To ask you to help me like skiing?

[Lillilly]

I am terrified if skiing, but DH loves snowboarding, so we are going for a couple if days to a basic resort.
I can just sit and watch, but I'd like to be doing something really.
The ski fear is best defined as a fear of sliding. The best I have managed us to zig zag down a children's slope, by taking the skis off at each zig, turning then putting them back on to do the zag as I was too scared to turn, in case I just slid off.
I had lessons , the instructor thought maybe skiing wasn't for me as I was frozen by fear.
I watched some Olympic cross country, and thought small undulations looked almost doable?
Has anyone overcome ski fear?

Have you tried snowboarding?

In some ways the first few days are harder (you will fall over more) but in other ways I think you might feel more in control, and enjoy it more - just the ease of sitting down when you need a break makes a big difference. Also, you will first learn 'falling leaf' which lets you move in both directions without needing to turn, and also to stop dead quite easily. You probably won't get to the stage of linking turns in a few days, which you probably could with good instruction on skis. But it might let you build confidence and control more slowly?

(I say this as someone who learned to board first, and only had a skiing lesson after boarding for years though. Someone who did the opposite might say the opposite)

It's a nasty and unnecessary business. Keep well away.

A good instructor is crucial, and one on one sounds like the best option. You probably need to spend a bit of time towards the bottom of a nursery slope getting used to the sensation of sliding and free running and so on, before doing the basic movements of a snowplough turn in this very basic sliding - you'll begin the turn, but with absolutely no speed behind you, which will bring you to stop, before trying again. That way, you can learn what the sensation of turning from sliding is, before attempting a whole run of linked turns. You may also want to suggest to your instructor you try some basic snowplough garland turns. In a garland turn, you are basically sliding in one of the zig zags you described, but adding small movements to initiate a turn, the back to sliding, so you can get used to the feeling of turning without the actual turn. If you're one to one you can explain your instructor you need to go back to the beginning of the progression (sorry, I'm a qualified instructor so may be using too much jargon).

However, sliding is a big part of skiing - I love it, it makes me feel like I'm flying. If you really don't enjoy it, then it's valid to say so and choose to do something else. Loads of resorts also offer snowshoeing, or sledging, or husky rides, or have lovely cosy cafes with blankets on sofas outside so you get the view and the air and a nice vin chaud and your book. Honestly, I have a huge amount of admiration for people who give something a fair shot and then say, no it's not for me.

To add to fay - you can also learn falling leaf in skiing.

OP, I don't understand why you are trying to force yourself to like something you just don't like. What for? For whose benefit?

I ruptured ACL and ML skiing. My concern for you would be that you might be prone to hurting yourself. (I loved it while I could do it, BTW, I got injured because I'm just a malco).

I tried skiing up in Scotland this weekend. 2 hours with a private lesson was really helpful as they listen to YOUR concerns and go at your pace. So if you can, worth giving it ago. But totally agree that life is too short and it is fine to say, not for me, give me hot chocolate!

What scares the bejesus out of me (and I find my heart rate rising as I write this!!) is getting up a hill / mountain.

Button lifts, tow (SP?) bars are the work of the devil....

I was shaking after I came off the tow bar with the instructor this weekend and had to catch my breath and stop shaking for a few minutes before I even tried to snowlough badly down the mountain

has anyone else got over this fear???

I'm an instructor (on Mat leave though) and used to specialise in teaching nervous people. It's all about small steps that you in charge of. But if you really don't like it then you gave no motivation to do it so don't! There's loads else to do in resort and you'll only be there for a couple of days.

If you get vertigo from standing on a chair (and there's no medical reason for this which can be sorted) I would suggest that it is better not to bother. Personally I would go to one of the bigger larger resorts which have more stuff to do for a non-skier. Val d'Isere has a big pool right near the nursery slopes. Loads of bubble lifts if you want to head up the mountain for a walk in the sunshine (and can deal with the height of the lift in inself). There's also lots of nice places to sit with a vin chaud and a book at BoyfromthebigbadCity says.
Snowshoe walking can be lovely but is hard work so you'll come home fitter and relaxed from the peace and quiet of the mountains.
Does sliding downhill on a toboggan scare you too?

cross country, you can plan flat routes, they will probably be quiet so no one will see you when there is a bit of a hill and you take the skis off to walk (much easier to detach cross country skis)

i could never graduate fro the nursery slopes as although technically i was ok ish, it was the fear of having no alternative of getting down once i got to the top

I agree - it's an expensive business to force yourself to like when there's really no reason, other than your husband likes skiing...? I am learning to drive and suffer from the horrors (palpitations, nightmares etc) but driving is a skill I need to acquire, whereas skiing is entirely optional.

