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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect my DH to learn how to do CPR

83 replies

Rissolesfortea · 18/02/2014 15:04

watching a programme on tv recently where someone did cpr on someone and saved their life I asked my DH if he would know what to do in such a situation. He said he wouldn't have a clue.

I told him to google it in case he ever needed to do it but he just shrugged and carried on watching tv.

AIBU or is he?

OP posts:
Weegiemum · 18/02/2014 16:45

My dh is a doctor who does yearly CPR updates, and pretty much insists on me keeping my (work related) first aid including CPR up to date - and our 14 yo dd has just done her first course. Once in his surgery and once in public he's had to do CPR (along with the many arrest calls he had as a junior doc) and both patients survived.

Dd1 is still going round the house singing "ah, ah, ah, ah stay in' alive" as that was the tune they were taught to do it with!

The "only if they're drowning" advice is very, very wrong - that instructor shouldn't be teaching!!

parakeet · 18/02/2014 16:49

OP assuming you are not a massive hypocrite and you know how to do CPR yourself, then why don't you teach him?

jamdonut · 18/02/2014 16:54

I've done many first aid courses over the years,but what is confusing is ,each time I do a refresher course,the advice on CPR changes,and then I get nervous about following correct procedure in the event of an actual emergency!!Confused Confused

Original poster
Rissolesfortea · 18/02/2014 16:58

Thank you for all your replies. Sorry I disappeared but I have been looking for first aid courses in my area there aren't many and I think I have found one being run by the Red Cross, I am going to ring them tomorrow and try to book us both in.

Having read some of the replies I realise that I am very out of date with modern techniques so a refresher is definately needed. Also, I look after my 2yr DGD very regularly so all knowledge will be good hopefully never needed.

This has made me realise how important it is to know how to help people in an emergency situation and maybe it has encouraged others to take a course too.

OP posts:
sadbodyblue · 18/02/2014 16:58

jam yes that's the problem I think. it was seen as too complicated.

look at it this way. no breathing and no pulse?

the person will die.

you are essentially pushing on the heart muscle to get it to start again so blood is pumped to the brain. that's it.

have a go if you are in that situation and remember to do something is brave, to do nothing is cowardly.

sadbodyblue · 18/02/2014 16:59

good on you op.

SockQueen · 18/02/2014 16:59

The exact correct procedure doesn't matter. Virtually any kind of CPR is better than no CPR.

The overall outcomes after CPR are poor, but for the few who do make it, good quality, early CPR is lifesaving. Most of the resus calls I've been to haven't survived, but in those that have, I can't think of a single one who didn't have very rapid CPR started by a bystander.

Having said this, I'm pretty sure my DH wouldn't know what to do - I ought to correct this!

RunRabbit · 18/02/2014 17:01

sadbodyblue I think cowardly is a bit harsh. Some people go into panic mode, which I think is a reasonable response.

JugglingFromHereToThere · 18/02/2014 17:07

On any CPR thread I like to mention the encouraging story about my DGP who one summer day when we were all at the seaside had a heart attack. The man in the hut next to DGP's was a policeman who got Grandpa's heart going again using CPR. I was about ten at the time. Grandpie lived a further 7 years til I was 17 - so I had all those extra years with him to get to know him better, and he got to see us all grow up < sniff >

littledrummergirl · 18/02/2014 17:30

I did a baby and child first aid course when ds1 was a baby. This was useful when ds2 was born prem and I was on my own. He was just breathing when the paramedics arrived.
I am a work first aider and so far have had two heart attacks - both patients survived. Chest compressions worked for them.
First aid is not for everyone though, it is scary and stressful and involves quite a lot of cleaning (patients can be messy after cpr). It is also very emotional. You need to be sure that your dh is ready before booking him onto a course.

canyou · 18/02/2014 17:38

I agree any CPR is better the none, I had to do it for my Dad he was witnessed arrest and we were unsucessful but we have no regrets we knew everything that possibly could be done was done and that is what is important.
I think CPR is more for those left behind, they know the event was not suvivable and everything possiblevwas done. CPR and first aod should be taughtvat school it is a basic life skill that can save a life

CynicalandSmug · 18/02/2014 17:38

I get basic life support (including AED) annually, which includes pointing out that the most important thing any of us can do is call 999 first of all. I have dealt with a number of emergencies calmly but luckily my bls training has not yet been required, I am not entirely sure if that is an emergency I would be calm about or even remember effectively particularly if it was regarding a loved one.

sadbodyblue · 18/02/2014 17:41

RunRabbit but it is cowardly. yes it's scary, yes of course it is, but doing nothing is essentially putting your feelings and needs above a dying person and that's cowardly.

if it was a loved one of mine and people just stood around hand wringing and gawping I would consider them cowards.

thankfully the adults with my dd and her friends did get involved way before the paramedics turned up.

canyou · 18/02/2014 17:42

Cynical you go into automatic mode and do it trust me You go to pieces after thou and I found it harder when it was strangers then my Dad

NCISaddict · 18/02/2014 17:55

Just a quick correction, just because someone is having a heart attack doesn't mean they need CPR. A heart attack can lead to a cardiac arrest but they are essentially two very different things.
Also in an awful lot of cardiac arrests a defib is useless, that is not to say we shouldn't have more available, we should, just that they cannot always be used. People do tend to think that a shock can always be delivered but that is not correct.
First aid courses kept up to date can and are lifesavers and I think everyone should do one.

