to ask how you deal with all the screaming, tapping, banging, picking, throwing

[girlwhowearsglasses]

Entailed in having three small boys..? (5, 5, 7)

I really feel I'm having sensory overload. I'm trying to be lighthearted about it - please make me feel better.

I was awoken at 5.30am yesterday and they did not go to bed until 10pm. my ears are ringing from screeching in my ear. if they sit down they are permanently rhythmically banging, tapping, teeth grinding, making repetitive noises, and so on. When I read them a story they are kicking, picking noses, making 'boy noises'. When in the bathroom they are splashing, screaming, jumping and trying to choke themselves on their toothbrushes. They are for the most part normal (one currently poss ADHD - in the system for assessment, but the others not).

I must say I often feel like lying down in a quiet room. I almost never feel like playing music nowadays.. Anyone else? Of course helps, sometimes....

meditation for kids recommendations with links anyone?

It's not just boys! I remember when my girls were 3 and 4 and my mate used to visit once a week with her 3 girls, ages 2,3,4
5 girls under 5, it was utter bedlam! We used to joke that they never sat down, always walking about shouting, screaming etc, I would have earache at the end of the day
You have my sympathies OP
It will pass

I do of course know a fair few boys, and they are definitely not all like this team - but, I've never seen three girls who jump on top of each other and can maintain the level of physical energy.

I do of course behave as if they are three large dogs, and take them out - although its been bloody horrible an dark after school so not so much until this week. I will say that this doesn't always work -sometimes they are worse after having done energetic sports.

I've got one of each and I definitely subscribe to the view that sometimes it most definitely is ' boys.' I speak from experience. Obviously some are quiet and biddable but a lot just aren't.

I think I'd work on separating them for an hour or so before bedtime. And maybe introducing a reward chart for specific good behaviours

I have 3 aged between 6 & 20 months and the noise at times makes me want to run away and hide in a cupboard until they've grown up. Numbers 1 & 2 are boys but believe me having DD in the middle makes little difference to the volume.

I cope by never having any background noise when I can so I get a chance to recharge. I also cope with early bedtimes (6.45 not unusual), exercise and gin.

I do sympathise.

I meant numbers 1 & 3 are boys. Doh.

I couldn't help laughing at "boy noises" OP - I know exactly what those are. My DD has started making boy noises too - she's like a feral animal now because of her big brother, ha ha ha

Why not leave the homework till before bedtime? It really brings them down and to earth and makes bed more attractive. Use the afternoons to run the legs off of them (yes, like Labradors). I often dream about my own private panic room, a silent dark place where they can't find me...

at the panic room Stupor

I do a meditation routine with my DD - it is like a switch, I can pretty much guarantee she will be asleep before I finish. We've been using since she was 5yo and she is now 10.

I talk her through imagining she is on a warm beach in the sun, laying in the sand at the edge of the water. She can feel the sun on her skin, feel the sand and the waves lapping, and hear the breeze and the seagulls. Then we gradually talk through her relaxing each bit of her body starting at her toes and ending with her head/face. As she relaxes she becomes heavy and sinks a little into the warm sand which shapes to her body.

This site has some good ideas.

I have 5,9 and 11 - so at one point 2,7,9 etc

I close the door to the living room and threaten then with certain death if they disturb me - and watch Doctor Who loudly

I also screech ...a lot ...repeatedly

but yes bed time is 7pm - 8pm with lights out at 9pm for the big 2 and if I hear a peep out of them after 8pm it better be an emergency

ditto any time befor 7am

Mrscakes that's a really good site. I will try it tonight

YANBU. I just have 2 boys (6 and 3) and sometimes I feel I have no headspace left at all because it's full of their noise!

DSis has three DC too and a very lovely pair of noise cancelling headphones that her DH brought home after a long flight. Apparently they work almost as well as wine. :)

(Added bonus is that they stop shouting for her from far away places - they have to actually come up to her and ask her to take the headphones off before she'll take requests!)

I saw an amazing idea on here ages ago by someone who just wanted an hour to read her book in peace - she took herself off to her bedroom with the book, a cup of tea and a wet flannel, and every time one of her DC came in and asked her something she washed their face. Didn't take them long to cotton on and leave her alone! #MaccaPaccaMum

I have 3 DS and 1 DD and my DD is the noisiest of the lot. However, I wouldn't stereotype the other 3 billion females on this planet just because MY DD is noisy. I bloody hate all the negativity boys face in the world today and the sweeping "its just boys" statements. What a load of crap.

