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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that actually, I may die of sleep deprivation

76 replies

Fancydrawers · 21/01/2014 18:11

It feels like it. Particularly as she wakes every 1-2 hours with no let up, and has since birth. She is 6 months. This is how I will meet my end, I fear.

OP posts:
Echocave · 21/01/2014 20:01

God I feel your pain. Just finished 3 hour screamathon. I hate early evenings in particular.
I try to sort problems out but do think less can be more with night wakings. Although I am frankly the wrong person to give advice as I'm virtually crying this evening. All I can say is good luck.

doodahwhatsit · 21/01/2014 20:02

I want to run away too the place with lots of alcohol too . . .

5 month old DD alternates between hourly waking or 2 hourly waking and breast nuzzles whilst 2.5 yr old still doesn´t regularly sleep through the night

I was going to DC1 when she woke to compensate for ruining her world and giving her baby sister but started totaling the amount of time I spent per year sat at the end of her bed waiting for her to go to sleep and came up the weeks and went on strike Grin so only DD2 to cope with . . .

SharonCurley · 21/01/2014 20:05

Put her down just there and she slept for exactly half and hour then woke crying and wouldn't settle.I can't to cc

Original poster
Fancydrawers · 21/01/2014 20:10

At least we know we're not alone. Just tried putting her down awake but was met with screams until I fed. I have a constant pounding headache. In all honesty if I could get her to take formula I would sleep on the sofa and let my husband do a few nights!

OP posts:
SharonCurley · 21/01/2014 20:23

Me too.She never took a bottle for me.She is fantastic during the day though -all smiles, all the time.Would really love a few good nights sleep.Zthink I would look and feel fantastic!

pootlebug · 21/01/2014 20:30

Amongst the many things I tried (3 children....) was the No-cry sleep solution book. Putting the eldest down after boob but not-quite-asleep gradually improved her ability to sleep. It took a few months of gradual improvement but then she slept like a log. Didn't work with the other two but hey-ho. Number two suddenly accepted a dummy at 7 months. Number 3 is still officially a pain-in-the-bum where sleep is concerned but she's gorgeous, she's a lot better than she was, and she is my last so might get away with more than is really sensible.

appletarts · 21/01/2014 20:39

Feed her some proper food, like porridge and be done with it. zzzzz

tinyturtletim · 21/01/2014 21:39

My dd is 1 and we have had a horrendous time with sleep have just got a sleep clinic referral

How is weaning going? That is usually a turning point..

also getting her in her own cot would help for you, she can smell the milk and also sense your hormones so knows if she makes the noise you will do it, if she is in acot it will make comfort feeding less easy.

it depends how fed up you are with what measures you want to take.

Kittyburgh · 21/01/2014 21:39

Fancy when I read this I thought I may have started the thread myself but forgotten cos I'm so tired. I haven't posted on mumsnet for approx 3 years when DD1 was giving me sleep hassle. Here I am again with both DD1 (3 and a half) and DD2 (4 months) both giving me sleep hassle. Exactly as you describe, DD2 is a cosleeping, comfort sucking hourly waker. DD1 is a bed-resisting 3 times a night waker unless DH goes to spare bed and she gets in with me and DD2. I've read/tried EVERYTHING with one or the other of them. Nothing works (I won't bore you with the details, it's just a fact), it's truly hideous.

Deepest deepest sympathies. But also thanks, for reminding me that it's normal and I'm not alone.

Lucylouby · 21/01/2014 21:59

I know exactly how you are feeling, but we have come out of the other side of this now. I have three dc, the youngest is 3 now and we have regular weeks where all three sleep through the night. I now have the opposite problem where I can't get to sleep at night and then wake up while they are all asleep. There is nothing more frustrating than that. The children sleeping though the night will happen for you, I promise. It may take a bit longer, but you will get through this time in your life and will look back and wonder how you did it.

MyDarlingClementine · 21/01/2014 22:02

www.mumsnet.com/reviews/nursery/cots-cribs-cotbeds/9963-arms-reach-universal-co-sleeper-bedside-cot

we are still on nightly wakings, two usually and I am used to it now...i have not slept a full night for over a year, however this cot, has made life so much easier as effectively co sleeping but without that fear of co sleeping. even when i have been near dead with sleep i have been able to shift her over to her side...

i keep promoting this cot where i can because its been so amazing for me, and when people have been moaning about sleep and so on...i have been the lucky one, because of this cot!

hopefully they will catch on more, and people will have one of these upstairs and a moses down stairs.