Lilicat1013 · 18/02/2014 17:58

Sure Start often run baby and child first aid courses so that might be an option.

I definitely think it should be taught in schools so everyone has the basic knowledge. I was taught basic first aid in college, then did courses for work and a Sure Start course when my older son was a toddler.

I am not confident I would get it completely right or remember everything but I would try because as people have said something is better than nothing.

If you can't do a course there are instructional videos on You Tube which are helpful. I used it to update myself on how to deal with a baby choking when I had my youngest.

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 18/02/2014 18:01

People do tend to think that a shock can always be delivered but that is not correct

TV really doesn't help with this myth!

NCISaddict · 18/02/2014 18:03

Nor does the popular view on TV that a couple of seconds of crap CPR followed by a shock and the person walks out of hospital ten minutes later!Grin

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 18/02/2014 18:05

Don't forget if you wake up from a coma you don't need rehab! You can get up, walk, talk and go back to work within half an hour!

VelvetGecko · 18/02/2014 18:06

YANBU. Everyone, especially parents/teachers should know basic first aid. I had to put my knowledge into practice on my own child when he was just 6 weeks old. He had a heavy cold, I nipped to the toilet and came back to find him choking/turning blue. I immediately put him over my knee on his tummy and thumped his back and a huge plug of mucus came up. If I hadn't known what to do I doubt he'd be here today.
More recently he woke in the night having a croup attack barely able to breathe, again I knew exactly what to do and managed to get his breathing regular again. It is very scary but much less so when you know what to do in those situations.

NCISaddict · 18/02/2014 18:11

Tell me about it.Smile

Seriously though if someone is lying on the floor and IS NOT BREATHING (sorry for the caps) but it's really important then opening their airway and doing CPR is the single most important thing you can do for them. They are already as good as dead and you can't make it any worse but you can give them a chance. Make no mistake, it's bloody hard work but you may save a life and, trust me, there is no feeling quite like that.

MoreBeta · 18/02/2014 18:15

I went on a basic First Aid course with a man who trains paramedics and nurses how to do first aid. He was ex RAF regiment and was very down to earth. Said some really interesting things.

Obviously you do the basics like make sure you are safe and not going to get electrocuted or run over by a car. Then check for breathing. If not breathing do CPR.

  1. Trainee, paramedics and nurses and doctors he trains often stand faffing about checking for a pulse while someone is actually dying. Get stuck in with CPR.
  1. Dont do mouth to mouth. Get stuck in with CPR.
  1. Enrol other people to call ambulance ASAP you are only keeping the patient alive until someone arrives with more equipment and skills and until they can get them to a hospital. Get stuck in with CPR.
  1. Your chances of saving someone's life is 10%. Get stuck in with CPR.
StepAwayFromTheEcclesCakes · 18/02/2014 18:17

My workplace requires all staff to train in how to use a defibrillator. we also do CPR training etc every year. i was shocked to hear that 10% of people who need CPR survive the rest sadly dont but without it lots have no chance at all. its a hard thing to learn as you have to imagine yourself actually using it and I was stunned at how much force is needed. its not the gentle push you see on TV its not uncommon for ribs to be broken, especially in older people. This and choking first aid are essential I think for us all to learn and do think it should be taught in schools.

beitou · 18/02/2014 18:25

A lot of people I talk to seem to think that we shock a person to start the heart. That is wrong we shock a person to stop the heart.

When a person goes into cardiac arrest the heart will either stop, this is asytole people know it as flat line or their heart may go into pulseless electrical activity. PEA will show electrical activity on a defib screen but the heart will not be beating, it has already stopped. Aystole and PEA can not be shocked. We can shock a heart that is in either ventricula fibrilation, VF of pulseless ventricula tachycardia, PVT. In both VF and PVT the heart is still beating but doing so in an ineffective way that means blood is not getting pumped round the body. To stop this ineffective beating we give the heart an electrical shock. The shock will stop the heart and the body will restart it, hopefully in an effective organised rythm called normal sinus rythm. However just because we have shocked someone it does not mean that the heart will always return to a sinus rythm. I have seen many occasions when the heart has gone staraigh back into VF and a whole series of shocks are needed.

If someone has arrested and cpr is started and an AED is got to the patient their chances of survival are increased by a hugh amount.

It is quite scary to have to use an AED but they really do tell you what to do, open tyhem look at the pictoral instructions to show you where to put the pads, switch it on and do what it tells you, they really are vey good and are life savers.

beitou · 18/02/2014 18:27

Paramedics don't get first aid training, they are quite a bit more qualified at giving emergency medical aid than a first aider.