I have 2 boys, one girl and another girl on the way... the boys move more but the girl is louder - my house looks like a blur of movement and noise, its very confusing and honestly exhausting. I think I will start smoking after this pregnancy - I used to love that lovely lovely down time standing out side with the door shut - I could still see the blur, but I couldn't hear it - outside noises were so much more relaxing.

{Yes I am an ex smoking scumbag}

I've got 1 x asd and 1 x asd + adhd and I wish I could tell you how to cope with it. But the truth is I don't really know how I just don't hear it any more. I am so used to it that I don't even notice. I can have someone over and be chatting away and it's not until I notice they have a weird sort of wide eyed being strangled while being rodgered by a poker air about them that I realise the level of noise is actually quite painful

Best I can say is I hope you have a speedy journey to that place.

We've always done the calming routine, bedtime wind-down, bath and story, lavender oil, blah blah blah stuff and they could still be found wide awake at 2am. It's a different reality to how most kids are and the normal rules don't apply.

re adhd, what works for mine is exercise - I know this doesn't work for all - it releases endorphins that appear to have a slight calming effect on him. He's also now been on meds for some months (he's 13 now) and this has taken the edge off a bit.

I tried to get them to do stretches and yoga type things but tbh, it didn't make much difference.

Do they set each other off? I know 1 child = level 1 noise, 2 = level 5 noise, 3 = level 20 noise... What about putting them in separate 'calm down zones' whenever the noise gets too much? so one to your room, one to the kitchen and one in the hallway or something.

I dunno. Just a thought. I barely know what I'm doing with mine most of the time so I don't know what I'm thinking trying to offer advice to anyone else

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/1901923894/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1394116948&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX110_SY165

meditation cd, gets my dd to sleep and they use it at school good luck!

I have one child, a boy of 6, and the constant noise is quite hard to cope with. I take my hat off to you for dealing with this x3.

I think it's just the nature of the child.
I was also clever enough(?) to have a sole girl, and the amount of energy she has pre bedtime for horseplay and 'noises' is unreal. I dont think its a boy thing, just a child thing.
i think it's essential to let them run aroud earlier in the day, and we always go to the local playground for a kick around after school to let off some steam.

We also meditate with her and it has helped.

Shouting and being cross ruins my evening, so I try not to do too much of it now, as it didn't work anyway, much prefer to have a calm environment before MY bedtime too.

Setting a strict bed time was essential - google sleep hygiene.

They do need their sleep, and while it seems cruel to enforce a strict routine, they will learn better and have better impulse control if they are well rested.

Also try the relax kids website. Good luck! I have two boys, one with ADHD and one possible, plus a dd Whois. Just as noisy!

HowYa it was a statement that boys are often noisy, how is that negative? And I work in school age sports education, so yes I do speak from a wider experience than just my own family.

I think it's a combination of things. I have a fairly high noise tolerance. Ds2's Reception classroom is quieter than our house! BUT my 3 can drive me a bit crazy (I have 5yo twins too, but b/g).

The first thing I would say is that the adhd one is probably winding the others up. My ds1 is borderline (ie. mild to moderate adhd). When he is at a friend's house our place is CONSIDERABLY calmer. I don't notice it coming directly from him, I just notice the difference when he is not around!

The second thing I would say is that it is also about what you will/ won't tolerate. It sounds a bit like they are running rings around you 'because they are boys'. Do they respect you? If you say, stay in your rooms and in your beds, they should really be doing this. I would come down a lot more firmly. Mine are mad and manic, but the twins are asleep by 8 latest and my 8yo is asleep by 9 latest. They never, ever come out of their rooms. I have had to sit in the twins room and make sure they are not talking (after 5 mins grace).

The third thing would be that if they are over tired, they will be more manic. 2 of mine are like this (1 is a girl, so it's not a boy thing) and she goes really mental when she is very tired. If they are getting better sleep, they should be a bit calmer.

Yes, sleep is important, when children don't get enough sleep they become little mad ones, more inclined to temper tantrums and the like.

As for the mother when she doesn't get time to herself, yuck. It sounds like the last one to get to sleep is keeping them all awake and then the first one to wake up is waking them all up.
No clever suggestions, there are plenty here already

this is why my personal collective noun for a group of small boys is a "rowd."