To have shown ds2 pictures of scalds?

[goldenlula]

Ds2 is 5.8 years. He has little fear and can find it hard to understand cause=consequence. He is a menace in the kitchen, which is open plan to the dining room. Today he was in the kitchen with dh while he was cooking some rice on the hob, ds2 kept leaning on the oven door (he is a pain at opening this) and his head was very close to the boiling water in the saucepan. Dh must have told him at least half a dozen times to move away, be careful etc, that he will scald/burn himself, it will hurt etc. ds2's reply each time was no I won't, it won't hurt (his reply to most things is this, even if he has hurt himself or broken something before doing the action).
Dh brought him to me in the lounge, to try to get back up on what he was telling him, which of course I did but still he wouldn't believe it, so I showed him some pictures on the iPad of scalds and burns. They were not very graphic ones, but ones showing some blistering and scarring. Was I unreasonable? This is an ongoing issue with him. He also has a worrying obsession with fire and will try to blow out the hob when it is on.

I'd just keep him out of the kitchen completely when cooking.

Kids like this are not easy. Some of them don't take warnings about danger seriously. I suppose in some ways it's better than being over-timid, but it's hard until they grow up a bit and realise they aren't invincible.

I'd shout. I've never been a shout mum except for instances like this.

If you want a couple of nice safe illustrations pour boiling water ovet a skinless chicken breast or into a plastic bottle.

Lucazaid sports ones crumple beautifully (do it in a big bowl, they are likely to fall over).

By almost 6 keep out is just not sensible, he will want to watch, he will want to talk and he will forget. Stair gates won't help as all 5y can open them.

Actually I was trying to uncrumple DDs school drinks one and ruined it totally, not demonstrate hot water hurts.

I'm going to buck the trend and agree with Donna. If you have young children in your house you should definitely not have hot water that can scald.

I can see no reason why it would be wrong to ask DC to hold hand in hot water until itbgets uncomfortable and then explain that boiling water is much much hotter.

cant you get a stairgate he cant remove? we have a travel one where there is no latch adults can step over it children obv cant i use that to keep mine out of the kitchen (he is 5)

I don't think Donna is recommending scalding your child. Your ds will naturally pull his hand away long before it will scald him. I would consider doing something that would demonstrate in a way he can relate to how something can hurt. not for one min saying hurt him on purpose but somehow make him realise you are not making it up. which is exactly what you were doing with the pictures.

I realise that there was no intention from Donna for me to scald ds2, but others were and I was just saying that our water is set fairly low for safety and so the boiler doesn't over work! Having spoke to a friend, who is a health care professional, I am going to try a traffic light system, red means no entry, amber means enter with care and green is fine to enter. She knows ds2 and agrees that making the kitchen a complete no go area will only encourage his inquisitive side and says she has seen this system work with children like him. I am also going to try using different ways of saying things as it is possible ds2 is interpreting what we are saying as he will hurt himself, when he is confident he won't so we need to use language that makes him realise that the item will hurt him iykwim.

The only time dd reached up to the hob I screamed no and smacked her had. If she reaches for something she shouldnt I do swot her hand.

I have tapped his hand, shouted etc. The problem is he can not see that it will hurt and as he can not get that idea, he won't stop, I am just trying to spoil his fun. It is the same with roads, he has to be watched like a hawk as he believes he will be fine to cross the road, but he isn't but he can not see that a car will hurt him because he says it won't. As I said, I have let him touch a hot cup of tea (on the outside of the cup) to show him it is hot and that is why he can't have it, but still next time he will try to take it from you as 'it won't be hot this time'. It is an ongoing issue tbh.