I got a retriever puppy three weeks after being married. It was a stupid decision (to get married, not the puppy) and my dog was a steadfast buddy through the first hellish years. She dragged me out for walks on the beach so we could play, made friends with other walkers (the area was new to me), sat down in the middle of newly-married tiffs and made us both laugh at our foolishness. She modelled elements of a balanced life when I'd forgotten what that was - by eating well, sleeping well, exercising well and having good times with her friends - us! I trained her carefully, putting the work in so I could trust her 100%. I always knew she didn't have to try so hard - to work from her heart in every moment. But she did, and I loved her for it.
We stopped walking almost three years ago. Both of us.
I had a much wanted baby and found myself saddled with a long-term, painful dysfunction of the pelvis. My dog, perhaps in sympathy, who knows, had problems in first one leg joint, then the other. I longed to evict Pain and have my body back, longed to get back to those secret wild woods and beaches where we used to prowl together, good friends without speaking. But it is as much as I can do to get into a mobility scooter and drive it decorously down the centre of the footpath while my dog trips along obediently by my side, instantly loved by everyone, including my daughter.
And if the most painful aspect of the last couple of years has been the feeling of parenting 'behind a pane of glass', always trying to catch-up with 'able bodied' parents and feeling sick each time I fell short, then by far the positive aspect of all this has been that puppy I fell in love with almost six years ago and trained to within an inch of her life. I'd always known I would love her and do my best by her. I didn't know she'd end up giving me back the one thing I wanted most - the chance to be a mother.
She models instant recall to my two year old DD, thereby enabling my DD to have more freedom than she might have had, because I trust her. She has demonstrated simple safety commands for someone standing and walking at the side of a mobility scooter: 'Back' 'on the pavement' 'stay close!' and, of course, 'no'. I would never have chosen to train my DD but it's a huge bonus that my retriever did it for me. Then came the day, back when DD's little legs weren't quite steady, that my retriever placed her solid, reassuring bulk between my daughter and the road - both hemming her in and supporting her. We reach the drive and DD says 'sweet home!' while my retriever glances at me with an expression that says, 'I did good, didn't I?' before they both demand chocolate. She's been doing nothing but good for six years now.
If that's not a good story, I just don't know what is!