4horsesforcourses · 21/01/2014 22:03

hey I'm six months ahead of you but in the same place.

I am alive

yes, I am alive.

I would contribute wit or sense, but look, at least I spelt some words ok.

MyDarlingClementine · 21/01/2014 22:03

btw mine wont take dummy or bottle, i tried and it was easier to carry on BF.

oakmouse · 21/01/2014 22:13

I had the same thing. It is torture. You will sleep again.

The good news is that you will never, ever take sleep for granted again, and will snuggle down each night with a sense of awed gratification. It will be a small, reliable pocket of bliss at the end of every day.

Trust me on this. Dd is 5 and neither of us sleep through the night, but it still feels like heaven. You will survive, but you will wonder how you did...

bochead · 22/01/2014 00:48

She's only 6 months.

OP- I have one like that who is now 9 years old lol!

If you can get one night a month where someone else cares for her (partner or family). If you can't learn to cat nap during the day when she does/on the commute to work, in your lunch hour etc. It's the only way.

CrohnicallyFarting · 22/01/2014 06:43

No need to buy a fancy co sleeper cot. We had a regular cot, took the side off, pushed it against our bed and wedged it there. We had 2 mattresses on the cot to bring it up to the same height as our bed- the cot came with a second hand mattress so we left that on the bottom and bought a new one which DD actually slept on.

Original poster
Fancydrawers · 22/01/2014 07:00

Thank you for the suggestions, sorry to those of you experiencing the same!
I do have a cotbed against the bed, she starts off in there but there is just a small gap that we cannot close between that and our bed which worries me. I shall try the side being on it and see whether that makes a difference.
God only knows what I will do about her milk when I return to work!

OP posts:
mynameisnotmichaelcaine · 22/01/2014 07:08

Many sympathies. The only reason I am not dying today is because I went to bed at 8pm last night - before my 7 year old! Any chance you could get some very early nights? Even interrupted sleep is better if it starts at 7pm!

Parliamo · 22/01/2014 07:13

I remember reading about a psychology experiment where I cat was put on an island in a pool of water, every time it fell asleep, the water woke it up. Eventually, it died.

Sleep deprivation is a form of torture.

I have three (3!) sleep terrorists. I am scared about going back to work because I will be so incompetent if someone notices I will be on incompetency procedures and sacked.

I feel your pain!

Binkybix · 22/01/2014 07:33

Yes to the pain. And I only have one! Genuinely has stopped me wanting another.

Thought I was going to kill someone at a group when she complained about a 6am wake up. I was all sympathy until it transpired her baby had woken that time AFTER 12 HOURS SODDING SLEEP!!!!

chickabilla · 22/01/2014 08:21

I sympathise, OP. Further on (11 months today) but definitely no further on in terms of sleep. Still alive though, hey! DD has done a five hour stretch a couple of times in her life but most often is up every hour or 2 and feeds 3 times a night. DS is 3.5 and wakes at least once a night. I have been trying to get DD to have 2 night feeds but she seems to have been having a growth spurt and now has ANOTHER cold. I want to hibernate!

TheRealAmandaClarke · 22/01/2014 09:32

another vote for "the no cry sleep solution"
Brew

Original poster
Fancydrawers · 22/01/2014 10:08

I always go to bed at 7/8pm, I have no life!

OP posts:
peppinagiro · 22/01/2014 10:13

Fancy - no good advice to add, but I'm in the exact same boat! My DD is also 6mo, co-sleeping, will only feed to sleep, bottle/formula refuser, dummy refuser, spends THE WHOLE NIGHT latched on and occasionally sucking, and wakes every hour atm. We have the odd run of 2 or 3 nights where she maybe goes 3 hour blocks and I feel human, but they're rare. Plus they probably only happen because even she's too exhausted to stay awake anymore.

You really have my sympathy. It's awful isn't it? I spent most of last week sobbing myself awake each morning. I actually reached the point of being desperate enough to try again with the cot, but she screamed, I was too tired to perservere. There's a lot of good advice upthread, but personally, I'm too tired to do anything in the night than just whack my boob back in her mouth and keep my eyes closed.

I found my salvation has been sticking her on DH in the sling one or two evenings a week so she sleeps there, and I get a good baby-free sleep until about 11 when he sticks her in next to me. Am planning that tonight. I may also have a glass of wine. That thought is going to get me through the next 9 hours til bedtime.

Hope you get some sleep at some point in your life ever.