This morning, dh offered to help out with the general Monday morning chaos. He is never around for school runs usually, and I am up against a tight deadline for coursework.
conversation goes:
dh: if it helps, I can take the girls this morning, and let you get on with some work
me: hmm, thanks (suspecting the offer wouldn't be all it seems), but it's ok.
dh: no, really, if it would help then I can.
me: oh right. great. If you could take dd1 (goes to school out of county) then that would give me an extra hour or so which would be really useful.
dh: oh, umm. I didn't mean that. I meant more if you want to leave ds (19 months) here with me, then it'd make your life easier
me: 
, I thought you said you could take the girls?
dh: well, I've got stuff to do too, so it''d be better if I could stay and ds stays with me
me: yep, fine, but it's easier if you don't offer things you don't want to do. I don't find that particularly helpful. Leaving ds with you doesn't make much difference to my morning.
dh goes off in a huff. I am even more .