or did I mislead this guy?

[Suzieshine]

I've name changed for anonymity. I have just received some text messages from a guy I was recently dating and I'm shaking and upset, but don't know if I'm overreacting. Basically I met him online a month ago, after a couple of emails we met up and had a fantastic date, but unfortunately went cold afterwards. Stupidly slept together, but as adults I don't see the problem, the chemistry etc was great at the time. When I didn't hear from him afterwards I thought fine, he's not into me etc. I was a little disappointed but quickly got on with things.

Fast forward to last week, when he emailed me to apologise, saying he regretted not staying in touch but at the time was "scared of commitment" (his words). I replied saying ok, accepted apology. He asked if we could date again, I said yes.

Then tonight we had this conversation by text:

Him: Hi
Me: Hi
HIm: Can't get that night out of my head
Me: Yeah it was good
Him: off the scale good have to try it again
Me: Sure
Him: What do you fancy doing?
Me: What did you have in mind?
Him: U tell me
Me: Your call
Him: your call lol
Me: when were u thinking of?
Him: anytime
Me: weekend?
Him: I fancy sex in your kitchen
Me: I'm not not one night stands. I thought you wanted to meet up somewhere
Him: I want to make you orgasm many times
Me: I don't do one night stands sorry
Him: u know you want to do it again and again lol
Me: not if you're looking for a one night stand sorry
Him: I'll delete your number

My question is, am I a fool in thinking from his initial contact that he wanted to date again? As that's what I thought he was alluding to when he initially texted me tonight.... Does it appear from the texts that I have led him on in some way? As I certainly didn't mean to. I wold have loved to meet up for a date, would have considered more, but the cringey texts made me feel uncomfortable. I got the impression at the end of the "conversation" he was angry, and now I just feel used and annoyed at myself. I should really just forget about it, but for some reason it has really upset me.

We are both in our mid-30's btw.

[loopylouu]

He's a massive prick.

[Suzieshine]

Thanks everyone, I'll try not to let it put me off but I'll definitely be wary next time meeting someone online. I agree Joysmum I'd rather know what he is like before meeting him/expecting more etc! I just wish I didn't take things so personally - the pitfalls of online dating I suppose!

[LessMissAbs]

Joysmum surely the demographic of people who are up for sex without commitment is quite limited, and assuming that the OP is one of them is where he went wrong?

I think he epitomises my idea of sleaze OP. Its why I would never do internet dating if I found myself single, I don't want to deal with that. Its easier avoided in real life.

[Topaz25]

Joysmum He is sleazy because he was not open and honest about just wanting casual sex. Had he said that from the beginning then the OP would have known what to expect and not been disappointed not to hear from him after the first date. Then he got back in touch with some lame excuse about being "scared of commitment" and asked to date again, then it turned out he just wanted sex. Wanting casual sex with like minded partners is one thing, manipulating people who want more is quite another!

OP, it's not you, it's him. Lucky escape!

[WhoNickedMyName]

surely the demographic of people who are up for sex without commitment is quite limited

If someone has sex on the first date, then they are having sex without commitment. I think it's a fair assumption to think they might do it again.

He was an arsehole for the cringey "scared of commitment" email, but as I said before, it's a lesson learned. If someone shags then runs, and then gets in touch a month later, I personally think it's pretty clear that they see you as nothing more than a booty call.

[Dinnaeknowshitfromclay]

I would have read it the same way as you OP.