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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU and WWYD - lost phone

19 replies

MarianneM · 24/03/2014 12:11

Really not sure what to think/do, and if I am overreacting...

Had a lovely family - DD1's school friends - over for lunch and play yesterday. The children are all Reception age. They had a great time together, but my phone has now gone missing.

I have turned our home upside down and no sign of it. Checking my phone records online shows a very short call made to the children's mother after they left at a time when I was having a nap so it wasn't me.

I am almost certain it wasn't DD1 who has been told not to touch the phone and she almost never does. But clearly I need to ask her about it. I justn thought I had misplaced it but seeing the call record made me rethink.

I have a younger child aged 3 also who sometimes plays with the phone if she finds it, but I would have thought I would have found the phone by now if it was somewhere here.

It is a very old and basic phone, not a smartphone or anything like that.

AIBU in thinking one of the children could have taken it? Would a 5-yo do something like that? Would it be very rude to ask their mother to ask the children about the phone?

I feel really upset about this, although the phone has no value, but it is an important means of communication for me. But more than anything, I am upset if someone has taken it. I feel so guilty even thinking about it. AIBU?

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 24/03/2014 12:17

Have you tried ringing it?

CoffeeTea103 · 24/03/2014 12:19

How were you able to check your phone records?

Original poster
MarianneM · 24/03/2014 12:20

Yes, of course, many times. Can't hear it around here but it is probably on silent.

No reply.

OP posts:
Original poster
MarianneM · 24/03/2014 12:21

I have an account online that shows the latest calls made and texts sent.

OP posts:
ProlificPenguin · 24/03/2014 12:23

Don't mention the phone records but do ask her to ask the children. I wouldn't mind if it were me being asked.

Check records again? See if any other calls have been made?

squeakytoy · 24/03/2014 12:24

Have you rung the mother and asked if one of the kids put it in their bag or pocket by mistake. Many young kids are given their parents old phones as toys now so if it was a really old handset that could explain it.

PeterParkerSays · 24/03/2014 12:25

YANBU - I would contact the mother and say that you can't find your phone after their visit but you do know that it was used after her children left to phone you, so could you please check with them whether they've scooped up the phone with their things?

If they're all reception age, it won't be malicious, just a child thinking they've found a new toy, and which they now need to give back.

squeakytoy · 24/03/2014 12:27

Have you rung the mother and asked if one of the kids put it in their bag or pocket by mistake. Many young kids are given their parents old phones as toys now so if it was a really old handset that could explain it.

AuntieStella · 24/03/2014 12:31

I think it's totally reasonable to ring up to ask if the phone has been bundled up with their stuff by mistake.

(BTW we lost a phone at home for 8 months - it had fallen behind a chest of drawers - so never give up hope!)

Original poster
MarianneM · 24/03/2014 12:32

I haven't contacted the mother yet as I feel a bit embarrassed to be "accusing" the children like that. But you have reassured me that it would be ok to ask about it, thanks all!

I can imagine they may have thought it was a toy and maybe been shocked that they can actually make calls with it.

But would a child just walk off with a toy from someone else's house? And not say anything to their parents when/if they discover it is not a toy. It bothers me a bit...

OP posts:
spongebob13 · 24/03/2014 12:32

a good tip whwn tryin to find a phone on silent is ring it and carry a battery operated radio around house u might hear that interference noise say in toy box or kids room etc. but no harm in askin other mums.

DoJo · 24/03/2014 12:32

I agree that asking the mother shouldn't be a problem - you don't have to accuse anyone of anything, just ask if your phone has made its way home with her kids somehow.

spongebob13 · 24/03/2014 12:33

how old are the kids? what age is reception age?

Original poster
MarianneM · 24/03/2014 12:34

They are around 5.

OP posts:
NearTheWindymill · 24/03/2014 12:38

Could easily have been scooped up with a jumper, coat, etc.. Could easily have been a "pocket" call to the last number dialled. Just ask but I bet it's at home somewhere, under something and someone sat on it; moved it and that's how that call happened,

Slipshodsibyl · 24/03/2014 14:57

If they have it I expect it is an accident. Even if they have picked it up on purpose it isn't a huge deal. At five they are still learning how to behave and are young to truly understand the ethics of taking something. Ask if you like, but in that spirit, not in a more serious way.

Original poster
MarianneM · 24/03/2014 22:35

FWIW I did ask the children's mother who was very nice and promised to ask her children....only for me to find the phone this evening from my 3yo DD's coat pocket!!

I even asked her about it earlier today and she said yes and guided me to quite a different direction from her coat...

It can only really have been her and I can't believe she could be so sneaky...to make a call on the phone and then hide it in her coat!

I clearly underestimate her...

OP posts:
MarvellousMabel · 24/03/2014 22:42

Haha that's 3yos for you Grin

God love em

Slipshodsibyl · 24/03/2014 23:13

Happy ending!

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