AIBU to not want to take dd to the theatre

[Iwannalaylikethisforever]

A dear friend suggested a trip to the theatre and lunch together.
I have recently had a baby and was feeling very happy about the upcoming event.
She has now suggested we take our older dd's(both 14) as well. We are good friends and I immediately said, oh I'm sorry I was really looking forward to some adult conversation. I don't go out much and we live 2 hours away from each other. We are lucky to see each other 4 times a year and mostly talk on the phone.
She went quiet and changed the subject, she is not the confrontational type at all and now I feel really guilty.
Im booking the tickets this evening and am undecided about if I should book for us as all. This was her wish and her who suggested the show anyway. It has all been her idea and I guilty not wanting to take our dd's.
What are your thoughts please?

Would it be easier for her to discuss it by text than over the phone?

Could you stay over at her house that night or the night before and leave the kids in while you two go for a drink?

I know it is hard but the girls are 14 so they could chat to each other while you catch up with your friend, I suppose it isn't the same if you are gagging for a night out the staying at her house for a night sounds great you could have a drink and a catch up in the house afterwars and the girls could go off to the bedroom

I think you can still negotiate a compromise, assuming the play/show is suitable for 14 yr olds.

You go and meet up. You loose the teens into town to shop/find own lunch whilst you have the adult time. Meet at theatre for show.

Was there a particular reason she wanted her Dd to come? Does she have a childcare issue? Do your daughters get on really well?
I think it's fair enough for you to say you'd rather it was just the grown ups. A bit odd if she is truly really upset by this. Could she not take her Dd another time?

I wonder if her DD is having a bad time recently and she's trying to cheer her up a bit? Is that possible? if your DDs are not usually part of the meetings, could that be it?

I only say that because 14 is the optimum age for having a rough time with mates/education etc

Thanks for replies.
Smartie I don't think she would be really upset, as I said she was quiet and changed subject at my objection to bring dd's.
It's me - I feel guilty that she wanted to bring her dd and because she is a dear friend I don't wish to upset or cause a problem.
Maureen I think other dd is a lovely girl but is very into adult conversation, and tbh her and my dd don't really talk much when we get our families together as friends dd is listening and joining in her mothers conversation with me. If it were my dd is say something but my friend lets it go and it's not up to me to tell her to run along. That's why I'm not keen I suppose.
What do you do with teenage children do about this? It's actually quite frequent now.

Perhaps her DD really wanted to go and see the show too? My girls love going to the theatre and for lunch. 14 is a great age for doing this. A girly day with your DD's sounds lovely to me.

I agree. It's a totally different day out with kids in tow and it's not as if you see her loads so you can do a mixture I'd adults only and family days.

Before you book send her a text asking 'Am I booking 2 or 4 tickets?' and see what she says.

... or invent a reason why your daughter can't go and say 'maybe next time'.