to be slightly sad that all my mummy friends are going back to work?!

[mymiraclebubba]

Please don't flame me!! I do know how amazing my dp is and I am loving watching my dd develop and am excited to be able to be there for all her firsts etc but where all my friends are going back to work because they can't afford not to I am becoming a sahm because I can't afford to go back to work.

I talked to my employer prior to maternity leave about P/T options for going back however they have already said that my job won't be viable and the options they gave me aren't any good as I have a physical injury (work related) which means that I simply can't do them. Even if I could childcare here is £45 a day at its cheapest and due to to the distance to work I can only do about 6 hours a day which only earns me £40 pre tax which just doesn't make financial sense at all. Working any closer increases the hours but drops the salary and also the opportunities available as it's a high unemployment area.

I am quite sad that I am going to lose all the amazing friends inhale made as they go back to work as I have already lost all my friends bar one since dd was born. In spite of me trying to stay in touch amd arrange meet ups etc people don't reply or turn up

I suffer from depression and anxiety which means I find making friends really hard and am scared I will head down hill again

haha i can understand the sleep deprivation! DD has been ill almost constantly since xmas with cold viruses, laryngitis and teeth!

Not BF - she refused it, hospital were shockingly bad and my depression and anxiety couldn't cope with the potential stress of it, i should be on morphine which means medically i couldn't feed her myself...

why are their bf support groups but no ff groups??!

Yeah....your right about the bf groups! Frankly, if I needed help and advice it was when my boy stopped bfing and I had to suddenly learn how to ff!!

As for going to groups, I never really talk to other mums either, I'm too busy with my destructive force of a child to ever sit down!

crackers isn't it! and whilst i do sympathise with the minority who experience negativity when bfing in public it gets my goat at the baby groups here that bf mums think they have the monopoly on rude strangers!! The number of sick comments i have had from randoms and my nazi-witch HV becuase i FF is insane! Ppl get all up in arms over anyone who dares comment in a negative manner about bf but apparently it is quite ok to abuse me because i ff but that's a whole different thread!

OP - as someone who found mat leave lonely enough I can understand where you are coming from - and I was lucky enough to be able to afford to go to work and didn't have depression and anxiety to cope with. You're dealing heroically with everything. It's really hard when groups fall apart like this and there are no easy answers.

You sound lovely though, and that is bound to shine through so here's hoping you will find a new circle of friends to be with you.

Thanks pointy that was a lovely post to read!

I am actually meeting another stepmum from mumsnet tomorrow - slightly terrified but she has rung and text a few times and seems really lovely so hopefully thatvwill be another avenue!