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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to boycott bloody boring buy something parties

87 replies

shggg245 · 05/03/2014 18:58

Deep breath - body shop x 3, scented candles, temple spa, boden, pampered chef, Jamie Oliver - blimey it's all too dull.

Got another invite and said sorry I'm not attending. 1. Very dull. 2. Can't get pissed. 3. Fed up of getting told off by some wanky demonstrator for not paying attention to life changing products.

Aibu to think it's just a way of guilt tripping friends onto buying stuff? Surely it's better to not bother if you've no intention of buying anything. My friend thinks I'm being rude and should show my face.

OP posts:
winterhat · 05/03/2014 23:09

If you "don't have to buy anything" then why is there anything for sale? Grin

Obviously when people attend parties they feel they must be nice to the hosts and take part in the activities offered. Unfortunately this sort of "party" takes advantage of good manners like that.

plutarch14 · 05/03/2014 23:11

YANBU.. If I want something, I'll go and buy it from a shop.

OpalQuartz · 05/03/2014 23:43

They aren't parties they are sales pitches. I go along if the person hosting is someone who would invite me to something socially that didn't involve selling. If the person hosting would only invite me to something that involved selling to me, then I don't go.

NobodyLivesHere · 06/03/2014 00:31

I got conned into one of these recently, a friend invited me over for a Bluebella party, being utterly oblivious to all things girly I assumed this was a theme of decorations or something. It turned out to be like Ann Summers, I nodded politely and got quietly shitfaced. I bought nothing.

Nocomet · 06/03/2014 00:48

YANBU, especially as they are the onky oarties the mummy clique bothers to ask me to.

SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 06/03/2014 01:47

I've been an Ann summers and a pampered chef rep. ANN summers sucked but Pampered chef was great. For the record, I never got anyone pissed. I never pressured anyone into buying anything and I got through the recruiting crap as quick as possible. For me it was about earning a few quid and having a laugh.
Yes it's pricey and yes it's a sales party. If you aren't interested, don't go. That WNBU.
You would be much more Unreasonable if you went along and got yourself pissed, talked rudely through the demo/cooking picked the goods to pieces and then spent the last part, where people place orders If they want to making sarcastic put downs.
Its an invitation. YANBU to decline politely.

Bogeyface · 06/03/2014 02:17

Whats worse is one I am being pressured to attend. A party where all of the commission will go to a charity in memory of a member of the party holders family.

You try saying no to that!

NoodleOodle · 06/03/2014 02:47

I think they're horrible, and as winterhat mentions, they take advantage of guests' desires to be polite.

I went to an Ann Summers party once, with no idea that it was a sales thing, I thought we'd all be having a drink and a laugh and regale each other with saucy Ann Summers' themed stories. As a naive late teenager, I thought I'd made a new friend and been invited into a fun new friendship group. I left sober as the drink was not flowing (hazy memory but think perhaps we'd been expected to bring our own) and a fair few more quid down than I could really have afforded at the time. And, after my politeness, I didn't get invited back to the lady's house for any more parties, or to join any of the guests in their friendship group.

Perhaps they're fun if you are getting drunk with your friends and getting a discount on products that you would be buying anyway but, my first experience has put me off for life. To the point where I would view the host with suspicion and re-assess the friendship with the new knowledge that they'd like to squeeze some money out of me.

I'd rather be invited to a genuine party, a shopping trip, and/or asked for some money or help setting up a business from a true but hard up friend.

justmyview · 06/03/2014 03:49

Someone in my street invites me to Pampered Chef every few months, but never invites me in for a cuppa any other time.I think that's kinda rude

FirstStopCafe · 06/03/2014 04:41

I've enjoyed the pampered chef parties I've been to. The tin opener I bought is amazing Grin

I don't get invited to many though. I think they would get annoying if I did. YANBU to say no if you don't want to go.

OpalQuartz · 06/03/2014 09:49

You would be much more Unreasonable if you went along and got yourself pissed, talked rudely through the demo/cooking picked the goods to pieces and then spent the last part, where people place orders If they want to making sarcastic put downs.

I don't think anyone has said they do that.

Pollyputthekettle · 06/03/2014 09:59

Yanbu.

I hate these parties. No I do not want an over priced candle, bodyshop products I can buy in a shop if I so wish or some naff jewellery which looks no different to something from accessorize. And I especially do not want cooking stuff as I hate cooking.

