To think that my friend's new diet of eating once a day is bound to fail?

[DoorToDecember]

My friend has decided to lose some weight, she probably has around 50 lbs to lose and could do so sustainably and in a healthy way.

She has been reading some dieting forums and pro anorexia forums and has joined a group of mad women who have collectively decided to stop eating breakfast and lunch and only eat dinner, from now on. Today was her 3rd day and I must say she has become noticeably more grumpy and often feels faint or nauseous with hunger by 11am.

AIBU to think this is unhealthy disordered eating and whatever she loses she will gain back after she starts eating more meals?

How can I encourage her to be more rational and sensible wrt her eating without seeming preachy?

Well, I eat only once a day, (usually), and have done for many yrs.

I do it to keep my weight down and am now completely used to it and rarely feel hungry before late in the evening, tho thru the day I drink quite a lot of tea/coffee (milk, no sugar) as this keeps me going and well hydrated.

IMO, "daytime fasting" it's a good/natural method of LOSING weight and/or of AVOIDING weight gain. (Tho it maybe won't suit everyone.)

Why do we even think we should be eating 3 meals a day?

Eating at regular intervals/set times must be a relatively new tradition and associated with refuelling due to working physically v hard/being very cold?

In the UK now, many of us are rather sedentary, plus we have CH and warm clothes/shoes to out the cold. So we probably need to eat a lot less than our forbears did??

While our ancient ancestors, (I imagine), would have had very irregular meals, (when food was scarce), and would also have had to survive cold times without heating.

So surely most of us (not under-weight) adults are fully equipped to last till evening without eating, esp if we eat daily, drink lots during daytime & are in reasonably good health? (Nb Obviously, people with diabetes, stomach ulcers or in poor health should always eat small amounts regularly.)

Therefore, I think you should encourage & support your friend in her efforts to lose weight in the way she has chosen.

Maybe just suggest that she drinks more (non-sugary) fluids (eg tea/coffee) if she feels faint/nauseous during the day?

And/or suggest she could eat a limited amount of fruit/veg if she's starving? (Eg an apple and/or a handful of cherry tomatoes in the day wouldn't harm her efforts I think?)

It's important for her to make sure she's getting all the right vits and nutrients so any daytime snacks should at least be HEALTHY ones!

But if she wants to fast until evening, why not just let her try? (I predict that she'll either get used to it soon enough ... or else decide it's not for her and try another way!)

Anyway, wishing your friend every success re her weight-loss goal!

I don't think the eating once a day thing as a strategy would necessarily worry me.

The pro ana sites would. I spent years on those sites. Some of my closest friends are people I originally met on them. And quell surprise, I have had either an eating disorder or disordered eating for the last 15 years. Not saying I wouldn't have anyway but they are not healthy places; they encourage people to get sick and help them to stay there.

I have been through many phases of eating just once a day. It is liberating not to be confined by breakfast and lunch. I find my focus and concentration is much better

Most people eat far too much

Those sites are definitely an eye-opener. I have an anorexic friend and did a bit of research to try and understand what she was going through. The internet is amazing and awful in equal measures I find.

There's nothing wrong with eating once a day, I often do it.

But for someone with 50lbs to lose, who isn't used to it, I'd say it's a bit extreme and not sustainable.

Her body will probably get quite a shock.

She probably feels quite desperate to lose weight. You've been a bit derogatory in your description of her and her goal so its as well to think about how to advise her in a non-judgmental and critical way if you want her to take on board what you're saying, especially if you know she's been browsing pro-anorexia forums. At least she's eating. Sounds like she may not be able to sustain her chosen way of dieting in which case she'll stop and then hopefully find a better way. We don't always get dieting right the 1st time.

I can't recall the last time I had 3 meals a day, I will eat 1 good sized meal a day and 'graze' the rest of the time. I also fast once a fortnight but have done this a bit more often in the past. I don't think its necessary to eat 3 meals a day at all, that would be a bit too much for me.

I think everyone's hunger patterns are different and to be happy and healthy it's best to observe your own. I am always hungriest in the morning and eat a big breakfast. I usually go running or swimming before work and have residual hunger from that for most of the day, and have 2 lunches. However, I don't eat much in the evening because I'm not very hungry. Other people are the other way round.

I can't eat large meals 3 times a day so I have smaller meals and drink plenty of water. I graze a lot so snack on fruit, crackers etc. Your friend would benefit most from a holistic eating & exercise plan along with a visit to the GP to check that there aren't any underlying health issues.

www.jillianmichaels.com/fit/

My husband does this , just eats an evening meal , he has lost 5 and a half stone . But he doesnt feel faint or ill doing it . It suits his lifestyle though , not sure i could or would want to do it and need to lose the same amount .

Pro ana sites are bad news for women (and men, I suppose!) with anorexia.

With respect someone with 50lbs to lose is not anorexic!

