to feel sad that none of my friends have come to see me in my new job?

[AlpacaPicnic]

Its totally a FWP and I suspect I may be riding the joys of PMS but...

I 'lost' my job last year, but got a new one in the ensuing restructure... My last job was in the city centre and my friends would quite often pop in to see me if they were passing. (i do a customer servicing job in a public location so its not weird that it happens)

My new location is further away but not miles and miles... Yet nobody has popped by to see me. Not my best friends who both drive and have weekdays off. Not the people who live nearer or work nearer my new location. Not even my mum or my DH!
I feel a bit lonely and rejected.

I know I am being really silly but I have made the effort to go and visit people in the past and I guess I feel a little bit unimportant...
Someone hand me a grip? And maybe some chocolate?

You're mad

You're supposed to be working at work, not socialising.

Imagine if everyone did it- teachers, Drs, nurses, lawyers, dinner ladies, taxi drivers, all their friends visiting and chatting. The whole country would come to a stand still.

Visiting seems a weird idea to me, but why don't you see if you can fix to meet a few of your friends during your lunch breaks? I can see if it is a big change and you haven't yet made many friends in the new location that you might just be feeling a bit lonely and insecure (re-orgs are very painful IME)

Francesdrake - I love the idea of my friends having to come see me to hand in their STI samples! Oooh, how awkward would that be?!

Christ I couldn't imagine doing this I'd get pissed off!

It's a strange thing to do I must say

hormental fab word.

About 30 years ago a friend dropped into the office to visit me. I got rid of him as quickly as possible, but my boss gave me a right bollocking.

Quite right too.

Yes OP, I found the same when I started working in an STD clinic..strange that...

I think you're being over - sensitive. No one has ever come to see me at work.

OP has it occurred to you that one of the reasons you 'lost' your previous job and have been moved to this new, less handy-for-popping-in location, is precisely because you think it is normal for your mates, your husband and your mum to drop in for a natter during the day?

Might be worth having a think about.

Brokenhearted - I work in a public library. As I've said, I know for most people and most workplaces it wouldn't be appropriate.

But sometimes my friends would pop in to use the services and would come to see me and say hello while they were in. If I wasn't serving a customer at the time, then it wasn't frowned upon to say hello and have a quick chat about stuff... The same as I would with most of my customers actually.

Alibaba - its totally not the reason. Everyone on my pay scale was made redundant - it was deemed that we were no longer needed.

If you work in a library, then i APPLAUD you for persuading your family and friends to drop in and support a vital local service.

Thank you Frances.
Every little helps!

Can't say I have ever visited friends or family in work. We do however meet or ring each other every now and again for lunch.

That doesn't make sense.

I mean meet every now and again for lunch or ring every now and again during lunch.

Hi OP.

I'm going to go against the grain and say YANBU if it is something normal to your group of friends.
I read in your OP that you are some distance away now and presume this is the reason.
Just because lots of other posters work in environments where this isn't acceptable doesn't mean to say it is in all work places.
Maybe it is upsetting you more because of the hormones.

Maybe they think in your new job you want to appear professional and not have your friends popping by every 5 minutes! Although if it us out if they way, even a tiny bit, that's very different to popping in when you are passing

If friends visited me at my work I'd be sacked! I'm paid to do a job, not host tea parties with my mates!

Is PMT, sweetie.

Actually I kind of am paid to host tea parties for my friends... And the rest of the customers as well! We hold regular coffee mornings, friendship groups and 'special occasion' parties like for the Jubilee and Royal Wedding! I love that aspect of my job, it's a real way to bring the community together and get people chatting.
We had a tea and coffee fund for the parties, but we (the staff) used to provide scones, biscuits and cakes from our own money to make the events nicer.

But this thread has digressed somewhat. I know I was being unreasonable. I accept this wholeheartedly.

Thank you morethan for realising that my friends and social situation are not normal - I always knew that
My DH works in a specialised geeky hobby supply store where customers and friends will just spend the whole day discussing the hobby and meeting new people into it, I am in my 'publicly chatty' role and some of my friends work in pubs etc where it is more normal to chat to people... So for us, it really isn't that odd to be using our mutual locations to very briefly catch up. It wasn't always, maybe someone would pop in once a week or so... Sometimes they would just wave at me from across the room - sometimes they would come and ask me about something work related.

But I guess that a particular peculiarity of working in a library as opposed to other jobs is that we are actually encouraged to chat to the people using the service.., and if those people happen to be friends of mine then as long as other customers are not waiting to be served (and we are always on the lookout for people needing help) then I can chat and shelve or tidy books at the same time.

I love my job and cannot imagine doing anything else.