I wasn't BU was I? To remonstrate with kids?

[matildasquared]

I live in a terraced house and we each of us have a little garden space out back, along a pathway.

It's nice that kids play out on the pathway, and I really make an effort not to get pissy about my garden. I understand there'll be the occasional football in my rhubarb patch. The kids make an effort to be respectful.

I just saw two small boys (maybe six or seven yo) trying to take rocks out of next door's rock garden. When they couldn't shift them, they went into another garden and started pulling at the rocks which make up a raised bed!

I went out and said, "Are you looking for something? You're not taking rocks from people's gardens, are you?" After a bit of shuffling they said, "We were going to take rocks and then put them right back." (lol)

I pointed at the raised beds and said, "See, people use the rocks to keep the dirt in so the plants will look nice, so you really shouldn't take away the rocks." They kind of stared so I said, "So don't take the rocks out of people's gardens, okay? You're not going to do that anymore, right?" They nodded and I said, "Okay, great."

As I was going back in I saw a neighbour looking out her window at me giving me the absolute STINK EYE. (She's not a parent of one of the kids.)

I really was kind to the kids. They're nice kids but were clearly getting carried away with their little project.

Was that wrong of me to go out and remonstrate with them? I rather think I was doing the neighbours a favour!

Oh ffs she was probably just looking out of her window

Forgot to say YANBU but I'm sure you know that 100%

Nope you did the right thing! Unless the neighbours want their rocks taking

Yeah, but I know a stink-eye when I see it!

Her problem though.

Well if that was my 7 year old id be very pleased you had intervened before he disassembled the neighbours rockery!

And would also be thinking he was old enough to know that generally the neighbours prefer rockeries to stay put!

The only time I've actually shouted at kids out there was when some older boys (11ish) were PISSING in a neighbour's garden in the course of their football match. Not even bothering to find a tree, just right there in my line of vision from my kitchen window. I recognised them as kids from the posh houses a few streets away. I'm afraid I did raise my voice then and I used the word piss, as in "Would you like to go home and piss in your own garden please?" I don't regret that at all. Ugh.

I think you were perfectly reasonable! Doesn't sound like the kids were upset, and it was nice that you explained why they shouldn't move the rocks. Ignore neighbour, she probably got the wrong colour roses for Mothers' Day or something.

You were super lovely to the kids.

Ignore neighbour.

Maybe she was cross because she had seen the boys trying to take rocks and she thought you ought to be shouting and waving your arms at them scary flower bed lady stylee.
However it sounds as if you were sensible and kind - kids do get caught up in the moment and do daft things, all they need is a reminder (but lol at 'taking rocks and putting them right back )

Sounds fine to me

You sure the stink eye wasn't for them?!

Perhaps she was giving the kids the Look, or thought they were yours and had done something to her garden?

Yeah maybe catkind.

It also made me think: why is it always me who's the stroppy one and goes out to remonstrate and fix things?

Example A: last year I asked a woman to stop using our path and gardens as her personal dog run/dog toilet for her two big labs. I really did ask nicely the first time, after which I made a report to the council (which stopped her)!

Example B: the pissing thing, above

Example C: a few weeks ago a British Gas truck pulled up in front of our houses early on a Saturday morning with his radio quite loud. The worker got out and then went down a little snicket to work on a particular bit of pipe, turning up the volume on his radio, you know, so he could enjoy it whilst he worked. I came out in my bathrobe and asked him to turn it down. I wasn't even mad, I just figured he wasn't thinking.

I don't have a problem because I figure as long as I'm making a reasonable request in a civil way it's fine.

But it's always me? What's that about?

Yanbu good on you. You were polite and reasonable, there will be some on here later saying that you were too harsh and were damaging their little sensibilities.