To think these comments when trying to lose weight are silly

[Ticklishy]

I am at the top end of overweight on the BMI chart, and have in recent months entered the obese zone for a while, as pointed out by my doctor.
I generally try not to eat too much (but I do cook nice dinners so it's hard) and usually say no to cakes and biscuits at work.
Whenever anyone, particularly at work clocks my efforts not to over eat, or eat extra, they always look concerned and say things like:

"Don't starve yourself"
and
"Don't go too far and lose too much weight"

I need to lose weight, I am clearly incapable of going hungry and am a good 5 stone away from being too thin.

AIBU to think these are stupid comments?

I have lost 4 stone since last summer, but my BMI is 32 so I am still obese. A couple of people have said that I shouldn't lose any more as I look fine the way I am now (so completely ignoring the health implications of staying this size). When I have said I want to lose another 3 stone some people have been horrified and say I will look ill if I do this (which I know I won't).

I take this with a pinch of salt and will keep going until I am happy with my size. I think as other posters have said, some people really are just trying to be kind/concerned, some people have a distorted view of size and really can't tell if someone is a healthy weight and some people want to keep a few fat people around them so they feel better about themselves!

4 stone! Well done.

how many more have you got left to loose?

Funny I was just thinking about this this morning. People comment on my lunches etc 'oh you're not eating enough', 'you're getting too thin' (I'm not).

When I was overweight no one ever said 'oh you're eating too much' 'you're getting too fat'.

I mean I know why that is, I'm just pointing out it's fair game to comment on people's weight loss or slimness but not the other way round. Why can't people just not comment at all?'

Thanks smiles! I need to lose about 3.5 stone to get my BMI down to 25, but I'm trying not to obsess over the numbers so I'll see how I look/feel when I get a bit closer to that target.

I agree, take it one day at a time and you should be fine. I think most people fail when they put pressure on themselves. You've done really really well.

Thank you :)

Most small talk is stupid. It's still nice though, people trying to make an effort. Aren't most people just trying to find something friendly and innocuous and reasonable to say?

It's so bloody rude to comment on what someone has in their lunchbox, unless you are going to say something nice, then you should button it! School trip, I took a cheese and tomato salad, another woman beside me started saying is that all you're eating, I could never survive on such a small lunch, I'd be starving....she just didn't know when to shut up, sometimes I wonder how people managed to grow up with such poor manners.

A few years ago I was trying to loose weight and went on the Cambridge diet to give me a kick start. I was lectured by everyone and his dog. At work a guy who is morbidly obese to the point of needing a special chair and not being able to walk up one flight of stairs told me off every time he saw me reminding me that it was totally unhealthy and was bad for my health. Once he even lectured me while tucking into a large donner kebab and chips!
I think some people don't like to see people change it highlights their own insecurities.
Good luck op!

Er...I think that's because the Cambridge diet isn't really a good idea. Swapping food for 3 milkshakes a day for weeks on end? That's not dieting, or looking after yourself, that's starving yourself.

The fat man with the kebab had a point.

Smiles it wasn't for weeks on end and I had consulted my Gp first he pointed out that a restricted diet for 6 weeks would do less harm that the high blood pressure, diabetes, high cholesterol that I am predisposed to. Being judged by someone who I know has been told to make major lifestyle changes or face life limiting conditions and illnesses is ridiculous.

This winds me up a treat. I have a slim friend who kept telling me I was "tiny" when I was three stone heavier last year! I'm not saying I wanted her to call me fat but don't lie ffs.

I'm now BMI 24, aiming to lose one more stone. She is insisting I'm "skinny" even though I'm still well padded. Other friends say I look great, done well, nice comments.

I've told her I don't want to talk about weight with her and she still bangs on about it.