I watch supersize vs super skinny - I want to lose a stone and often have a nose at how the super skinny does it. I also read magazines with celebrity diets in them! Then I conclude I have no self control at all But eating once a day is ok. I don't generally eat anything until about 6 o clock in the evening.

springconcert someone with 50lbs to lose isn't anorexic, but probably has a disordered relationship with food, in which case they are much more likely to develop other forms of eating disorder.

OP, I'd be worried about your friend going on those websites- it sounds like she is desperate to lose weight fast, and that can be a dangerous mindset to get into (especially if she already has food issues).

springconcert - in answer to your question about how the superskinny one does it - speaking as a very slim person (not be choice just the way I am, would love to weigh a bit more) I really just don't eat very much and I move a lot.

I put in my calories yesterday onto a counter thing just to see and I barely ate 1000 BUT I've always been like that (mid-40's) and I don't have a very big appetite. I eat little bits all day throughout the day.

According to the nutritionist Dan Benardot, it's far better to eat little and often than to go too long without food. So instead of eating 3 meals a day, he advises splitting them in half so you eat 6 times a day at regular intervals. She's making herself more prone to putting on fat and losing muscle by not eating regularly (OK, it's more complicated than that but I'm too tired to look up my course notes, sorry).

I am fairly sure that this is being disproved by all the research on IF.

OP: maybe you should suggest she reads the Fast 5 book, or join the 5:2 threads on here. Fasting has totally changed my outlook re food. I feel like I finally have the tools for sorting out my weight and keeping it under control forever.

Nothing wrong with eating once a day, but severely restricting calories may not be the best way to lose weight

With respect someone with 50lbs to lose is not anorexic!

This is one of the biggest and most dangerous misconceptions about eating disorders.

Okay, someone with 50lbs to lose is not anorexic in the technical DSM way but they can very easily be EDNOS which can present in exactly the same way as anorexia but without the person being underweight.
If somebody loses a large amount of weight in a short amount of time by starving themselves, is obsessed with being thin, overexercises, thinks about food and eating all the time, binge eats and/or purges due to fucked up brain chemistry from starving themselves and spends time on pro ana websites but is still overweight then they still have a serious eating disorder. Probably not much less dangerous than anorexia (most deaths from anorexia are from issues not caused directly by the low weight).

Many many people with eating disorders are of a normal weight or even overweight.

Plus all eating disorders start somewhere.

What happens with just about every diet is that people lose weight quite quickly, then they go back to their old eating habits and pile it all on again. Very often they end up heavier than they started out because their body stores fat to guard against future famine. This is very well-documented.

The only sensible way to lose weight is to change one's long-term eating habits. I dare say there are some people on here who are happy eating only once a day but for most people it won't work because they will feel faint and ill. It sounds like this is happening to the OP's friend.

Of course drastic diets that help you lose weight quickly can seem much more appealing than undergoing a long-term process of cutting out sugary snacks and fizzy drinks, eating plenty of fresh fruit and veg, and having smaller portions. But if you want to remain thin, that is really the only way to do it.

Agree with PrimalLass it really is not necessary to eat little and often. In fact, eating regularly increases appetite where fasting decreases appetite

I have found the perfect diet and it's easy and simple.

Proper portions of everything exept fruit and vegetables.

Silly fad diets don't work.

I generally only eat once a day, my evening meal.
It's nothing to do with weight loss, but suits me as I suffer with IBS and brittle asthma.
I don't count calories, or make a point of eating x or y food for health, I just eat good food, most of it cooked by me.
I love food and cooking.

What works for some people doesn't work for others.

Why not fruit and veg ICanSeeTheSun? Do you have more or less of them?

Proper portions of everything

kinda vague doncha think...I mean what it a 'proper' portion??

I did this to lose baby weight after both DCs, it worked and the weight stayed off. No problem with it health wise.

"AIBU to think this is unhealthy disordered eating and whatever she loses she will gain back after she starts eating more meals?"
Yes, YABU.

I've been trying Intermittent Fasting and have found that not eating until 6pm works for me. Although it took a few trials before I could fast, and I initially tried spreading the calories over the whole day, having them as one normal meal worked better for me.

" Today was her 3rd day and I must say she has become noticeably more grumpy and often feels faint or nauseous with hunger by 11am."
Well it was 6 weeks before I stopped 'cheating' on a fast day, so day 3 is pretty early to be judging her attempt. Now I can fast until 6pm, drinks only until then, comfortably, but the third time I tried I 'broke' by about noon. It takes a while to adjust to a new pattern. I get through the day without feeling hungry/faint. However, I do not fast every day, just once or twice a week and never on consecutive days. I've lost about a stone so far.

I'm a bit like that. I only eat breakfast and lunch at the weekend when we're all together. In the week I graze a bit here and there and only eat properly in the eve.

I realise most people believe they will keel over if they don't have three square meals a day.

I feel sluggish when I have breakfast. I quite like the empty stomach feeling. I usually have a little chocolate first thing - I'm still here!

Oh and fully agree with whoever said eating regularly increases your appetite. If we're away and I have a proper breakfast...I'm ready for lunch soon after!