And I also have no desire to fund your lifestyle. Get a job if you need the money.

Thats what I would like to say but a blanket "I am busy" is all I can muster.

Pollyputthekettle · 06/03/2014 10:14

And I especially hate the attempt to recruit. I went to a candle party once and the sales woman started bleating on about how she used to have this amazing high powered job until she had children and simply couldn't leave her darling ickle babies and she was so lacking in confidence after giving birth and the candle had saved her. Blah blah. She obviously thought we would all nod and say ooh yes you are just like us.

It just got my back up and made me think she needed to get a grip frankly.

UsedtobeFeckless · 06/03/2014 10:21

Just say no!

I hate these - it's not a social thing, it's just an excuse to guilt-trip you into buying overpriced tat.

I had a rant on here about being hauled along to a Pampered Chef do to make up the numbers by a mate who was trying to impress some mums from her son's new school and the flaming demonstrator actually had a go at me because I didn't order anything! Angry Although it turns out she has anger ishoos and now has an ASBO ... Ha! ( Scheudenfreuden emoticon )

SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 06/03/2014 10:35

Opal believe me, they do!

OpalQuartz · 06/03/2014 11:29

PMSL at the Pampered Chef demonstrator with anger issues and an ASBO. Grin

JugglingFromHereToThere · 06/03/2014 11:38

Such a shame people can't just have a party or invite a few friends over these days.
I hate the commercialisation of everything.
Like on the radio I've heard an advert for raising money for a children's music charity by "baking a cake, take it to work, offer everyone a slice, and ask for a small donation"
Is it just me or does anyone else find that annoying ?!
Bah humbug Smile

Slothful · 06/03/2014 11:55

You would be much more Unreasonable if you went along and got yourself pissed, talked rudely through the demo/cooking picked the goods to pieces and then spent the last part, where people place orders If they want to making sarcastic put downs.

If I did get pissed at such an event, this is exactly what I would do. I just can't see why a sales pitch gets classed as a 'party'.
Thankfully, for the sales reps, I've not been invited to one.

Loopytiles · 06/03/2014 12:21

Supposed to be going to a virgin wine tasting one soon, school mum (not the salesperson herself) has organised inviting all mums in the year for a social eve. Accepted but now having second thoughts, is it rude to go and taste but not buy? Is it by the case?!

Puzzledandpissedoff · 06/03/2014 12:23

The aloe vera one was awful. I usually avoid these parties but got persuaded once and no matter what it was - stomach problems / arthritis / headaches / even rabies, probably - aloe vera would sort it in an instant

What a load of bollocks ... and the prices!!!!!!! Shock

SirChenjin · 06/03/2014 12:27

YANBU.

I boycotted them after realising that a)I can buy better stuff elsewhere for less money, and b)I was paying someone else's wages out of my wages!

The aloe one really was shit. I ended up having an argument with the host who was trying to flog the toothpaste on the basis that fluoride toothpaste was a poison - I just couldn't keep my mouth shut which wasn't quite in the spirit of the party perhaps

JugglingFromHereToThere · 06/03/2014 12:28

No, it's not rude to go and not buy Loopy IMHO
No ruder than inviting someone to such a fake "party" anyway
A virgin wine tasting?
Go, get as drunk as possible, enthusiastically sample the wines, and then go home (organise a lift home for safety)
Sorted
You wouldn't want to miss out on the social aspect if there is one
And, after all, there's no "obligation to buy" is there?

haggisaggis · 06/03/2014 12:41

Nothing to add except - ALPACA - your PTA has a wine glass collection??!! We have a few teacups and that's it!

oldgrandmama · 06/03/2014 12:42

Aaah ... I remember the good old days, when the only selling parties were Tupperware Parties. Few years back, I did attend an Ann Summers party blackmailed persuaded to go to it by daughter.

Actually it was good fun, since everyone got thoughly smashed and one usually very uptight colleague of my daughter's was persuaded to model a 'Norty Dominatrix' outfit or whatever it was called and went a bit mad with a whip and furry handcuffs before she passed out.

I don't really remember much about what happened after that, except weeks later, I found I'd bought a vibrator of such dimensions it was maybe modelled on the late Porfirio Rubiroso's greatest asset and a publication called 'The Sex Maniac's Cookbook'.

SirChenjin · 06/03/2014 12:44

Now that party, I could enjoy Grin