My husband likes to ski, but we usually stay with friends in Switzerland, and I hike along the cross-country routes or climb, read and meet the rest of them for a drink at the top of a run at the end of the day.

If someone invented skiing and went "Hey try this! Tie two planks to your feet and slide down a hill!" you would probably go "erm, nah" and rightly so. You don't have to do it. I'd take the opportunity to read, sew, eat cake etc. (i.e. things I enjoy)

I love skiing but.... not with ski's.
They are too long and way to hard to control when turning (well for me they are anyway)
You could try snowblades.
Much smaller and easier to control and you can keep the speed down much better with them.
I keep the poles too (most snowbladers don't use poles) but if you are a beginner and on the flat quite a lot you will need poles.
Probably worth a go to see what you think.
But if you don't the 'sliding' feeling I'm not sure if you can ever overcome it?
You could also try snowboarding. You spend a lot of the time on your bum anyway when learning.

I bloody hate it and will never go again. I've had a few skiing holidays, and technically could probably manage some of the tamer red runs. However I get progressively worse each day of the holiday as the fear becomes more entrenched. It's just not worth it, particularly given the expense. I am perfectly happy for DH to go on his own (and leave me to enjoy a blissful week by myself of wine, chocolate and crap tv) if he feels the need to ski.

DH loves skiing (is from a country where they do it a lot) and we go at least once a year. I gave it a go but its really not for me. I had friends who would say how lucky we were to go ski ing so I almost felt I couldn't admit I didn't enjoy it!

Anyway once I realised it wasn't for me I have had some wonderful holidays with time for myself and lots of walking.

You don't have to like it!

I've never got over a total fear of skiing, my DH and DC love it so we do go fairly frequently, I would be more than happy to stay home alone (actually that would be bliss ) but DH likes me to go and we always have a really luxurious time (it is a fab resort) - so I just go and read, swim, use the spa, mumsnet - generally have a lovely relaxing break .

I think ski-fear is entirely natural and it's all about self-preservation. I can still remember being absolutely terrified when I put skis on for the first time. I've just got back from a week's skiing and after about 7 ski trips over the years, it's the first time I can honestly say I enjoyed the whole experience and finally "got" what people find so exhilarating about it (I've had to battle my naturally cautious nature). This was largely down to a) negotiating chairlift dismounts successfully; b) having had brilliant and patient instructors and c) skiing with a friend of the same level (my 8 year old twins leave me for dust already). 121 tuition may be more expensive than group lessons but probably not in the long run as you learn quicker. Persevere and try to fight your natural fears - all beginners have them. You'll get there eventually.

You can find flat cross country routes, or only with gentle undulations. However, you do need reasonable balance to do it, and I strongly suggest you start with classic style rather than skate (it's totally knackering, requires massive co-ordination and the skis are even thinner). You can pick up the outlines of classic technique from a book, but a lesson or two would be helpful.

I have clipped out of my cross country skis when I've been over-faced by a hill and quickly run down. It's a bit frowned upon on the higher grade (red/black) trails but on beginner routes there aren't so many people skiing down at high speed so it's less of a problem.

Oh, I've just come back from skiing. Bit sad now, even though my toes are scrunched and I have ski boot rash on my lower legs.

Frankly, I wouldn't go if you don't enjoy it. Nothing worse than a miserable holiday. My idea of holiday hell is a week at the beach and I don't subject myself to it. I go skiing every year instead. Everyone is different. I know lots of people who ski without their partners.

I am not a great skier. Some times I get the fear, sometimes not. but never as bad as you describe. It will not be easy to overcome - it sounds more like a phobia. If I were you I would probably give it a miss for a couple of years and see if you get a yearning to do it.
My DH is an excellent skier so he will take me for a bit but we will never truly ski together as I will never be that good!

You'll get there eventually - not sure that's true - I first went skiing over 40 years ago and have finally decided that it is not for me.