varied and exciting and I don't think it matters that I've not been very exciting sexually.