...to have referenced my brothers failed marriage in his FB rant about same-sex marriage?

[BadBadSister]

My brother posted a fb rant about same-sex marriage 'weakening family ties' etc, etc. Blah, blah...you know the type of thing.

Bad enough...even if you aren't separated from your own wife, after she found out you'd been f**king around with mutual work colleagues (more than one), just weeks after your wedding. He was married for about two months in total before her family sent him back home to the UK.

So...hating my brothers bigotry as I do...I posted a 'really? you really want to go there? Some people (maybe exwife for example) may think that you're not really in any position to be commenting on 'family values'. Just saying' comment.

He's now deleted the message, and messaged me. I know he'd be annoyed even before posting it, but I just couldn't help myself.

Was AIBU to have said what I did, or was I just unreasonable to say it on FB?

I've had a busy morning calling out bigots as well. I'm just glad I'm nit related to them.

YANBU

*not

Do you care? You knew it would piss him off, it pissed him off. Do you actually care whether it was unreasonable or not?

It's done and dusted.

The only thing I would ask is why you are friends with him on FB. I know blood is thicker than water and all that, but if he wasn't your brother would you be friends with him? He doesn't sound pleasant.

FWIW I'd have seen red too and have 'dealt with' those among my friends who have posted hate-filled right wing rantings about benefit claimants and immigrants. My friends list is now shorter and much nicer.

Brilliant! He got what he deserved IMHO, YANBU

You were right to do it. He totally deserved it. And I'd say you were right to reply on FB, because that's the forum in which he chose to opine.

Why the hell should you save someone's blushes? Being family doesn't give one immunity from being called on being a hypocrite. It just means that sometimes it seems like too much hassle to call them on it.

I want fb friends like you.
Mine like, have stopped having rows and are all terribly sensible and polite. Boresville.

THAT (your post) is what fb was designed for. YANBU

Well done. You made a totally valid point.

YANBU!

Yeah, he's been posting stuff about immigration too - which I've only just refrained from pointing out that when he lived in NZ he was, shock horror, an immigrant! Obviously, he must have been the 'right sort of immigrant' though.

serves him right. Sounds as if he thinks the rules only apply to other ppl, but never to him.

Just read the message - I'd been told off for referencing his personal life on facebook. To which I replied: 'Don't be a bigot then. I love you and you're my brother, but you're being a hypocrite. Just be thankful it's me pointing it out to you, because no doubt other people will have thought the same thing.'

How do you think he feels about me referencing his personal life on Mumsnet? I mean, it's not FB....

Good on you!

As a lesbian with a long term partner who I hope to marry I encounter this type of idiotic bigotry a lot. to you for helping to stamp it out.

hmm...I dont like stuff some people say on FB. I mostly defriend them though, when its obvious we don't share the same values and they're a racist/sexist idiot. Knowing that, I wouldnt even still be on his friendslist in order to see his posts. What would I want to keep reading for?

Tbh though I wouldnt respond by putting their personal business on a post for all to see. Not unless he'd personally attacked me verbally. You clearly don't get on with your brother and there's a passive-aggressive element to it too, as you wanted other people to see information about his private life. Id have called him out directly on what he said and left it at that.

My FiL does this too - he's very keen to give out relationship advice. He even took my DP (his DS) aside and told - TOLD! - him to end our relationship as I wasn't any good for him.

This is the man who has 2 ex wives and two children by each one. The reason for this is because he couldnt keep his dick in his pants. Of his 4 children, only one is now speaking to him. Probably not the best judge of relationships.

I applaud you-well done.

Good for you for calling him out on his hypocrisy.

Huzzah for gay marriage!