I have N/C. First 2 yrs of separation EXH and I very good friends until he met his new partner who he moved in with after 6 weeks (4 yrs ago) and is going to marry.
Things have deteriorated massively since then and it has been a battle over everything (driven by her). I think he is in a EA situation.
He has stopped seeing 1 of the kids who wasn't his but he brought up and allowed to call him dad and there have been anonymous allegations that I drink drive (I don't) and I have been breathalysed, had police called and threaten to arrest me for harassment, allegations made against me at work. This outs me a bit but I don't want to drip feed.
Two teenagers that are his have chosen to continue to go to his even though they dislike her and she is not nice to them (puts them down, takes the piss) and they refuse to wash their clothes, school uniform etc.
It has now got to the point (past few months) where he refuses to communicate with me AT ALL - to the point where he refuses to even respond to a text asking what time he is collecting them. Which I feel is incredibly dangerous and encourages the teens to collude with him. Tonight 1 of the DC has organised with his dad (his weekend) to go out. His dad has not discussed with me what the boundaries are for DC or even asked if this is "allowed" - is he grounded etc. I think the potential for this lack of communication at all is quite scary and dangerous (he lives 2 miles away so the kids are local and seeing their normal mates so potential harm for differing rules quite high but sees the DC twice a month only).
AIBU to think we need to communicate on a basic level and what do I do as I don't think I can stop them going there?!
Help?!
TIA