To go round to my MIL and do this..

[tinyturtletim]

Today MIL calls and says are we in about 12 they will bring lunch, so I say lovely bring some baguettes I will make them up for us all.

MIL & her partner arrive with pre made sandwiches from tescos, none of which I can eat as allergic to mayonnaise (fine not everyone can remember) she then goes 'oh I can't do anything right' I make myself a sandwich

they then proceed to sit on the sofa and scoff their sandwiches and WIPED their crumbs onto my floor!!! 1 year dd was on the floor and made a bee line for the crumbs. I am full of cold, had just finished all the cleaning before they arrived when I said in a jokey way 'look at the mess you've made' I was told by her partner I will have to hoover again!!

So wibu to go around their house eat the flakiest sausage roll I can find over their freshly hoovered bloody carpet and see how they like it?

What's a bakhavla?

Baklava, good idea! en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baklava very sticky and crumbly. Wipe your fingers on the cushions!

They deliberately wipes crumbs off plates onto the floor? Blimey.

I recommend croissants. Buy the kind you cook from frozen. They're impossible to eat without the most colossal mess, even with plates, when warm, fresh and crispy flakes on the outside.

I have to say, MN does make me realise how tolerable my own PITA MIL is. She's a whiner and self-pitying but she'd never, ever do this.

May I suggest a Cadbury flake in the summer? Not only is it, well, flakey, but chocolate is a bugger to clean up when it melts so it's likely it wouldn't just be a Hoover jobbie

Ha, it's a long running joke in out family that while MIL's house is pristine and nobody is allowed to eat/drink in the living room (people actually gasped when I was offered a cup of tea in the living room when I was heavily pregnant and struggled getting off the sofa!), in our houses she is capable of making more mess than my toddler.

God knows how but by the time she goes home there are manky hand prints all over cupboards (ones toddler can't reach so it ain't him!), welded on porridge in the microwave if she's done DS breakfast, crumbs everywhere, etc. I need to full in clean the house when she's left.

Then the other Christmas DS was trying a sprout, took a large bite, pulled a face and lobbed it over his shoulder. In almost slow motion it somersaulted through the air, hit the dining room wall with a splat and slid down onto the cream carpet. When I saw the green trail down the wall, I thanked god nobody had noticed what happened, scooped up the sprout and said nowt. Now every time she comes and makes a giant mess in our house I think of that (and the fact she has since spotted it but has no idea what it is of where it came from but complains how hard it was to get rid of) and I feel less pissed off. And before anyone thinks I'm terrible for not helping clean up her precious wallpaper, I shall point out she has ruined 2 of our carpets by repeatedly spilling lactulose (stickiest medication ever) and Christ knows what all over, not cleaning up and leaving us with destroyed carpet.

ipswichwitch my MIL is the same! Her house is pristine and must remain so. She visibly shudders if you put car keys down on the side. I spend my time there tidying and cleaning up after the DCs another reason we don't go there often.

Our house, however, may quite happily be destroyed. She and FIL dump their stuff all over the place and never tidy up.

"I have to say, MN does make me realise how tolerable my own PITA MIL is. She's a whiner and self-pitying but she'd never, ever do this."

Same here tbh.

Knocking crumbs onto someone's floor is so ignorant!

How about going round and taking a piss on her sofa, fake cough or sneeze, blame it on her son for ruining your pelvic floor

I handed them their food on plates, which they didn't bother to hold to catch their crumbs, they both were covered in crumbs and just wiped themselves off onto the floor, there were piles of crumbs on the sofa when they got up.

Ipswich I dont blame you for not clearing it up.

We just had upstairs carpets cleaned because of lactoluse markings from dd1.

I quite like the idea of pissing on her sofa...

Good job they didn't bring the baguettes then! Very bloody messy.
My pil always eat all over my house but at theirs it's strictly at the table.
Dd was like this the other day when mil gave her a banana in a dish at the table.

Just put a little bit of stinky blue cheese down the back of each radiator. Evil>

yep chocolate, glitter. glue and any utter tiny Ricky things from hobby craft.

however next time say no to a visit unless your dh is in esiecislly if you have a cold.

insist in them removing muddy shoes. assert yourself op.

Don't clean up before they come next time!

But I also agree about asking them to take shoes off and eat at the table. You can dress it up as setting a good example for Dcs if it helps.

The sandwiches would annoy me too - I just hate mayo but not allergic - so i would probably be unreasonable where you are not!