Been having a few words with DH over undermining me in front of the kids lately. He doesn't always agree with my 'rules' so doesn't want to enforce them. I pointed out that I don't always agree with his, but however I feel about them I never undermine him in front of the kids and speak to him about it later when they're not around.
I'm not a sweat the small stuff parent, I don't have millions of rules, we're quite a laid back family, but there are times when I say something and I expect them to do as they're told.
So, for example,yesterday. Cooked a roast dinner. Called everyone to the table, cue a lot of moaning about something they're watching on the telly. DH is then 'oh, it's ok, they can eat in there, they're watching something'. We have Sky+, they can record it or pause it. DH is genuinely not bothered about where they eat, whereas I know, if they eat in front of the telly they don't eat much, they spend the whole time gawping at the telly and not eating and food ends up all over the couch. But, whatever the reasons, I said eat up the table, so IMO, that's what he should be encouraging them to do
In the mornings before school, we have a no TV until you're dressed rule, yet every time he's down first, the TV is on and they sit gawping at it, he then buggers off to work and leaves me to deal with the fall out
I know these things on their own aren't the end of the world, but it's just the tip of the iceberg really and I'm fed up with it.
If I feel DH is being unfair or OTT I talk to him in private, not in front of the kids. I feel we should be united as much as possible about stuff like this.
DD2 actually said 'you're not the boss, Daddy is' the other day.
I've spoken to him about this until I'm blue in the face and I've had enough.