To want MIL to return enormous birthday present

[ohnotagainagain]

We live in a miniscule flat and specifically requested SMALL sized gifts for DD's birthday. MIL has bought her a dolls' house which is 1. a bit above her age for playing with but mainly 2. huge. There is seriously nowhere it can fit in the flat, we are crammed into every available nook and cranny, under the dinner table in the kitchen, under the cot etc. etc. even when things are well-organised. It wasn't the only gift, but is by far the biggest. AIBU to want her to take it back?

Ask her to keep it at her house for when dd is visiting?

Can she keep it at her house?

Can't she keep it at her house?

yep tell her no room and keep it at hers.

just keep it at her house as has been said.. then there are fresh toys to play with there. It's not a biggy.

It's actually extremely inconsiderate. YANBU at all.

My parents have form for this. I ask them to keep the present at their house. If you don't have the room, there's not a lot you can do!

I'd ask her to return it if its going to upset your DD not being able to have it at home though.

Ha x post with everyone!

Yes keep it at mil's

She only visits about once every 4 months and we have never been invited to stay over at hers (they live 100 miles away and a round-trip in a day I consider to be a bit much??) So v good suggestion but then it probably would never get seen. Maybe that's the point too .....

Thank you for the support, I felt like a bit of a b*tch and my DH isn't being very helpful either.

You aren't being a bitch. People with plenty of space don't understand how invasive it feels when what little room you have is taken away. The constant struggle to keep on top of clutter and think of storage ideas is exhausting, so it's really bloody annoying when people don't consider this. Can you tell I am bitter?

Sort it now otherwise it will set a precedent!

Oh yes, send it to grandmas.

We asked the same, which was promptly ignored by MiL and BiL. They took delight in buying huge, useless, age inappropriate presents. When we lived in a tiny, 2nd floor flat. And then commented on how cramped it was when they visited.

So inconsiderate and quite rude when we asked in the nicest way and they could see the problems.

It doesn't matter that keeping it at your MIL's will mean daughter never gets to play with it. Just tell her you have no room, so she can choose whether to keep it at hers or return it. Say it with polite confidence.

Keep it at granny's for sure. Even if you only go a few times a year. Maybe in 3 yrs you'll be in a bigger property, too. DD is 12 & still faffs about with doll's house she got age 2.

Thankyou everyone. Paloma you are spot on. I think you feel my pain!!!

Can I suggest that you just sell it and get what you want?! then you spare her feelings and you also get what you want?

Do you have a garden or yard? Can it be an outside toy? You could throw a tarpaulin over. It when it's not in use.

I know how you feel, my parents always buy my daughter massive presents at christmas and birthdays even though there is nowhere to put them, and they get offended when i ask them to buy what they want but as long as i can fit it in my flat. It got to a point that my daughter had no space to play with her stuff as there is no room and its not like she has lots of stuff either.

thankyou all so much. update: DH was persuaded on the lack of space and as crashbangboom said, the setting of a precedent. He called his mum and it is going back. I felt so bad, but now- I can't tell you what a relief this is.

Am glad it's not staying, DD may not even have kept playing with it once the novelty had worn off. As for feeling guilty - it's not that you disliked it, it just wasn't practical.

Glad you've sorted it